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Also, as a tribute to the many on-line authors whom I've read, I've taken a few select lines (no more than a few really great sentences) and worked them into select chapters. If you see one of your sentences, it means you inspired me at that point! All told there are no more than twenty sentences in the entire novel, but I hope they show how much I value your words.

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Alone With Myself
Chapter Twenty-One

©1999-2002, WriteByMyself, All Rights Reserved.
Any duplication, in whole or in part, is expressly prohibited without the written consent of the author.
REVISION DATE: 19 June 2002

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Everything for Nicky. As Alex approached the stone platform, it reminded him of a bed. That was, he supposed, fitting. This was his final sleep. He stood by the platform and waited for instructions. It was a moment before everyone had finished becoming situated in their appointed places.

The King stood, and moved forward to a podium. Alex thought it odd that there was a podium, but didn't dwell on the fact. Alex began to realize he was noticing lots of little things that he'd not noticed before. He wondered if this sharpening of one's senses was part of the proverbial making peace with yourself before you died.

"My people, we are here to conclude a ritual. It was begun, but not finished." There was much murmuring at this statement. The Prince's failure was widely known and the crowd believed tradition must be upheld. Tradition kept everything running, smoothly, safely, and comfortably.

"Before we begin, we have some announcements that are directly relevant to this circumstance. This has been difficult for us, because no parent wishes to see his child die. Our child, my child," said the King, emphasizing the fact he had dropped the royal personage, "the Prince, is headstrong and defiant, much like his father."

The crowd began buzzing quietly because this was clearly going somewhere, somewhere unusual.

"There have been developments: the presence of Alex, for one. This young man, who, in short order, will be dead by one method or another, has done deeds more noble than all but our most noble citizens. We are not at liberty to go into detail, nor do we have the time." The King looked around for dramatic effect. He was a great orator.

"I, King Vonamoor, hereby grant Alexander Maitland full citizenship in our world, and as such, we give Alex the leave to die with dignity and honour. Guards, release his chains." This command caused an uproar. Alex realized this was a huge honour, and that must have been why people had been saluting him.

The Exarch knew that it wouldn't do to have the King raise his voice to control the crowd, and he, as he had many times before, stepped in. "Silence! Silence for His Majesty. Be still!" he commanded. The crowd grew still quickly in response to his command.

The King looked a bit angry at the Exarch's interruption, but held his tongue on that matter. "Alex, you may lie down now. Citizens, this rare honour is granted him because he deserves it. You will accept that." Alex lay down, and remembering his instructions, he popped the second pill into his mouth, masking it by making a motion as if he was wiping his face with his hand. He bit into the pill, and felt the liquid flow out. He used his saliva to help swallow the remainder of the pill, knowing he'd be unable to spit it out without being noticed.

"Prince Nikolai, please rise." Nicky rose and Alex could see Nicky wasn't himself. He was alert, but his eyes were glazed over, as if he were in a trance. Only someone standing near Nicky would have noticed he was very obviously drugged.

"Alex has given you the opportunity to finish what you have started because of his respect for our people and our traditions. Do you wish to do this?"

Nicky trembled. It was clear to everyone, even to Alex, that he was at war with himself. Alex knew this was unusual because Nicky should have been drugged enough so there shouldn't be any hesitation. Everyone else just thought it was a difficult decision that Nicky was dealing with. Alex glanced and saw Nigel was sweating. Clearly their efforts to drug Nicky did not go as well as expected. Finally Nicky spoke, his voice showing nothing, and sounding not at all like it normally would, "Yes, Father, I will do this."

The King smiled in relief, "Very well. Guards, please restrain Alex to prevent any unseemly accidents." Alex was confused that he had been released and now was being fettered again. He supposed it was so he wouldn't thrash around.

"In honour of Alex and at his request, we have agreed to let Nicky use a gun, the weapon of choice above, for this deed. As such we have procured one for him." The King paused and showed the gun for dramatic effect. While guns were not permitted in the kingdom, their existence was common knowledge.

The King resumed, "Alex has agreed to do this willingly, a feat, we might add, most of you would not undertake. How many of you would die willingly for your principles? Ask yourselves that. We say here and now that could this sentence be undone, we would undo it. This boy, no, this man deserves to live. Alas, it cannot be so."

The King handed Nicky the gun, "There are three bullets in here. Let us hope you do this task quickly and painlessly. Go! Do this deed, though evil it has become."

The Exarch began a chant. It reminded Alex of a Gregorian chant as the people all joined in. He knew his time was running out. Everything for Nicky.

With Nigel a pace behind, Nicky came closer and stopped about three feet away, standing on a small stone block. Nicky was visibly trembling. Alex wanted to speak to Nicky, to tell him something, anything. He knew he wasn't supposed to speak. He fought with himself, but knew he could ruin everything. He realized he was getting very sleepy. He struggled to stay awake, to see what was happening. But it was clear that the drugs Nigel had given him were going to overcome him.

The gun was aimed at Alex. Alex looked at Nicky, vowing to die with Nicky's face emblazoned on his mind. Nicky began shaking harder. Clearly, some part of Nicky was fighting this. Nigel whispered something to Nicky, and Alex heard the first shot. Everything for Nicky. Everything.

Although two more shots rang out, Alex did not hear the third one. By the second shot, he was gone to the world. Immediately after the first shot, he felt a sharp pain accompanied by a small, localised explosion. He wasn't sure if it was Nicky's shot or one of the packets exploding, nor did it matter. Had he looked away, he'd have seen a bright red spot seeping through his clothing. Following the second shot, he'd have seen another bright red spot growing in another place. After the third shot, he'd have seen massive amounts of blood. But he didn't; the last thing Alex saw was Nicky's face, and his last conscious thought was that Nicky had mouthed the words, "I love you."

Had Alex been able to see, he'd have seen something amazing. Prince Nikolai broke down and began to cry, sobbing on Alex's unmoving body. Although that was unusual, what was more unusual was the reaction of the King. Indeed, the King had tears on his face, and that was unheard of. Nobody could have known that the Prince's grief had broken the drug's hold over him.

A litter was brought to remove the body. Four guards came forward to carry it, but the King himself stopped them. "No! Nigel and I will do this deed. This is not a happy day nor a happy time. We have done what is required, what is the law, what is proper, what is traditional," almost spitting the last word. "But, we have not done what is right."

The King and Nigel gently took the limp and blood-soaked body of Alex Maitland and set it upon the litter. The crowd was astonished, as the King simply did not do manual labour, yet before their eyes he was affording someone the unique honour of being borne by the King himself. The King's own hand moved gently down Alex's face. "Come, Nicky, follow us."

Nicky was grief stricken, but he followed because he still wanted to be with Alex. He couldn't believe what he had done. He didn't understand. He didn't remember. This was all so wrong. He was ripping apart and he wanted to die. Perhaps that wouldn't be a bad idea. Death. Yes.

The King and Nigel lifted the litter and began a slow processional out the King's private entrance. The Exarch and some guards moved to follow but, with a fierce glance, the King bade them to leave him be. "This is a private moment to honour a hero to our people; a hero to me." His emphasis on the word me indicated to all exactly how important it was.

Together, the King and Nigel proceeded down the processional route in lock-step. Although they did not pass many people because most were at the ceremony, the ones they passed nodded in respect, not only to the King but to Alex. It wasn't long before they approached the King's chambers, and the guards at the doors stepped aside, opening the doors as they did.

In the King's private chambers, the litter with Alex's body was set gently down. Nigel immediately went to shut the doors, making sure the guards stayed outside. "His Majesty does not wish to be interrupted."

As soon as the doors were shut, Nicky immediately went to put his arms around the body, and as he tried to do so, his father grabbed his arm, preventing him from doing so.

"Son, come here. We need to talk. Now!" commanded the King.

Nicky looked up at his father, then back at Alex, torn as to what to do. It was obvious Alex was in no immediate danger. How much worse could you be than dead? He decided to at least listen to his father. "What?" asked Nicky, insolence and rage beginning to show in his voice as his head continued to clear from the drugs.

"First, you will cease your insolent attitude. Although it's understandable, it is unwarranted. I am your father and I am the King," said the King, and in a softer, but still firm voice, "You should apologize."

"And you should drop dead! What the hell did you do to me? How did you make me do that?" demanded Nicky. The King turned red with burgeoning rage.

Nigel interrupted to prevent a disaster. "Sire, I may be out of place, but the Prince's anger is justified, especially based on what he knows. He is entitled to an explanation."

"Yes, Nigel, you are correct in assuming you are out of place. Very out of place," said the King dangerously. His voice softened, "But, you are also correct." Had anyone else dared interrupt the King at that moment, he'd have them executed out of hand.

"Nicky, Alex came to me and said there was only one way out of this, and that was for you to kill him. He said you'd never kill him willingly. So, with the help of Nigel we implemented Alex's plan. You were drugged. The tea with your elevenses had a few drugs in it. It didn't knock you out, it just made you very weak and compliant. You were instructed to answer a few questions with predetermined answers, and then perform one action."

"There's no way you could have made me kill him. I just know I couldn't have done it. I don't believe it."

"Well, that is partly true. You can't be made to do something that you normally wouldn't do. But we made you believe that you were shooting at the deadly snake crawling on him."

"But there wasn't one, was there?"

"No, but you believed there was; that's what the drugs were for. That's why Nigel whispered a trigger word in your ear. The drugs were very powerful. Not only did they contain drugs to bend your will, they contained powerful hallucinogens. Even then we didn't know if you'd do it. You struggled greatly because your bond with Alex was very strong."

"I've never used a gun. I probably couldn't have hit him, especially while I was drugged. It's just as likely I'd have shot the Exarch by accident instead. How did I manage to do so much damage?"

"Well, this is where it gets more complex."

"In order to make sure Alex died, and the only way to save you was to kill Alex, we decided to put packets of cow's blood on his body. Then, if you missed, we could kill him later. Everyone would still think you killed him. It wasn't likely you'd miss on all three shots. You were far too close."

"I don't believe you! How did you make the packets explode? Magic?"

"No, it was a wireless electric discharge. Nigel himself pressed the switch when he heard the first shot. It had to be well timed. Though no hand is as fast as a bullet, it was fast enough to fool the audience."

"Gods, this is too much. I want to die. I really do."

"Nicky. Please. Don't say that. If you want to kill yourself, I can't stop you. But, before you decide, I have one last thing to tell you," stated the King. Nicky didn't notice this was not something a parent would say to a child.

"What?" inquired Nicky, barely audibly. Looking around, he could see the story was true. All the facts added up. It was the sort of plan his father would like: preserving the family honour, the Kingdom's honour, the old traditions, and doing the right thing even if it wasn't really the right thing. Nicky decided that he'd kill himself. He didn't want to live in this world. Not without Alex. Tears again came to his face, but he didn't cry.

"Nicky, and Nigel, I made one small change in the plan. And I didn't tell anyone."

Nigel looked alarmed, even surprised. Spontaneity and deviation from a plan was not what the King, who was rigid and inflexible, was known for.