Special Friendships - English Fashion
by N Fourbois

The usual disclaimer: this is a gay romance involving minors who over the years grow into adults. There is no explicit description of sexual acts, but the implication is that they clearly do occur. If this is not to your taste, read no further. The story was inspired by real people and events drawn from over a good many years, but these characters and events have been so heavily disguised and embroidered that I doubt whether any of the inspirational people involved would recognise either themselves or others. For information the age of consent in England is sixteen, alcohol may be legally consumed in public from eighteen, and these ages vary in other European countries, often downwards. The term 'public school' in England refers to a private or fee-paying school (modern term 'independent school') while a non-fee-paying school is referred to as a 'state' or 'maintained' school.

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Marc had spent three successful years at Buckton College when a new arrival was to lead him to embark on a voyage of self-discovery. How successful and contented would his existence be from now on?

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All writing is memory.

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Dedicated to the real Marc and Seb to help them in their understanding of how human beings work, to Lewis from whom I could have learnt so much more and to that mythical ideal school which is depicted here in a conflation of three I have known.

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I

September had arrived and with it the new school year at Buckton College. Fortunately the long warm summer was continuing without any hint of autumn yet. Buckton College, an independent boarding school deep in the Herefordshire countryside, had not yet yielded to the fashionable temptation, nor had it found any need, to introduce girls to its traditional way of life. Indeed, that it was one of the last few male bastions remaining in the English school system appeared to work in its favour for there was no shortage of names on its waiting-list. The School conducted a happy régime which successfully sought to extend with mutual respect the academic, cultural, sporting and general abilities of its pupils with an enlightened Christian background. It possessed its own chapel and Chaplain. Despite its conservative ethos it was by no means the backwater one might assume from its geographical location, but was embracing the best of the twenty-first century. If you were discontented here, you were probably discontented with any form of school life, unless you were seeking co-education, which was the occasional cause of losing boys between the fifth and sixth form. So confident was the School in itself that no one was retained against their will and their place was soon filled with a boy of a more suitable disposition. The foregoing might sound like the preamble to a lesser school's prospectus. The difference here is that there was no necessity to put it into the prospectus, and what is more it was true.
The College was well-endowed - everything at Buckton was well-endowed - which meant that its clientele stemmed not only from the unquestionably rich, but also from the not so well-off who could benefit from the education provided. Because of the high regard in which the School was held by both present and former pupils it was supported by a large, active and generous Society of Old Boys whose only wish was the continuation of the success and happiness they had experienced in their own days between the age of thirteen and nineteen. In their wisdom the Old Boys had rarely provided the School with direct contributions of money, but had over the years built up such a portfolio of investments in shares, land and property that these provided the material contributions that boosted the standards of the School. Certainly the Old Boys had won the right of two places on the Governing Body, but so effective was the management of the establishment that they never needed to dabble in politics, although the extent of their financial backing was such that if the case should ever arise their power would easily force the necessary touch on the tiller. The Old Boys also took a very keen interest in the rare occasions a Headmaster was appointed, and perhaps it was no coincidence that the present one was himself an old Bucktonian, albeit one who had first made a name for himself in the world before closing the circle on his career.
Under his leadership a five-year building plan had reached the third year stage and during the summer holidays six new boarding houses spread throughout the extensive grounds had been completed. The old ones nearer the main school buildings had already been demolished and the ground cleared. The next stage was to build the new sports hall and school hall with a theatre and so in the meantime the school's population would soldier on with the old facilities. Consequently the three hundred and seven pupils would be returning each to his own study bedroom, previously the privilege of the sixth form. The new sixth form privilege was to have en suite rooms. The downside of the School was temporary, namely that it resembled a building-site, but the inhabitants of the College were prepared, as they had been for three years, to tolerate that for the improvements to come.
Still, enough of the physical description. A school is made up of people, not buildings, and it is the people who will interest us.
It was the day before term started officially. Our tale begins in Paxford House. The school coach had just drawn up with a contingent that had arrived at the local station by train. Others had been brought by their adoring parents, anxious to spend those last precious minutes before being exiled from their loved ones and having to return home. They could meet Mr Dalton, the Housemaster, his wife and the other House staff over tea, and impress upon them the personal needs of their own offspring. Marc had returned the previous day at the request of Mr Dalton. Three weeks earlier he had received the results of his GCSEs, an in no way modest achievement, but particularly pleasing were the A* grades in his chosen A-level subjects which would bring him into even closer contact with Mr Bell, the Deputy Housemaster in Paxford. Under Mr Bell's benign influence over the past three years Marc's interests, both academic and extracurricular, had developed. In fact Mr Bell was the first member of staff Marc would turn to whenever he was in need of help and something had gelled between them from the very first term which worked to the benefit of all they had contact with and enriched and brought out the best in both of them. Marc's exam results had become his ticket into the Sixth Form. There was no automatic promotion. At Buckton you qualified, repeated or left.
Mr Dalton had asked Marc and his previous room-mate Tom Grey to be House mentors. A mentor was not a prefect. That was a School appointment which came in the Upper Sixth and had to be earnt. All the twenty-odd sixth formers took responsibilities in running the House, but a mentor was appointed to help the younger boys settle in and in return gave freedom from some of the more tedious house-duties. Appointed in the Lower Sixth they could keep a distant eye on their responsibilities for two years before leaving and the system had been so successful that it often led to lifetime friendships.
It was all hands on deck. Mr and Mrs Dalton were hosting parents and sons to tea and Marc was helping the House staff to entertain and talk to the families. He was enjoying talking to one set of parents in particular. Their son had escaped momentarily. Father was himself an Old Bucktonian and was regaling Marc with stories of his schooldays. As he had been a member of Paxford House it was natural that Sebastian, his son, should find a place there, too. Marc was impressed with how normal they sounded, no airs and graces, and how supportive of the School they were. He told them of his new rôle of mentor and that he would be in charge of a group of new boys.
"So they still have that system," said the father. "In my day that helped you to feel part of the place from the first week."
"If Sebastian is half as happy as his father was, we shall have nothing to worry about." Marc passed on with his tray of petits fours.
Tea over and the parents gone Tom, the other mentor, took the guided tour of the house and the school. The two mentors would not find out who their particular charges were until the following evening. Marc's time was now his own until House Prayers when Mr Dalton would formally welcome everyone back. He bumped into Mr Bell in the corridor who congratulated him heartily on his exam results. Marc had missed Mr Bell over the nine weeks of summer holiday and Mr Bell's mutual feelings were not even thinly disguised.
"Come up for a cup of cocoa before bedtime, Marc," he said. "Tell me about your summer. Now you're a sixth former, it might even be something stronger," and he patted him on the shoulder in a semi-hug. Marc returned to his brand new single en suite study to agonise over the arrangements on his poster boards.
The rest of the day passed as any day prior to the beginning of term. Marc was not on duty, so he could please himself. He put his head round the door of the sixth form common room and joined the gathering where they were chatting about their holidays and exam results. Supper was a noisy affair. The whole School ate collectively cafeteria style in the dining hall. It gave Marc a chance to meet his friends from the other houses. There was no atmosphere of isolationism and the boys were free to associate with whomever they wanted during their own time. In fact, in the warmer months there would be much toing and froing between the boarding houses, though that might not be so frequent with the new buildings, which meant farther to walk. It was dark by eight o’clock, the time for House Prayers.
The first time that the House was assembled in its entirety was at Prayers and this was held sacrosanct as an occasion not to be missed without an exceptional reason. Prayers were at eight in all of the houses for that very reason. They were held in the Junior Common Room, known as the Day Room, which meant they were rather cramped even in the new accommodation. Mr and Mrs Dalton were there, of course, as well as Mr Bell and the assistant housemasters. Marc sat with Tom squeezed onto a sofa in the corner. After prayers had been said, Mr Dalton gave his talk, welcoming the new members of the House, welcoming back the old hands and enquiring whether there were any problems still to be sorted, and of course the need to respect the fabric of the new building. Marc was in a dream. He jumped when he heard his name mentioned. Mr Dalton was congratulating those with particularly creditable examination certificates. Brought back to planet Earth and after he had acknowledged the applause he realised he had been staring, not into space, but at one of the new boys sat in the centre of the room. He was blond, slim without being skinny, with a lot of character in his face. Marc had especially been taken by the boy's blue eyes. He blushed when he realised what he had been doing, but that blush was taken as modesty for the praise he had received for his results. He thought no more about it at the time. Prayers drew to their conclusion and Marc went across to Mr Bell to enquire what time he should come for his cocoa.
"Give me until nine. Mr Dalton just wants a word with us and I should be free by then."
The new house had been built in two wings. The staff accommodation and ancillary areas took up two floors in the smaller east wing, while the larger west wing housed the boys' facilities, the junior common room and library on the ground floor, the games room in the basement, while the sixth formers had their own common room on the top floor. The en suite rooms had been dotted around the building at the end of corridors which resulted in closer supervision by the senior boys, while the Head of House's room reigned supreme on the top floor, slightly bigger than the others. Marc's room was at the end of the third form corridor with Tom's opposite, so he was not isolated.
Just after nine Marc made his way down to Mr Bell's study. As Deputy Housemaster he had a large study which acted as his sitting room, and a bedroom again with en suite facilities. A fire door led from his corridor to the Daltons' apartment, but it had been agreed that this was an emergency door as the Daltons had their private staircase. The other rooms on that corridor were used as guest rooms or for the case when an assistant housemaster needed to sleep in instead of in his outhouse accommodation. The accommodation for staff at Buckton College was generous by normal standards, but it was policy once you had passed a strict probationary year to look after the staff.
Marc knocked his special knock and on the command "Come in!" entered.
"Come in, Marc," Mr Bell repeated. "I have missed you this last couple of months and whisky was a poor substitute. A glass of sherry to celebrate your exam results?"
"So this is what the sixth form is about," thought Marc.
"Tell me about your summer, where you’ve been and what you have been doing and reading." Marc talked about Switzerland with the family and CCF camp. The CCF was strong at Buckton despite being voluntary. And after three years of German he had attempted to read his first German novel. It had been hard going, but he had succeeded. Mr Bell told him about his own holiday and the time passed quickly as they chatted and joked together. "Come on, Marc, time you were making for bed, sixth former or not." Marc said good night, thanked Mr Bell for the sherry and with a cosy glow coursing through his body disappeared back to his own room.
It was surprisingly quiet in the house. Marc met no one on the way. He simply went into his room, got ready for bed and slipped underneath the duvet. Instead of falling asleep immediately he went over the day in his mind. The morning had been uneventful for there had been hardly anyone about. The afternoon became busy with the return of the other boys and then his mind dwelt on Prayers, on the little blond new boy. What was it about him? Had he noticed? What was his name? He certainly knew about the adolescent crushes boys had, either on other boys or occasionally on young masters - rôle models as the jargon would have it. Was this why he got on so well with Mr Bell? But he just liked his company. He had never stared at him or felt attracted to him. Eventually the heaviness behind his eyes overcame him and suddenly the alarm was going for seven o’clock.

II

It was light and there was already activity about the house. Marc's first proper day as a sixth former. They probably would not have any lessons as such, though - Beginning of Term Service, Headmaster's Assembly, admin, timetable, induction, meetings, then after lunch games. It was an easy start for the new sixth formers. The old hands in the Upper Sixth covered all the duties to make sure that the term got off to a smooth start. It would be a week at least before he had any claims on his free time, with one exception. That evening after Prayers he would find out and meet the new boys he was due to mentor. At first sight last night they had seemed a pretty average bunch, normal thirteen year old boys, perhaps a little nervous in their new surroundings though none would probably admit it.
Breakfast at eight, back to the House, then Chapel at nine. No difficulty there. The House was sent across to Chapel at a quarter to nine. Marc walked over with his chum Tom. In front of them was Jackman. Jackman could in no way be described as a typical Bucktonian. He was now in the fourth form and after a year he still had no real friends, liaisons yes, friends no. It was a sign of the general esteem in which he was universally held that he was always called by his surname - Jackman.
In the close community of Buckton College boys were usually known by their Christian names or nicknames, but although several denigrating names might apply and were indeed used as terms of abuse, none had stuck. Indeed, if asked, I doubt if half of the boys in the House knew his Christian name (it was Michael), but they did know he was to be avoided. He could not help adolescence, but neither could the others of that age. His adolescence just served to contribute to his general unsavouriness. Although new, his school clothes were already ill-fitting and bedraggled. Other boys went to the doctor for their acne, he co-existed with his, intensified by the bumfluff on his almost fifteen year old face which just added to the local infection, for he either couldn't or wouldn't shave it off. Most of the school had never heard of, let alone seen boils until they met Jackman. His hair was long, black, straight and perpetually greasy. To him head and shoulders were literally what they were, a place to sport one's dandruff, but never fore-ordained to be combined into the brand name of a shampoo. The boys were issued with a clean handkerchief each day, but his were never seen in public. He walked with a stoop and his eyes stared from slits, but they were lecherous eyes matched only by his lecherous hands if you were unlucky enough to be too close to him. Consequently his liaisons were mainly with boys from other houses. If anyone could wimp out of games, it was Jackman, which alone heaped the disdain of the others on him. The most positive aspect about him was that he symbolised the general tolerance of the College for he was largely left alone even though he did not reciprocate that courtesy.
Marc shuddered involuntarily. His whole being went into defensive mode whenever he saw Jackman. The hair stood up on the back of his neck and he experienced an inner feeling of revulsion. Marc was one of nature's marvels. Just under six feet tall he had been blessed with a perfect physique and he knew it. His good-looking open face was crowned with shining brunette, almost black hair, parted in the middle, neither excessively short nor by any stretch of the imagination long. He had had to shave since the fourth form, but consequently the skin on his healthy and ruddy face was smooth and supple. Slim to begin with he had developed a natural sixpack which from his early adolescence onwards he had sought to cultivate. He was a graceful sportsman and while not outstanding in the sense of national potential could easily hold his own in the School rugby and cricket teams and most certainly on the tennis court and at the swimming gala. His friend Tom reacted similarly to the dreadful Jackman.
"Morning, Jackman. Remind me tonight to show you where the showers are." Marc was not usually that forthright, but Jackman was the exception that proved the rule. Jackman grunted in return and stared at Marc's trousers. Marc buttoned up his jacket and with Tom overtook him.
Uniform was liberal at Buckton. For school you had to wear a school tie of one variety or another with conventional shirt, jacket and trousers. You needed a dark lounge suit for formal occasions. Most boys wore a sports jacket and grey trousers. Marc and Tom as sixth formers were wearing blazers, but this was more a convention than a rule. The tradition of tolerance and freedom at Buckton could only exist alongside the positive spirit of its pupils towards their School. This attitude was handed down from generation to generation on trust and should any boy exceed the bounds he was quickly admonished, usually by his peers or older boys, but on the rare occasions the School was abused, retribution from the top was swift and it was clearly shown that there was indeed a power in the land. Every pupil knew there was too much at stake for the individual and the community and so the community had become largely self-regulating. This did not make the boys angels. They were as fun-loving as any of their age and there were plenty of high jinks, but everyone knew the bounds of acceptability.
The two pals went into chapel. Inside it was set out like a cathedral choir with raised wooden pews along the sides facing inwards. Sixth formers sat in the back row while the years graduated down to the youngest at the front. Marc sat there admiring the pillars and the vaulting. The Headmaster entered, everyone stood and after the opening prayer the Chaplain announced the hymn, "Lord, receive us with thy blessing, once again assembled here." Such hymns were anchor points in the school year and Marc had come to love them. They provided a form of security. The School sang heartily and then sat down to listen to the Chaplain's address. Marc, however, was not listening. He had been distracted, for opposite him in the front row was sitting the little blond boy, the one that had taken his attention the previous evening at Prayers. He was sitting modestly in his pew, eyes lowered, intent as only new boys can be on what was being said. Marc blushed. "Thank goodness he hasn’t noticed," thought Marc. He pulled himself together and tried to listen. However, the harder he tried the more he found his eyes wandering across towards the boy, not to stare at him, but to see whether the boy had noticed his staring, which would have been self-defeating apart from the fact that every time he looked the boy was sitting there modestly with his eyes lowered. So why had he blushed?
To Marc it had been one of the shortest sermons ever. Prayers for the new term were said, another hymn sung and the boys filed out to go to the School Hall for the Headmaster’s assembly. Marc was back in the normal world and in full control of himself. In fact he had forgotten what had happened in Chapel and suddenly found himself fully in the limelight as it was his turn to be called out onto the stage for congratulation by Mr Stainbridge, the Headmaster himself, for his public examination results. What he did not notice, however, was that every one of his steps was being followed by a little blond boy, a new boy in the third form seated near the front, and it was right that he shouldn't notice, for he might also have noticed farther back another pair of eyes, slit-shaped and surrounded by pustules, for the second time that day directed towards the curve of his trousers.
The rest of the day at school passed largely according to expectations. The games lesson in the afternoon was hard, the first one of the season always was. What was worse, the rugby balls were laid out, but not one was touched all afternoon - a psychological con, the carrot dangled as opposed to the stick for fitness training. Marc tried his hardest. It was a fortnight until the first matches. Marc was assured of a place, but in which team? He would have been disappointed if it had been in the 3rds, or even the 2nds, but being in the lower sixth there was hard competition for a place in the 1sts from the year above. Marc was lucky. He tackled well and had played both wing forward and centre in junior teams. When push came to shove he had filled in on the wing and at full back. Marc trained hard that afternoon, single-mindedly. At one stage he had to retire to deposit his light lunch on the edge of the field. It was no consolation that he was not the only one, but he went off for a drink of water to rinse his mouth and prevent dehydration on this hot afternoon and joined back in as heartily as he had done before. To finish the session off they were taken to the swimming pool. They showered off the dirt, plunged into the bath for six lengths and were then in their own time. Marc and his mates chased and bombed one another for ten minutes and got out. They showered off the chlorinated water, changed into tracksuits and took their kit back to the House. Although he now had his own en suite facilities, they only included a shower and he would have to use the general amenities in order to soak away the stiffness that was setting in in a bathtub. He lay back in the hot Radox water and promptly fell asleep to be woken up by a banging on the door and a frustrated enquiry as to how much longer he would be. Feeling much better he pulled the plug, dried himself, let in the waiting fifth former and returned to his room to get dressed into casual clothes for the rest of the day.
Chatting with the lads in the sixth form common room (they were as knackered from rugby training as he was), supper, Prayers. Conscious of the previous evening and this morning Marc made sure he sat where he could not see the little blond third former. He still did not even know his name. He would soon get to know them all. After Prayers Mr Dalton asked Marc and Tom to stay behind while he talked to the new members of the House. They would be introduced as the mentors and told the names of the five they would each be looking after. With the blessing of the Housemaster they would then take them off for cocoa and biscuits to get to know them. As the House was dismissed Marc felt his hair being slightly ruffled. He took no notice or rather he refused to take any notice for he feared it could be Jackman up to one of his tricks, although, just a minute, he could see him over the other side of the room. He felt relieved and still, in that throng, it could be anybody, either by design or accident, and so he thought no more about it.
Mr Dalton read out the names. "The first five will be under the care of Tom Grey," and he listed the five. "The remaining five will be with Marc," and to make sure, he read their names out too. The third formers murmured amongst themselves, Tom looked at Marc, Marc looked at Tom. They were ready to go. Mr Dalton said "Over to you Tom and Marc, now," and wished them good night. "Right," said Tom, "you’ll be coming to our rooms, but we need some help carrying the stuff upstairs." They took the group to the kitchen and loaded them up with what Mrs Dalton had ready for them and off they marched like the Pied Piper of Hamelin, ignoring Jackman as he leered at the ten.
As each group followed their leader into their respective sixth form study-bedrooms, Marc immediately noticed that the little blond third former with the smile and the sparkling blue eyes was not part of the crocodile behind him. He honestly did not know whether to be relieved or disappointed, such was the feeling of confusion in his mind. They reached his room, entered and they all settled down. Marc set about pouring the cocoa and got one of the others to deal with the biscuits. He handed round the mugs and only then did he notice he had one spare.
"Who’s missing?"
"Seb," came the reply. Marc looked at his list.
"That must be Sebastian. Am I right? Could one of you go and look for him?" But it was not necessary for there came a knock at the door and a face peered round. It was as if time stood still. To Marc the hubble bubble in the room became inaudible and in a few seconds which to him seemed an eternity his jaw dropped, he felt his face go hot, his heart palpitate and he nearly dropped his mug of cocoa. The face at the door looked worried, but the moment he saw who his host was it blushed, gave a most engaging smile and its eyes twinkling enquired "Are you Marc?" The voice hauled Marc out of his suspended animation. It was a broken voice, well spoken, one with that coarseness of adolescence before it finds its eventual pitch. The spell broken Marc said, "Come on in," and looking at his piece of paper said 'You must be Sebastian." "Yes, I’m called Seb by my friends. Only my parents call me Sebastian."
"Then Seb you shall be."
"Sorry I’m late. Mrs Dalton wanted a word and then I went to the wrong room and I’m to give you these," he said handing over another packet of biscuits.
The speed of his little speech displayed a certain nervousness, his body language by way of contrast a certain confidence. Marc's mind was in whirl. It had not occurred to him that he would be looking after this blond boy who had so taken his attention. On the other hand he knew absolutely nothing of the effect that he had had on Seb over the past day and a bit. He did know how Jackman's presence affected him, how he could feel his presence even when he had not even seen or heard him. Seb seemed to have a similar effect, but with this difference, that he enjoyed his presence and he felt his heart and his mood lightened by it. It was all a new experience for him. The tape sped up, the sound switched in again and Marc was back in the real world. But had he ever left it, even momentarily?
"Well, we’d better get to know one another," said Marc once everyone had been provided for. "I know Seb. Who are the rest of you?" Daniel, Ian, Rob and Ben. Marc got them to introduce themselves, to talk about their interests, their first impressions of Buckton, why they had come there, about the schools they had come from and finally Marc talked a little more about the School and the House and ended up with what he viewed his job as mentor to be and how useful his own mentor had been when he first arrived at Buckton. He looked at his alarm clock and saw that it was already past the juniors' bedtime and although they wanted to keep chatting in the end he was firm and sent them off along with all the things that had to go down to the kitchen.
He lay back on his bed and thought what a nice bunch he had. "I pity Dave Lane with that creature Jackman." Dave was in the upper sixth now and mentoring the fourth form. "I’m getting obsessed with Jackman," and he shuddered saying "Ough". He didn’t yet know it. He was indeed becoming obsessed, but it wasn't with Jackman. There was a knock at the door and expecting it to be Tom coming to compare notes he shouted "Come". It wasn’t Tom. It was Seb in dressing gown. His heart thumped and a feeling of well-being coursed through Marc's veins.
"I think I left my rough book here. It’s got my timetable in." It had slipped under the chair Seb had been sitting in. He picked it up.
"You’d better be off to bed or you’ll be in trouble." It was Marc who felt delightfully in trouble. "Have a good day tomorrow and if you want to know anything I’m here to help. Remember that," said Marc wishing Seb would want to know a lot of things.
Seb said good night and smiled that smile that made his own eyes twinkle and Marc's heart soar. Marc did not know what was happening to him. He was interested in a distant way, but not worried in the least. He got up off his back, went across to Tom's room and after another mug of cocoa and an exchange of their mentoring experiences went off to relax in front of some television.
Marc went to bed and as he lay there mulled over the events of the day in his mind. He felt good, at peace with himself despite his strange behaviour and thought he was in for a good term. Work tomorrow. Then he remembered the parents, the Old Boy and his wife he had been talking to at tea the previous day, and at that he dozed off.

III

Seven o'clock the alarm rang. Marc rose, showered and dressed. He liked routine. Buckton College encouraged routine seemingly without imposing it. Breakfast with his fellow sixth formers, get ready for school, Chapel, lessons. He was looking forward to starting his A-levels after a taster session in the Summer Term when his GCSEs were finished. He was sure he wanted to take languages, Latin, French and German, particularly German with Mr Bell. He had asked Mr Bell to present him at his confirmation. His parents had unfortunately been abroad at the time of the School confirmation in the fourth form and with their blessing Mr Bell filled the gap and Marc now looked upon him as an ersatz godfather. Although he respected the formality of the School system and avoided familiarity, it was his wish that once he had left Buckton Mr Bell might become a family friend and that they would remain in contact. Mr Bell had this gift of lifting him on those rare occasions he felt low. Equally he could rein him in when the opposite occurred. Hide it as he might try, Mr Bell could not disguise his admiration for Marc who, he felt, had everything going for him, intellectually, physically and socially. He felt Marc could have been the son he had never had. In its values Buckton was still one of those old-fashioned public schools that provided the home and family life for its bachelor masters and in gratitude for lifelong service it would provide practical support and assistance in retirement if so required.
Marchad finally reached Chapel after waiting for Tom and Doug to get themselves ready. He was sitting in what would be his normal seat for the rest of term, if not for the rest of the school year, and so he was not surprised to see sat in the opposite pews Seb. Not only did he seem to stand out from those around, as if a spotlight were falling on him, but he was staring at Marc, just as if he had been waiting for him. Marc didn’t know what to do. He certainly did not want to ignore him. After all it was only a reversal of rôles from the previous two days and Marc had liked him from their first formal introduction last night, but on the other hand a sixth former had a certain personal dignity even in these enlightened days and the thought of Jackman's distasteful habits shot through his mind. End up like him? Oh no! Again the time warp had come in. What seemed like five minutes to Marc was but seconds in the real world and when his eyes unglazed he found that he had been staring back, an acknowledgement in itself. His eyes, however, re-focussed in time to see Seb smile and with the smile his blue eyes twinkled. Marc smiled back and nodded. Honour was satisfied. The Headmaster entered, the School stood and Chapel proceeded.
The first German lesson with Mr Bell was an outline of the course. Marc was one of eight in the class, smaller than the average A-level class at Buckton, but average for a subject which from the third form upwards was an option. They would take the literature component and the first book they were to read was Thomas Mann's Tonio Kröger. Marc had yet to discover the irony of this choice which would lay his heart bare in the pursuit of intellectual excellence as he probed other works by Mann and came to terms with his biography. Fortunately he shared his two modern language classes with his old friend Tom who had opted for history as his third A-level, and so he would have a sounding board for the ideas his reading provoked within him. To begin with he found Tonio Kröger hard going, but a translation was permitted under the proviso that they did not read ahead and spoil the story. In any case he would be spurred on once he discovered that the eponymous hero bore certain characteristics of his own developing situation. The bell ended the double period and the class left for morning break.
Except during inclement weather the boys of Buckton College were encouraged to spend their breaks in the fresh air. Providing they kept off the 1st team's rugby and cricket pitches they had the freedom of the playing fields. The library was open and most popular during the colder days of winter or there was the tuck shop run by Mrs Miggins, the Head Caretaker's wife, and her helpers. The sixth formers naturally had the privilege of remaining in the Sixth Form Centre which had a comfortable common room away from the study areas, but three years of the healthy outdoors had persuaded even them of the benefits of being outside.
Meanwhile in and outside the tuck shop the younger boys were jostling with one another as they moved up the queue. Seb and Daniel had just had their first three lessons at Buckton. Maths, R S and English. They had met first in the house corridor and got chatting. At their previous schools they had both played rugby and cricket, done some acting, Daniel had even sung in the school choir until his voice had broken. They were both outgoing and fun-loving and when they found out that they shared adjacent rooms and would be in the same form, that cemented their friendship. They were joshing one another as small boys do when Seb felt a hand stroking his bottom. He turned his head and found that behind was the revolting Jackman who leered as he turned round. Seb just carried on talking to Daniel and without warning lifted his leg and stamped his shoe down hard on Jackman's foot.
"You’ll pay for that," exclaimed Jackman while trying to suppress the pain. Seb apologised with a smile, but the twinkle in his eyes was noticeably absent while the others in the queue pushed Jackman out with shouts of "Perve" and "Serves you right" and the duty prefect sent him to the back.
"He gives me the creeps," said Daniel.
"The others warned me about him. That’s why I had no hesitation."
The second day of term could have been any day for by now the routine was established. After a full day at school Marc and Tom felt in need of some exercise. They returned to Paxford, dumped their books and got changed into their running kit. They jogged slowly through the school grounds until they reach the playing fields where they opened up and challenged each other to sprint races. They were already feeling the benefit of the oxygen coursing through their arteries and it would help to prepare them for their first rugby match. They ran back to the House, fetched their swimming kit and finished off by doing ten lengths of the pool. Then down to work for the evening, a break for supper and Prayers and the rest of the day was their own. Marc looked first of all at his copy of Tonio Kröger. The German was difficult, more difficult than anything he had tackled so far, but he persevered, then went over to the translation. He only read the first chapter, Tonio Kröger and Hans Hansen at school. He read about the friendship between them although they were poles apart in their interests, but felt that he had missed the point. He would talk to Mr Bell after Prayers.
The boys went off to supper. Afterwards the School moved back to their various houses and Marc and Tom crowded into the day room with the others. Again Marc chose his seat carefully to avoid looking at Seb. Jackman had just lurched in and the juniors were all busy crowding him out so he couldn't sit near them until he ended up for five seconds at most sitting on the lap of another fourth former. Marc felt an inner disgust which by the expression on his face he communicated involuntarily. "Dave, how do you cope?" he asked Dave Lane, the prefect sitting on his other side.
"I don’t. I just try to look after the others." Prayers started and finished. Mr Dalton released them and just as Marc was about to rise from the settee he felt his hair being ruffled.
"Get off, Tom!" Tom, however, was on the other side of the room and as he turned he noticed a blond haired third former smiling at him, his eyes twinkling. Marc simply couldn't be angry with him. His irritation melted immediately and he automatically said "Hello, Seb. So it’s you," in mock despair. "What sort of day have you had?"
"Not bad. Rugby made up for it" and they moved out of the room together.
Marc watched some television and had a game of snooker once the juniors had gone to bed, then returned upstairs to his Tonio Kröger. He wouldn't disturb Mr Bell tonight. When he went to bed that night, he had quite forgotten Jackman and Tonio Kröger. "Funny boy, that Seb. Cheeky for a third former, but you can’t help liking him." Then he fell asleep.

IV

The term was now in full swing and Marc felt stimulated by his new courses. The days grew shorter and cooler and the leaves turned as autumn advanced. Another routine had become established as well: the smile in Chapel and the tousling of his hair upon dismissal from Prayers, to the extent that their omission would have caused more comment than their commission. Monday and Wednesday afternoons were games days for the seniors. Friday afternoon was set aside for the CCF which meant that occasionally an exercise could continue into the weekend. The pay-back for this was two extra lessons after the Monday games session. The sixth form had General Studies so no one escaped with free periods. Saturday meant no lessons, but was set aside for School matches and when these were in the morning the populace could enjoy an even longer weekend. Marc was disappointed not to have been selected for the 1st XV, but this disappointment was assuaged to a certain degree by being invited to captain the 2nd XV. An occasional exeat weekend would be fitted in, especially at times of tiredness and stress such as towards the end of a long term or after exams.
Since moving into the new building Mr Dalton had consciously set a policy of converting Paxford House into Paxford Hotel for two days a week and the régime was relaxed. Rising times and breakfast were voluntary. If you missed school breakfast, you could provide your own as each floor had its own kitchen with refrigerator, microwave oven and utensils. For weekend lunch or supper you had to make a firm commitment to attend or withdraw according to the activities on offer. On Saturday evening the school buses made timetabled journeys into the local market town for cinema or "socialising". The return journey was timed according to your seniority. Sunday saw Chapel at ten, made compulsory by the School for all in residence, after which you could join in or ignore any activities available. The only rule was to make a firm commitment and stick to it. What happened in other houses was probably similar, but fine-tuned by the particular Housemaster.
Marc and Tom established their own routine on Friday evenings when they would invite the members of their mentor groups to cocoa and biscuits in their rooms after Prayers. They knew they would at least have this formal contact, but of course they made themselves readily available when needed and if time permitted would join in games of snooker or ping-pong, or cards or Scrabble, as their own mentors had done with them years before. Another little piece of routine had, however, crept into these mentor meetings. During them Seb would just be part of the group, but he made sure he always left something behind so that after he had changed for bed he could return in his dressing gown to retrieve it. Marc had cottoned on to this, even tried to forecast what the object would be, but on the other hand never reminded Seb of the abandoned artefact before his first exit. He would almost anxiously await the knock twenty to thirty minutes later and pretend he was in the middle of some work for this essay or that dissertation, but would have been sorely disappointed had Seb withdrawn and promised to come back in the morning. And he enjoyed their chats, they both did. Bedtimes were half an hour later on Fridays and Saturdays, but even so he would conduct Seb back to his room to prevent his getting into trouble for being late. Usually Mr Bell was on duty on Fridays which oiled the works. Mentoring had its advantages. Both Mr Dalton and Mr Bell would informally enquire of Marc and Tom how their young charges were progressing and whether there was anything they should know, which gave them a chance to pass on the feelings of the lower echelons in the House so that the staff might keep a finger on the pulse. Not that you can have any secrets in such a close community anyway.
The Saturday before half term the 1st XV was playing away and there was no match for the 2nds. Marc was not required to sub, so he decided he would watch the U14s. He was particularly pleased that three members from his mentor group, Rob, Daniel and Seb, had become regular players in the School team. This boded well for the junior House XV to have the School scrum half, outside half and centre. It was a hard and fast match against St Bridge’s, indeed the School was ten points down at half time, but with the wind behind them and an inspiring captain the pack delivered the backs with more ball which they arduously converted into points. With less than five minutes to go the score was 20 - 25, that is in favour of the visitors, when a surge from the scrum gave Daniel clean ball which he spun out to Seb who zipped it down the line to the right wing. The fullback came up outside giving them the extra man and as the opposition crunch tackled the winger he passed the ball to the fullback to level the score in the corner. It was now up to Seb to convert, difficult for any youngster from just inside the touchline. He carefully placed the ball, measured his run-up and kicked. The ball rose. He had not kicked it far enough to the left. Seb was already running back for the restart, but then a gust of wind made the ball curve slightly in its flight. Seb didn't see this. It hit the right hand upright and dropped. Marc held his breath. Then the touch judges' flags rose in unison to indicate that the ball had passed through the sticks. A cheer went up and the referee blew his whistle for no side. Seb was the hero of the match. The teams exchanged their three cheers and Buckton ran to the side of the pitch to clap off their opponents. As Buckton passed through St Bridge's tunnel Marc managed to slap Seb on the shoulder and in return gained the smile and the twinkling eyes.
Marc helped to clear the flags away and directed the few parents spectating to the pavilion for tea. He thought he would go and congratulate the team, especially his three Paxfordians, and he could hear the healthy jubilation as he approached the changing room. There were high spirits and high jinks. He opened the door and disappeared inside. He blinked through the steam and there was a merry game of pass the jockstrap in progress, each player trying to get rid of it as soon as he was given it. When the intruder was spotted it was thrown to the third former nearest the door who in an act of hubris securely placed the sweaty article over Marc's head with the pouch covering his face. His natural reaction would have been to rip it off, but he could not help but smell it, a combination of detergent, sweat, mud and small boy and instead of finding it revolting the smell had a strange attraction for him which he savoured. The lads thought he was just putting on a brave face to call their bluff, but he wanted to get his fill of the odour. Realising what was going on around him he pulled the jockstrap off his head and looked at the nametape. Fortunately it was comparatively dim in the changing room as he felt the blood rushing to his face in one almighty blush, for what he read there was Seb's name. Playing Mr Cool he scrunched it up and threw it back to Seb, congratulated the team and disappeared back to Paxford.
Marc and Tom went into town that night. Death in Venice was playing at one of the screens in the multiplex and they had been recommended this film as background to their reading of Tonio Kröger. Afterwards they retired to a hostelry, took in a lemonade and a coke (loosely speaking) and caught the last bus back to school.
As Marc lay in bed he could not get the smell of the jockstrap out of his nostrils, nor did he want to. Amazed, he revelled in it and wondered what his reaction would have been, had it been unnamed or someone else's. He thought of Tadzio from the film, he thought of Tonio Kröger and Hans Hansen, and he thought of Seb and himself. Was there a connection? He was prevented from answering his own question by the Sandman.

V

The following Friday afternoon there was no CCF parade. He was pleased all his charges had joined, but while they were doing their basic training he would not see them. Marc was in the Royal Naval section, the nearest he could get to the Royal Marines whose cadets he would have joined, had there been a section. However, today half term began at midday. The luckier pupils were collected, but Marc had to make the journey by train. The saving grace was that Tom's parents gave him a lift into Hereford giving him better connections than the local station. The Indian summer had continued and Marc took his housemaster's advice. He had left his books at school and would get out into the fresh air during this last week of October before the clocks went back and winter really set in. He was looking forward to being re-united with his family. He had a younger sister, Jessica, who attended a local day school and a brother, Ben, who was destined for Buckton in two years' time. He was fond of them both, but particularly missed his little brother who was only eight when Marc went off to boarding school and now aged eleven he was just about to become a human being. He always made a point of sending them each a postcard every week. He would build up a stock in the holidays. The main thing he wanted to do was to get school out of his head. He loved Buckton College, but even he suffered the strains of the hot house society, the closed community, and holidays were a necessary safety valve. This half term had provided more reason than usual to stand back and take stock. The work was demanding and stimulating. He had that ability to shut himself off from those around him and get on with it. Work was not a problem. Sport was the antidote to work. He joined in the occasional debates and sixth form events when time allowed. One thing he regretted was that because of moving into the new boarding house he had had more luggage than usual at the beginning of term and so had left his guitar at home. That would go back after half term. Marc had a mature singing voice. He sang in the school choir whose main task was to lead the singing in Sunday Chapel and appear at the occasional concert.
The week passed too quickly. He had managed to get to London and stayed the night with his cousin, Susan, who was at university. Her flatmates found him rather dishy and Marc played up to it. They took in a play and the next day he did some shopping while Susan was at college, before taking the train home. He still thought of Seb, much as he had done at school, that is before going to sleep. His heart went out to him, he described his feelings as paternal, as brotherly love, but they were different from the fondness he felt for his little brother. He missed the smile and the twinkling eyes and the tousled hair and during the whole week Seb was his only thought of school. "I wonder what he is doing now," he would ask himself and for fear of appearing to himself as bigheaded tried to suppress the thought of "Is he missing me?" and then his thoughts inevitably turned towards his studies of Thomas Mann's works. He never had gone for that talk with Mr Bell.
As Sunday was the appointed day for the return to school Marc's mother and father offered to take him back by car. Since the weather was still warm they would take a picnic, make a detour into the Forest of Dean for lunch, then on to school. Jessica and Ben could see Buckton College and Marc's room, and the family could pay their respects to the Daltons and Mr Bell. The clocks had gone back that weekend and so it was almost dark when the car drew up in front of Paxford House. Marc took his parents to Mr Dalton's study and made his excuses so that he could return to Jessica and Ben. They helped him unpack the car and carry his bits and pieces to his room and then he took them on a tour of the house ending up at Mr Dalton's study. Mother and Father were ready to leave and just as they were going through the front door Mr Bell caught up with them. Marc took the young ones back to the car and after five minutes their parents turned up.
"So you’ve made a good start to the sixth form, I hear," said Father.
"Mr Bell is very pleased with your work," added Mother. "You’re lucky to have a master like that. He’s obviously got you off to a tee."
"We’ll see what we can do about getting you abroad next year. Mr Bell thinks that if you continue as you've started you might try for Cambridge. Anyway, that's something for you to think about, young man," continued Father. Marc was a peculiar mixture. He was well aware of his own abilities, but he possessed such a combination of self-motivation and modesty that he still blushed when he received any praise or appreciation. After a hug and a kiss for all the family they climbed into the car and Marc waved them off as they drove towards the exit.
As he was about to go back into the house, Seb's parents without Seb were coming out of the front door. They recognised Marc from the beginning of term and said hello and were considerate enough to save embarrassment by reminding him who they were.
"Sebastian told us he's in your mentor group," said the Father.
"That’s right."
"He’s settled in really well and won't stop talking about how much you’ve helped him," added his mother. "You’ve got a friend for life there," she said. Marc felt the rush of blood to his face again and hoped that in the dusk no one would notice.
"We must go. Keep up the good work." He wondered what good work exactly, but the thought soon left him. He said goodbye and made his way back to his room. In the letter rack there was a postcard for him. He picked it up and went upstairs. The picture was of Disneyland, the stamp French. Back in his room he read: "Dear Mentor M, we've been on Eurostar to Disneyland - fantastic. Hope you've had a good holiday, too. Thanks for all your help this term. I’ve missed you. Yours S." His heart leapt. No mistaking who this was from and in an emotional moment he was reminded that he too had missed Seb. He just hoped that no one else had read it.
He now wanted to see Seb more than anything else. The card had finally broken down the defences he had built around himself since that first encounter across the aisle of the chapel. He had never pursued Seb. It was always the reverse although he had never played hard to get either, quite the opposite. Thoughts flashed through his mind. Tonio Kröger - he wasn't alone. Others had suffered the pangs of youthful love. Love - this was the first time he had used the word in relation to himself. He loved his parents, his sister and his little brother, but he had never felt possessive. In fact by being family they possessed each other anyway. Death in Venice - but it was an old man and a boy that made it so tawdry, and he had a fleeting thought of Jackman. There were just over two years between him and Seb and in Death in Venice it was clear that such a relationship led to perdition. However, Tonio grew out of it, or rather through it. Jackman - am I becoming like Jackman? That was the unkindest cut of all, but logic told him that Jackman was revolting, promiscuous, out for gratuitous sexual gratification wherever he could find it. Marcknew he was physically and socially poles apart from that Neanderthal and in any case a celibate or platonic relationship had formed between him and Seb, slowly, as if by chance without imposing themselves on one another. What would his fellow sixth formers think of him? Although when he thought about it several of them flirted with older or younger boys as they went up the school and claimed to have regular girl friends at home. He had always shared the general tolerance and understanding which typified Buckton College. Perhaps that's why he had been asked to become a mentor. For the first time in his life he was filled with self-doubt. He needed to talk, but who could he trust to keep it confidential? What should he do now? The answers ranged between going to see the boy now and the proverbial cold shower. He finally lay back on his bed and exhaled a long breath. If it had been light he would have gone for a long, hard run before supper, but it was not wise in the dark. He was starting to calm down. His logical mind carried on the thought process. His attachment to Seb was emotional, paternal he had described it before. He enjoyed his company, liked his tarting. There! That word had finally been said, but his feelings were in no way sexual. On the other hand there had been the incident with the jockstrap which should have disgusted, but in fact delighted him, enhanced when he discovered whose jockstrap it was and with the realisation that he liked the smell of small boy. However, his options for action were restricted for he was suddenly brought back to reality by the bell for supper.
He walked over to supper with Tom and Doug. Although it was safe, they were encourage to move about the grounds in small groups after dark. Marc also valued their company as a return to normality. They had a week's holiday to discuss and he was pleased to join sixth formers from other houses that evening. They still had half a term's rugby to talk about.
Supper had done him some good and he felt his old balanced self again. At Prayers he sat in his usual place on the settee. How conservative schoolboys are. He kept an eye open for the evil Jackman. He knew Seb was behind him, but the ritual demanded that he should ignore him until he felt his hair being ruffled. Anyway, he could hear him talking away to his mates. Prayers came and went. The House was dismissed and there was a rush for the TV room. The day room was almost deserted by the time the ruffling of the hair came.
"How did you get on in France? I liked your card. Thanks a lot."
"I’ve got something for you. It's in my study." Marc followed Seb out of the room, not a care in the world now they were re-united.
Half a term had gone by and he realised he had not yet been in Seb's study. Under the arrangements in the new building there was little need apart from perhaps when he did his three-weekly house duty. Room inspection was in the hands of the Head of House and the prefects when they also made sure that soap and water were regularly applied, but even that was carried out in the floor's washroom. He looked at Seb's poster boards. Mainly pictures of sportsmen, predominantly rugby players, but also Linford Christie and some cricketers. On the board by his bed was a family portrait. Seb had a younger sister and brother like Marc, but in reverse order. His sister was a pretty little girl and she had inherited the same blond hair, smile and twinkling blue eyes. His brother took more after his father. On another board were team photographs, rugby, cricket and cross-country, from his prep school with a centre piece of Seb with another boy, both in white athletics kit, arms round each other's shoulders, the very personification of happiness.
"That’s Guy, my best friend. He won a scholarship to King Edward's. It was taken last term at sports day after we'd won the house relay. Guy ran at number one with me at four. He was also head boy, but I captained the rugby XV and no way would I swap.
"Look. I brought this back from France for you." He handed Marc a flat package. "Go on. Undo it." Amazement had made Marc hesitate. He carefully unwrapped the package and discovered an Asterix book in French. "I thought it might help the A-level work." Marc was taken aback, then went into auto-pilot and gave Seb a hug as he might have done his little brother. He realised what he had done, but it didn't matter. He'd enjoyed it and furthermore Seb responded by putting his arms round him. Marc's moment of introspection was now well in the past. He was back on an even keel.
"That’s wicked. Thank you. That calls for cocoa and biscuits. See you in my study in five minutes." What was he doing? But it was acceptable to take a visit from a member of your mentor group and Marc thought no more of it.
When he had gone along the corridor and reached his study he opened the front cover of Asterix chez les Bretons and inscribed in the corner was: "To M, with gratitude, S"
That night when he went to bed Marc pondered the events of the day, how he had stepped out of one world and into the midst of another. His soul was singing, he realised how lucky he was and while he knew the reason he could not explain it to himself.

VI

There were six weeks of school routine left before the Christmas break. The rugby was going well and Marc made the most of it. Next term would be cross-country, rugby house matches and sevens, but the game was never taken so seriously in the Spring Term which was probably for the better if the weather turned out particularly wet or cold. They also had the use of the indoor nets to prepare for the cricket season. He had looked ahead. Easter was early and he approved of a short Spring Term and a long Summer one.
A week after half term Marc handed in his first German literature essay. It had been an analysis and evaluation of the theme of love in Tonio Kröger. He had enjoyed writing it and had gladly undertaken some extra reading in his research. When Prayers had finished Mr Bell said he could come and fetch his essay if he liked. A quick tousle of the hair and for the first time a return of the compliment and Marc followed Mr Bell out and up to his apartment. Mr Bell sat him down and offered a glass of sherry.
"You know, Marc, I have never read such a mature essay from a lower sixth former. I would be more than happy to receive this standard at the end of the upper sixth. I won’t go along with all of it. You didn't develop Ich liebe das Leben and you did not list your sources. Harpprecht was clearly one as you look at Mann's relationship with his own son."
"I started off with a book called The Four Loves which gave me my insight."
"But the tone of your essay is that you have some experience in these forms of love." Marc blushed. He had seen the book in the school library and on reading the cover become interested, not primarily for any explanation of Tonio Kröger, but for his own situation. He did not think 'problem' for to him it was not a problem. In a less tolerant society it might have been. "Have you ever been in love?" You could rely on Mr Bell to come to the point.
"I don’t know," Marc replied automatically, but immediately thought he had gone too far in opening up. Yet this is what he needed to do and Mr Bell was probably the only one who might understand. He wouldn't expect his parents to. Tom, much as he was his greatest friend, was too straight forward a guy to understand the occasional feelings of turmoil.
"You don’t have to answer that question," Mr Bell went on. Marc felt the genie might be out of the bottle. He had not touched his sherry, but was pleased to now. The two talked about various things going on in the school and the house, which put Marc at ease. He was back on safe ground. Jackman came into the conversation as he had made a nuisance of himself among the third formers, but that was being watched. Marc drank his sherry, left his essay behind so that it could be returned in school, wished Mr Bell good night and decided he wanted to do some guitar practice with Tom. In bed that night he considered the day and knew what the inspiration for his essay had been. It might be hard to produce that standard when they turned to another work and with that he fell asleep.

VII

The term was flying past. Marc and Seb's relationship had developed a sort of normality. That meant they saw each other about the house. The morning and evening rituals continued, accepted by everyone as part of House and School life. The mentor group meetings were also routine with the bonus that Seb would find a reason for returning to Marc's room and they would talk. There was a minor upset when Seb had to be isolated in the Sanatorium with a bout of sickness. Those three days provided an emptiness which was filled by work. Tom sensed that there was something wrong with his friend, in fact knew what it was and jollied him along. The last weekend in November was always an exeat weekend. The boys were free from Friday lunchtime through to six on Sunday. Marc took the train in both directions. At home he was cosseted and given massive doses of TLC, but on the train he had brooded about missing his Friday mentor group meeting. However, once at home he forgot with one exception all about school and took every advantage of home comforts and home cooking. Even Jessica and Ben played up to having big brother at home. Sunday afternoon he was put on the train and collected along with several other Bucktonians from the railway station by the school coach. As he reached his study he found an envelope with a note in it shoved under the door. He opened it. "Dear M, I have something for you. See you after Prayers. Your S". His eyes settled on the "Your S". Was that a misprint for “Yours S”? He didn't dare answer the question. Supper that night seemed interminable and, in a dream, he was not really listening to his friends until he heard Doug say "Marc's in love." It immediately brought him back to the real world. He blushed. With a blush like that he could hardly say no and, strangely, he was not offended by the statement, especially when the others started joshing him about whom he had met over the weekend.
"What’s she like?" Marc pretended to be coy and parried all the mickey-taking. It was a relief, but it did bring the truth to the forefront of his mind and from the way his friend Tom kept out of it Marc suspected he knew who it was he was in love with. Their group left the dining hall and split to return to their various houses. Marc and Tom were by themselves. They stopped in the dark and Marc turned to Tom and said "You know, don’t you?" Tom hesitated and slowly nodded. "How long have you known?"
"Since the time he was in the San." How discreet, even then Tom did not say the name.
"Is there something wrong with me?"
"In the three years I have known you, you were never happier and you've never been a nicer person to know. Most people think it's because you have blossomed in the sixth form. I suppose they're right and I've always let them think that. Your secret is safe with me. If I was going to tell anyone, I'd have done it by now."
Marc put his arm round Tom's shoulder and whispered "Thanks". They quickened their pace back towards Paxford. "You know," said Marc, "Doug's said something I never dared to say to myself. He's right and it's a hell of a relief, but where do I go from here?"
Enlightenment in both senses of the word. Marc had had something made explicit to him and a burden had been removed from his shoulders. It was not long until Prayers. Marc went down with Tom at the last minute. He was playing hard to get and this had given Seb and Daniel the chance of sitting on the settee in the day room. The two seniors turfed them out. They were trying their luck - they knew it - and they took up their normal position behind it. Mr Bell took Prayers that evening. The Daltons had decided to take full advantage of the long weekend and were out. Mr Bell welcomed everyone back, exhorted them to work for the remaining two weeks of term, especially those with trial exams in January. The House was dismissed and Marc felt the customary hand ruffling his hair. With end of term tests prevalent before the last marks order and reports the House had returned in business-like mood and the vast majority disappeared to their own studies to cram for this chemistry test or that geography test before bedtime. So the house appeared almost deserted when Marc left his study and wandered down the corridor to knock on Seb's door. "Password" came the muffled voice from inside.
"Ruffled hair," said Marc. They had never used a password and it was the first thing they had in common that came into his head. The door opened and he was allowed inside. Marc wanted to hug the creature in front of him, but did not dare make the first move. He sat on Seb's bed. Seb meanwhile was undoing his tuckbox from which he produced two slices of cake.
"It was my birthday yesterday."
"Why on earth didn’t you tell me? I could at least have given you a card."
"Not a problem. We were away anyway." If a birthday falls on a normal schoolday it was a great tradition in Paxford to acknowledge it with a cake and also with the bumps which were given in a huge blanket with the house staff and sixth formers on the corners to make sure it was held securely. Seb had missed this with his birthday on exeat Saturday, but on the other hand had been able to celebrate at home with his family. He handed a slice of cake to Marc who wished him many happy returns and asked him about his presents. "A new watch," and he brandished his left wrist to show Marc. He couldn't see it properly so he automatically grasped Seb's hand so he could take a closer look. It was the latest combined digital and analogue model with timers and calculators, everything but the kitchen sink. Marc was genuinely interested and so it was more than a minute before he realised he was holding Seb's hand and furthermore Seb had tightened his grip on Marc's. It slowly dawned on Marc that apart from the occasional return of hair-ruffling or sporting pat on the back this was the first time he had deliberately and consciously held him even though Seb had touched him every night after Prayers. It was a lingering moment in which Seb placed his right hand on top and started to stroke the back. It was strange how the junior appeared to be the more experienced and leading the advances and Marc felt his palm being tickled by one of Seb's fingers. "You don’t realise, Seb, how fond I've grown of you."
"I think I do. I've adored you since the first day of term, but I had to make you notice me. I didn't even know your name and I was afraid to ask, but you made it easy for me in Chapel. You were looking at me and all I had to do was smile. We were hooked, but I had to make sure and so I tested you by ruffling your hair at Prayers that evening. You didn't hit me or tell me off, so that was it. When I heard that you were going to be my mentor that was the icing on the cake," and he lifted up a piece of icing from his birthday cake and popped it into his mouth.
Marc was gobsmacked. He could scarcely believe what he had just heard. It had taken him until today to understand about himself what had been obvious to this 13, no, 14 year old. It was Seb's bedtime and he couldn't encourage him to get into trouble. He expressed his gratitude and in recognition of what he had just been told wrapped his arms round him momentarily and disappeared to his study. The note he carefully placed inside the Asterix volume. Marc was ready for bed himself. He cleaned his teeth and changed, then climbed under the duvet before switching off the light. "What a day it’s been. What do I do now? I’m hooked. We’re hooked. I’m enjoying it, Seb's enjoying it, it's not harming my work. Indeed it gave me that high mark for the lit essay, and then there was that incident with the jockstrap.…" Sleep interrupted his chain of thoughts there.

VIII

Marc had a free period Monday morning which gave him a chance to run down to the village stores. He bought a birthday card and the largest bar of chocolate they had in stock. He had time to return to his study, wrap up the chocolate and write the card. "To my dearest S, I'm sorry it's late, but it won't be next time. Many happy returns. With all my fondness and love, Your M." He had written "fondness and love" as he would have done in a card to his family before realising what he had done and when he came to think it over he couldn't cross it out without making a mess of the card, and when he thought about it a little more he didn't even want to. He stopped himself from adding kisses, though that just served to open up another dimension in his mind. He sat stock still and pondered. He must have spent five minutes in a day dream. He walked along the corridor and asked one of the house domestics if he could put the card and present in Seb's room, then wandered back to the sixth form centre.
Monday afternoon was rugby training. Marc's fitness was at a peak after almost a term. There was not an ounce of fat on him. He was all muscle and sinew and the sixpack had been honed to perfection. Two matches left they worked at their skills for as long as the light allowed, then finished off with fitness in the gym and ten lengths in the swimming pool. It was hard work, but at this end of term he could take it in his stride and although physically tired he felt mentally refreshed when he returned to school for two lessons, then to Paxford for prep. On his desk were four squares of chocolate - nothing else. After Prayers his hair received the customary ruffling and in his ear he could hear a whispered "thank you" and in an even softer voice "I love you, too". The mouth was so close he could not only feel the breath, but the heat from the lips. If he had moved his head slightly they would have touched his ear. Marc blushed not daring to look round and when he finally did, there was no one else in the room. He collapsed across the settee, breathed deeply and experienced three separate sensations: a lightness of heart, a feeling of longing in the pit of his stomach and a heaviness in his loins. Tom came noisily into the room and challenged him to a game of snooker.
In bed that night he didn't know what to think. The three sensations had returned accompanied by a confused feeling in his head. Sleep did not come until he had relieved one of those sensations.

IX

The final days of term rushed by. Of the two rugby matches, one was won, one lost, but during his speech at the rugby dinner the 2nd XV captain had a good season to report and was back on form when it came to giving an appreciation of his players. The Advent Eucharist on the final Sunday always gave spiritual refreshment at a time of general tiredness leading to bad temper. Marc was singing in the choir so he did not have his usual contact in Chapel with Seb, who, as it was Sunday, was dressed in a dark suit which rendered his adolescent beauty immaculate.
Then the last twenty-four hours had arrived. They took the same format year after year. Afternoon lessons would be cancelled in favour of final preparations. High tea was served at four in place of supper. At six the School would put on its Christmas concert. As well as singing in the choir Marc played and sang to his guitar. He had a mellifluous singing voice, interesting as the two songs he had chosen originated from Bob Dylan and Johnny Coppin, neither of whom merited the epithet mellifluous, but at least it lent his presentation some originality. The concert was well attended by parents who would then spend the night at local hostelries and return at noon the following day to take their offspring home. Seb's parents' attendance owed much to his father's being an Old Boy and therefore nostalgia. Marc's mother and father with the other two children at home found it near impossible.
After the concert it was back to the boarding houses for their respective Christmas parties. This year, the upper sixth had decided, it would be in fancy dress and they had given half a term's notice. Marc had not given it much thought, but had persuaded Mr Bell to lend him a gown and mortar board which let him off the hook. As they were ready people gathered in the day room, but the third formers were conspicuous by their absence when with a great deal of row the door opened and two policeman were dragging in an unfortunate convict complete with arrowed suit, hand cuffs and chain and ball. Behind the large moustaches the faces of Rob and Daniel could be spotted, but more interesting was the identity of the obviously unwilling convict, whose slitty eyes and harvest of pustules meant it could only be Jackman. The third form had got its revenge. Jackman made his protestations, but to a body everyone accepted it as part of the act, joined in the mirth, but did absolutely nothing to help the wretched fellow. By the manner in which the remaining third formers paraded in with an array of imaginative costumes, it was clear they had all been needed to apprehend the deserving victim and it had been an incredibly well kept secret. As the remaining procession was wolf-whistled and cheered no one noticed Jackman being escorted to the corner of the room, made to sit on the floor and further handcuffed to a security bar in front of the window, while one of the sofas was slid in front of him.
Marc looked for Seb. He brought up the rear dressed as a ballerina, complete with tutu, wig and make-up and the object for a volley of wolf-whistles. It was interesting to see how many of the boys - in all age groups - had worked out their fantasies by cross-dressing, ranging from the ugly sisters to a buxom young nurse. The party started off with a series of sketches, some funny in their own right, but many in a satirical vein based on incidents at school or in the house during the term. The staff were naturally frequent butts of the humour. Then followed a buffet supper with a punch and finally the House settled down for Christmas carols. Marc and Tom sat on their customary settee, only today Tom had a moustachioed policeman on his lap set off by a ballerina on Marc's, such was the party atmosphere. It was all Marc could do to control himself for not only did he know who was beneath that tutu, but he had what appeared to be a beautiful woman on his lap with extremely shapely legs. He did not know where to put his hands in order to resist temptation. Jackman had been released prior to the buffet to give him time to calm down before he could do any damage. The party ended with a vote of thanks from the Head of House to Mrs Dalton and the domestic staff. Bouquets was handed over to each and after an exchange of further pleasantries Mr Dalton dismissed the House to bed and left the arrangements in the hands of the prefects.
Marc could not resist putting his head round Seb's door to wish him good night. Seb had removed the wig, but not the tutu. Marc went in and closed the door behind him. "You must give me your address for a Christmas card," said Marc.
"I need yours, too." Seb tore two pages out of his rough book. They wrote names, addresses, telephone numbers and e-mail addresses and exchanged. From outside there was a shout of "Ten minutes till lights out".
"Look, Marc, I’ve still got to get this make-up off." Marc was staring at his ruby lips.
"We’ll see each other before we go," he replied and blew a kiss before disappearing through the door. Marc was too exhausted from all that had happened during the day even to try and unravel what was on his mind and as soon as his head hit the pillow he fell asleep.

X

The last day of term had its own routine. After breakfast everyone went over to school to clear up their things there and bring them back to the houses. A final house meeting of term was quickly followed by the Headmaster's assembly in which he he handed out the bouquets, but usually kept any bricks for the following term. However, the headman appeared pleased with what had been achieved, gave the rugby XVs various degrees of praise and encouragement and felt that sufficient work had been done over the term, reminding the School he had yet to see their reports. He finished by wishing staff and pupils a Happy Christmas which the School returned with the traditional cheers led by the Head of School. Straight out to Chapel for the End of Term Service. Since the Choir was used for this Marc would not be in his usual seat. In fact he had had no chance of talking to Seb at all that morning. The final hymn was Lord, Dismiss us with thy Blessing and finally three hundred and seven Bucktonians and their masters were free until the middle of January. Marc made haste to discard his robes and dashed back to Paxford, his one aim not to commit a sin of omission. He reached his landing just in time to see Seb struggling with a heavy case which he was taking downstairs to await the arrival of his father. Marc gave him a hand and as his father had not yet arrived they went back to Seb's study to say goodbye. Both boys felt low and empty, partly from tiredness, the demands of the term and the anticlimax, largely because they knew they would miss one another. Marc had to go to catch the school coach to the station, so he naturally travelled light anyway. They shook each other by the hand, then without further thought put their arms round each other in an affectionate bearhug. They heard footsteps in the corridor and there was Seb's father ready to whisk him away to another world.
"Hallo, you two, had a good term?" Father and son hugged one another and Seb's father shook Marc's hand. "I don’t know if it will help, Marc, but would you like a lift into Hereford? We’ve got room." Marc did not know whether it would speed his travelling arrangements, but it meant a little more time with Seb, so he said yes. Together they loaded the rest of Seb's stuff into the car along with Marc's luggage, joined the queue to say goodbye and thank you to Mr and Mrs Dalton and left in style. Marc had already said a personal goodbye to Mr Bell after breakfast. And so with Marc deposited at the station it was the end of a chapter and with luck on his side within fifteen minutes he was on his way through the countryside on an Inter City 125.
Back at home Marc collapsed, and mentally physically exhausted. Indeed, he tried to put Buckton College completely out of his mind, which except for one point he succeeded in doing. He was pleased to be back with the family and enjoyed the company of his brother and sister. In addition he received a lot of attention as he too had been sorely missed. Christmas shopping had to be done and in one sortie he went to Young's menswear and collected a set of cufflinks he had ordered during the last exeat weekend with the Buckton College shield on them. These were carefully wrapped and along with a Christmas card duly dispatched with all affection by registered post to Seb. Naturally Marc received a card in return. He was not expecting anything else and had hoped that Seb was not expecting the packet he would receive. As he took the Christmas card out of the envelope something slipped out and onto the floor. Marc picked it up. Under the heading Carte Postale was simply written “MxxS, Happy Christmas”. He turned it over to see the picture. On a plain white background was printed in fancy red lettering “Je t’adore”.

XI

Seb too reacted in a similar way back at home. The first two days he spent most of the time sleeping, in the armchair if not in bed, but by the third day he had regained much of his normal fun and vigour, every ounce of which he needed to cope with his brother and sister who greatly missed their elder playmate. He was not so introspective as Marc, but mornings as he lay in bed his thoughts did finally turn to his first term at Buckton.
The previous morning his school report had dropped through the letter box, although he had to await his father's return home in the evening to discover the contents. It contained nothing for him to worry about. Quite the opposite. It was probably the best academic report he had ever received. At his prep school the teaching had been directed towards gaining prestigious scholarships at the top public schools, and as mentioned before his best friend Guy had been successful in that quarter. If you were not aiming that high it was easy to be pushed into an academic backwater and after all Seb and the school authorities knew that come what may he was destined for Buckton College. At Buckton he had found a different attitude. To begin with the first goal was GCSE in three years' time. Secondly he had been given a certain amount of choice in his subjects, with some new ones. The teaching at Buckton was thorough and effective, more that of the traditional grammar school, and the whole ethos put work as the top priority and this atmosphere permeated by tradition from the upper sixth down to the new third formers. He had been well prepared by his father on what to expect at his new school and for once time had not washed away the old traditions. Buckton suited Seb better than his old school and he thrived on a more grown up establishment. In the sporting world too he had made his mark, gaining his full rugby colours for the U14s. He had been supportive, sociable and a lot of fun in the boarding house. So all in all Seb and his parents had every reason to be delighted at the way he was carrying on the family name and living up to expectations at Buckton.
Furthermore he had found Marc. Seb knew he had made all the running in forming the relationship, but on the other hand from the Beginning of Term Service he was certain that he had met the right person and that once formed their relationship was mutual, firm and loyal. Again he had his father's experience to guide him there, for although he did not know the details, he did know that “Uncle” Peter, his godfather, was a close friend of his father's at Buckton, the families had remained close friends and in reciprocation his father was now godfather to Uncle Peter's oldest boy.
Seb had not seen the arrival of a registered packet. Guessing what it was, his mother had forwarded it straight away to Father Christmas to be opened along with the other family presents. Finally Seb summoned the energy to do his Christmas shopping and send his Christmas cards.
Christmas came. When Seb unwrapped the registered packet, he was straightaway on the phone to Marc. They must have talked for a good hour for apart from the postal correspondence they had not been in contact, although both had been thinking of the other as they lay in bed at night, and in the morning. It had been a kind of self-imposed discipline, but with the arrival of the festive day that discipline had broken down. And so Christmas went, and very quickly too with the wild social rounds each family made, and with them the new year had started.
The Saturday before term was due to begin Marc was sitting with the family over breakfast. By now he was his bright cheerful self again and was feeling relaxed. Jessica and Ben had already started their terms. With the post arrived two identical envelopes, identical stamps and postmarks, different handwriting, one addressed to Marc, one to his parents. Marc did not realise that they had emanated from the same address, but on looking at his, his heart missed a beat when he recognised the handwriting. He refused to tear it open, but forced himself to slit it carefully with a knife. Meanwhile his mother had opened its twin and after reading the contents handed it to Father. When he read what was written Marc could not suppress a blush. "My dearest M, I cannot say how much I have missed you. I’ve thought about you every day. Thank you for those lovely cufflinks. I look forward to wearing them at school. Why I am writing is this. Every year at spring half term we go off skiing and because I had such a good report Mum and Dad asked if I would like to take a friend this year as a reward. Naturally there was only one answer and so I am inviting you to join us. It doesn't matter whether you have skied before or not. You will find that your parents will have a formal invitation from mine." Marc looked up. Father was still reading. “I hope you will be able to say yes. Do let me know as soon as possible. See you next week. Your affectionate S”
Mother and Father were giving each other meaningful glances. Marc started to explain the letter he had received.
"Can I?" he said. Father and Mother exchanged more knowing glances. There was no need for discussion. They knew when they were in agreement.
"Well," said his father, "if your mother thinks it's all right. You had better ask her." Meanwhile Jessica and Ben were making all sorts of envious noises.
"I suppose so, Marc," she said, "but we’ll miss you," she added with that little bit of moral blackmail of which only mothers are capable. "You’d better go and phone Seb now and we'll write a formal reply and send it off this weekend." Marc needed no second telling. He was off to the phone, a spring in his step.

XII

Seb was looking forward to returning to Buckton College. He had enjoyed the Christmas break and had fully recovered from the rigours of the previous term. However, with the new year celebrations over life had become dull as it can be during January and February and in general he had always felt that his life lay more at school than at home. Father insisted on taking him back in the car. This was pure nostalgia, for apart from the summer holidays he had always taken the train to and from his prep school. When they arrived in Herefordshire it was a cold, dank and overcast day with patches of snow which had so far beaten the thaw. In contrast Paxford House was warm and brightly lit. Seb took his father in to see Mr Dalton briefly, then they carried his luggage up to his study. The luggage included a large tuckbox on which Father's name could still clearly be seen under a coat of paint, while Seb's adorned the present topcoat. With everything in place they went back to the car, said goodbye and Father motored off. Away from the family Seb was in a different world, but equally at home. He jauntily toddled off, enquired whether the school coach had arrived from the station and as it hadn't he went to look for a snooker partner. There in the games room was only one other person, Jackman, looking his normal revolting self with a particularly large boil on his neck. His slitty eyes lit up like a Chinese lantern when he saw Seb on his own. The lecherous grin did not scare Seb. It just made him feel sick.
"Hallo, Theb. I’ve been waiting for you all Chwistmas. Come here and let me stwoke you."
"The only stroke you'll get from me is a heart attack." Jackman made his advance, but Seb was quicker and out of the door. Slamming it behind him, he noticed the key on the outside and turned it locking Jackman in. There were thumps on the door and shouts of "I’ll have your twousers off for this." Seb kindly left the key in the door and wandered off to the day room just in time to see the school coach draw up outside Paxford. He was only looking for one person and on seeing him, in order not to make things too obvious, he wandered up to his room, left the door open and listened for footsteps along the corridor. After five minutes they duly came accompanied by the voices of Tom and Marc. Again he displayed some discretion until he heard them part and two doors close and only then did he pad his way along to Marc's room.
He tapped out their private knock and Marc opened the door. Marc took him in, the door closed and they hugged each other as if they had been separated for years. Indeed tears welled up in both their eyes. They stood back, looked at one another and began speaking at once. They drew breath and sat down, Seb in a chair and Marc on his bed. They talked about the holidays, but much more about the coming skiing trip. Marc had brought back his skiing kit as he knew he would not go home before then. The bell for supper rang and the two were brought back into the reality of boarding school life. As they passed the duty prefect on their way out Seb casually mentioned he thought that Jackman was down in the basement playing snooker.
"What was that all about?" enquired Marc. Seb told him and Marc went red, but this time he was not blushing.

XIII

The Spring Term soon got into its stride. Games were limited, not by the snow which had since cleared, but by the interminable rain which made the fields unplayable. However, cross-country was available over the surrounding farms and through the country lanes. Both Seb and Marc enjoyed cross-country, having the stamina and right physiques to do well. The indoor facilities were limited until the new sports hall had been completed, due for the new school year in September, but basketball or five-a-side could be played in the gym and there was the adjacent fitness room. Marc had been put in charge of training the juniors for the House rugby competition which would be held in the second half of term. The juniors consisted of the third and fourth form. He was sorry Jackman slipped out of nearly every practice for one reason or another, as he wanted to give him a hard time. On the other hand the atmosphere was healthier without him.
The relationship between Marc and Seb continued to develop. They could hardly avoid each other in the House, while at school, apart from Chapel, they rarely came across one another even in the corridors. The relationship apparently aroused no comment. The little rituals continued, the smile, the tousled hair, the forgotten object. Life had established a normality. The Spring Term was considered a time for work. Those with public exams had taken their trials immediately on return from Christmas. The boarding régime permitted three sessions a day which while pressurised did allow for normal teaching to be resumed quickly. During that time the House was run by the lower sixth.
One Thursday evening at the beginning of February Marc was on House duty. As with everything else he was conscientious. He had just made sure the fifths had gone to bed. With everyone in their own room changed for bed bedtime was like lock-up. No wandering around or music was allowed, but the individual once in his room for the night was left to put out his own lights. A system had been built into the new house whereby the individual rooms' switches could be overridden, but while the threat was always there, it had never been used. The key remained with the member of staff on duty.
The House was quiet. The day room was empty, as were the library, television room, kitchens and games room. The sixth form common room was left to its own devices. Marc wandered around all the landings, took down a "Beware of the Perve!" notice sellotaped to Jackman's door and was just returning to his own study when he noticed a light on in the shower room. He went in and heard the shower running, wondering who had been careless enough to leave it on. He opened the cabinet door just about to turn the water off when he was confronted by Seb. Stark naked he turned towards Marc, made no attempt to grab his towel and looked up at him with a smile and a twinkle of the eyes. How could Marc be cross with him? It was the first time he had seen him undressed and he could not take his eyes off him. The pectorals and the developing sixpack were sheer perfection. Marc took the towel and started drying him, much as he might have done with his little brother years ago at home and said, "You'd better hurry off to bed now. You're rather late." This was a bit of an understatement regarding a third former. They said good night and Marc disappeared off to his room before reporting to Mr Bell who was the master on duty that night. He could now turn in himself. As he lay in bed he had a contented smile on his face and whispered "Just wait until tomorrow."
Tomorrow was mentor meeting day, Friday. Marc thoroughly enjoyed this responsibility and none of the members of his group suffered because of his relationship with Seb. Quite the opposite. It was probably Seb who suffered a little because while their friendship was no secret, through hypercompensation the others gained a better deal, although they did not have the benefit of the 'extra coaching'. The group got on well together and with Marc, in fact like Seb, but to a lesser degree they adored him, and would have done anything for him. Tom had a similar relationship with his group.
Anyway, tonight Seb had left his handkerchief behind. There it was stuffed down the side of an armchair. He had brought a bar of chocolate along to share with Marc. A peace offering? Unnecessary. Marc was just about to say something when Seb piped in with "Not bad timing, eh?" Marc looked confused. "Last night, in the shower. You're such a creature of routine."
"So it was all planned. I suspected as much."
"You don't mind, do you?"
"I don't know what to say. I must admit I admire your pectorals and your sixpack - nearly as good as mine."
"Go on. Show me."
"We’re talking about you," retorted Marc.
"But you didn't mind, did you?"
Marc stretched out on his bed, exhaled and said "I've had a fight with myself, but I've got to say it was a most marvellous experience and shows you must have one hundred per cent faith in me." Seb thought for moment.
"I'm not quite sure what you mean, but I think you must be right."
"Go on. It's long past your bedtime and I need my beauty sleep if I’m to keep up with you." Seb disappeared and Marc changed for bed. Little did he know that Seb had now set himself the challenge of seeing Marc naked. As he lay there he thought "What’s going on inside me?" He had that feeling in the pit of his stomach again.

XIV

Half term was approaching fast. There was turmoil inside him and he needed some time to himself to think. In this case he did not even think he could discuss it with Mr Bell, but he just needed some space, some distance. But there again, perhaps Mr Bell could help. Marc had set the weekend aside for work. Otherwise he had nothing planned. So after breakfast he went to Mr Bell's room. Fortunately he was there. Mr Bell spotted immediately that Marc was not his normal self, but he let him talk. Even Marc did not know how to begin. He was rarely emotional. Finally he started with the bland "I need some help."
Mr Bell was a good listener and too experienced to put words into anyone's mouth. "Go on."
"It's not work," said Marc as if to reassure Mr Bell. "It's just that I need to do some thinking and I can't do that with people around me." Mr Bell's look acknowledged that he was listening, but otherwise he said nothing. He realised that something was wrong as Marc was acting out of character. He was also trying to think of a positive way to help. "You know how much I love school, but at the moment it's so oppressive."
"Is school oppressive or is it people?" Mr Bell was indeed a wise old bird. Marc's silence answered the question for him. The silence continued, however, and Marc could see that Mr Bell was deep in thought. It was the look he had on his face in class on the rare occasions he was asked a question he could not immediately answer. Marc knew better than to interrupt. It must have taken five minutes at least before Mr Bell came out with "I’ve got an idea, but…" Marc waited for the 'but'. "… I’m going to have to convince Mr Dalton first." That would probably not be a problem. Mr Bell and Mr Dalton had worked together for years and he valued the work and advice of his deputy. As Marc's birthday was in August he was young for the lower sixth, but respected by the staff for his maturity. At sixteen he could legally look after himself. "What I'm thinking about is this. You might know I have got a cottage a few miles from here. It's my bolt-hole when I need to escape. There's one drawback. It won't be heated until I can get there. What I suggest is that you pack a few things and I'll take you across in the car. We'll stop at the village shop as you will need some food. There's not a chippy just round the corner, but if you're prepared to rough it overnight you can stay there and I'll pick you up tomorrow afternoon or early evening. I'll phone before I leave." Marc's jaw dropped. Mr Bell had always been good to him, but he had not expected anything like this. "Go and pack on the assumption Mr Dalton says yes, but don't be disappointed if he says no. Okay?" Marc was speechless, but he managed to nod, his mouth still open.
Marc went off to pack. Mr Bell went off to see Mr Dalton. Mr Dalton was on duty that day, so he had time to listen. In fact his only objection was whether Mr Bell was concerned about the security of his cottage to which he said it was more secure with someone staying there than otherwise. Mr Bell made his way up to Marc's room to give him the good news. Marc had packed some warm clothes, his CCF sleeping bag, some bits and pieces from his tuckbox and took his guitar. He purposely left his work behind as he felt he could not do it justice in the mood he was in, but took the Harry Potter book his sister had given him for Christmas. Fortunately there was no one around when he climbed into Mr Bell's Volvo and sped off, first to the village stores. Within the hour they had reached the single storey cottage set in its own garden.
Meanwhile Seb had gone along to Marc's room and was surprised not to find him there. He went off to find a snooker partner.
Mr Bell opened the front door, picked up some junk mail and went directly to switch on the central heating. He showed Marc round the cottage and helped him stow his stuff in the spare room.
"Just one thing I ask of you, to respect my study and my bedroom, otherwise you have the freedom of the house. There'll be plenty of hot water soon. Any emergency, give me a ring. I shan't be very far this weekend, probably squatting behind a pile of exercise books." He wished Marc a pleasant stay, left him a set of keys and jumped into his Volvo and motored off.
Marc was alone. His earlier confusion had been overtaken by events. He returned to his bedroom, took off his shoes, wrapped himself in his sleeping bag and promptly fell asleep.

* * *

Marc woke about two o'clock. He felt physically recovered, but mentally exhausted and emotionally drained. The cottage had now warmed up a little, though still in his clothes he had sweated profusely tucked up inside his sleeping bag. He had brought his sports kit with him for he knew that there was nothing better than physical exertion when he felt like this. He took off his clothes and slipped on his running shorts and singlet, and over that he wore a sweatshirt, Buckton College and the school crest emblazoned on the front. He put his shoes on outside, locked up, pinned the key safely to his singlet and jogged off. Only now did it occur to him that he hadn't the slightest idea where he was or where he was going. He just took in the surroundings to get his bearings. A milky sun helped him find south-west. He needed all his concentration in order to find his way back and this kept his mind off Seb. After five minutes he came to the local village. He noted its name for now he could return to Bell Cottage, should he get lost, by asking the way to the village. The terrain was rolling countryside and on the other side of the village he found a public footpath going up a hill of pastureland. He skipped over the stile and on soft ground with the gradient against him he started to sprint. His body was working well. Christmas had inevitably taken the edge off his fitness, but almost four weeks into term it had returned and although he was putting everything into his running, his recovery rate was quick. At the top of the hill he stopped to augment his workout with press-ups when another runner, a couple of years or so older, caught him up. They got into conversation and Marc explained he had no idea where he was going. The other harrier saw the Buckton College sweatshirt and asked him if he knew Mr Bell. "That’s where I'm staying," replied Marc.
"My name's Jack and my father's landlord of The Old Spot. We quite often see Mr Bell when he's not at school. Nice chap." Marc was amazed at how small the world was. "Can you manage five more miles?" Marc was more than keen. "Then you can run alongside me and I’ll take you back to the village." He soon found that it was quite a challenge keeping up with Jack, but he was not going to lag behind. The downhill parts they jogged while going uphill at a sprint. Jack would do press-ups and sit-ups as Marc followed up the hill and the concentration on the running meant there was not time for thinking. Jack was as good as his word and they arrived back at The Old Spot. Marc thanked him for the workout. Jack explained that he was representing the county in the U21s event the following weekend and was grateful for someone to run against. When Marc heard his standard he was not so disappointed with himself. They shook hands and parted and after five minutes Marc was taking off his trainers before going indoors. He took a long relaxing bath and finally just wearing a clean tracksuit turned the television on, slumped into an armchair and immediately fell into another slumber.
When he awoke he felt hungry and realised he had not eaten since breakfast. He went into the kitchen, delved into his box of supplies and made himself two bacon butties, dripping with tomato sauce and butter. He then sat down and watched Big Break. He felt a great deal better than he had done in the morning. He knew he still had to think, but it was not the right time. The cottage was really warm now, so between television programmes and dozing he read some Harry Potter. He was enjoying the solitude. The run and solitude were exactly the right antidote. At ten o'clock it all became too much for him, so he retired to his bedroom, slipped into shorts and tee shirt, curled himself up in the sleeping bag and fell asleep straight away.
It was eight o'clock and light when he came to. He leapt out of bed after sleeping solidly through ten hours. Again he put on his running kit and took the same route as yesterday. He had no difficulty finding it and this time ran steadily, as fast as he could.
On returning through the village he noticed the Communion service at 10.30. That would put him in the right mood for what he still had to do - think. After a quick shower he got himself breakfast, and having no dark suit with him thought the Lord would have to accept him in what clothes he had.
The sermon made him even more thoughtful. It started with the love of God for every human being, even sinners. It covered all aspects of love and reminded him of his general reading for Tonio Kröger, argued that in order to love you must love yourself as much as God loves you and before returning to the love of God it warned against spurning any genuine love. Marc had listened to every word and in a daze walked out into a bright February day of blue sky and sunlight. He returned to Bell Cottage with an inkling of the way forward.
He sat back on a garden bench situated in a sheltered and sunlit nook with his hands folded on his head. His eyes glazed as his brain got into gear. This was the first time all weekend that he had really thought of Seb. He could face the idea now. The key to it all was love, and that need not mean sexual love. After all his feelings towards the boy had by and large been paternal and fraternal, but he was attracted to him. He was attracted to him physically, by his appearance, by his nature, by his character. He had put his arms round him and hugged him. Or had he cuddled him? Did this make him gay? If it did, did it matter? If it meant being like Jackman, it did matter. And then he came to the final answer of all, the one provided by the sermon. The boy loved him. He had told him so. He had written it. He had done almost everything in his power to be in his company. He had undertaken some strange ways of attracting attention to prove it. This was the boy's love for him and he had a responsibility to return it, to requite it. QED. He had solved the problem. Now he could enjoy life again. Furthermore he could look forward to his skiing trip at half term.
Feeling that much lighter Marc decided to try his luck and seek out a spot of Sunday lunch at The Old Spot. Jack was helping his father out, so he had someone to talk to while digging in to the traditional roast beef and Yorkshire pudding.
Marc walked back to the cottage, settled down in the armchair to read Harry Potter and dozed off until the phone rang just after six. Mr Bell was on his way over to collect him. Marc hurriedly collected his things together, tidied up the rooms he had used and was ready to leave when Mr Bell let himself in. In the car on the way back they chatted. Marc told him how he had spent the weekend. Finally Mr Bell popped the question.
"Have you sorted yourself out?"
"Yes, I just needed some sleep."
"Was it about a certain third former?" Marc blushed. How did he know? Mr Bell did not say much, but then he did not miss much, either.
"You know then?"
"I know."
"Am I making a fool of myself?"
"Not in the least. You’re not the first to fall in love and you won't be the last. Just ride it, enjoy it. You can give a lot of pleasure in this world and by the way he's been stomping round the House like a bear with a sore head this weekend. You can rely on me to be discreet."
They arrived back at Paxford. With profuse thanks Marc took his things up to his room. Mr Bell had even saved him some supper and left it in his study. Marc took a plain postcard and wrote: "My dearest S, I’m back. Cocoa after Prayers? Your M" and slipped it quietly under his door.

XV

Finally half term had arrived. For the past two weeks Marc had really been looking forward to going skiing. He had skied before, but not as regularly as Seb's family who went every year. As was usual school finished at midday on the Friday. Marc would be taken home with Seb. They would leave early on Saturday morning and arrive back late the following Saturday, in time to return to school on the Sunday. Marc already knew Seb's parents and such was the modern world that they invited him to call them Tony and Margaret. They made him feel really welcome and said he was under strict orders not to be a guest, but to act as one of the family. The way the three children treated him, it was hard to do otherwise. The following morning they had to be up early to load all their kit into the family's personnel carrier in order to arrive at Luton Airport for a 7am check-in. From there a flight to Munich and coach through southern Bavaria, across the frontier into the Austrian Tyrol and finally to Maurach, a skiing resort at one end of the Achensee. The choice of resort had a bonus. Not only could Marc use his German, but Seb too who was in his first year of the language.
It was about four in the afternoon when they arrived. The sun was near the horizon, but before they could unpack and relax there were things to do. They unloaded their luggage from the coach. The hotel was modern and situated next to the Rofanbahn, the cable car.
Talking to Seb and Marc Tony said, "I hope you two don't mind, but they've just told us there's not enough room for us all in the family suite, so you're down the road in an outhouse, but your meals are in the main restaurant with us." There was mock despair from Seb. "Leave your luggage in the foyer. We'll take it down later. The main thing is to get kitted out tonight." The courier took the whole party down into the village where they were kitted out with skis, sticks and boots, which they took back and locked up in the basement of the main hotel. That done they had a little time to themselves until dinner at eight. Margaret took Adam and Elizabeth, the siblings, to unpack while Tony took the older lads with their luggage down to the extension. Marc had been an instant success with Elly who took every opportunity to play with him and hold his hand when they were walking along. The extension was just as modern as the hotel and even bore its name. It had the advantage of containing the indoor swimming pool, sauna and fitness room. The lads were in clover. They reached their room on the first floor and took their luggage in. It was a twin bedded room with a balcony and private facilities and a view over the lake. Tony left them with a reminder about dinner at eight.
Marc and Seb unpacked and got themselves showered and changed. Time had passed quickly and they realised they would have to hurry if they were to meet the family on time. It had started to snow, so they put on their anoraks and snowboots to climb the hundred yards (whoops! metres) to the main hotel. Elly insisted that Marc sat next to her. She had decided she was going to look after him and as with his own sister he gave in. He sat with Seb and Adam opposite him. He was amazed how different Adam was from from his brother, but could see the family likeness. He would take some getting to know over the week, he felt.
The meal started with a steaming soup with a white dumpling in it. They were happy to tuck in. It had been a long day. While they were eating Tony organised the family: breakfast at eight sharp, packed lunches, and dinner at seven. When the meal was over, he suggested an early night for all. Marc and Seb went back through the snow. It was quite thick by now. They got changed for bed, tried to read, but were overcome by the strains and stresses of the day. The light was out by ten and they were fast asleep.

XVI

It was Sunday. They were woken by the tolling of the church bell. Marc looked at his watch. Seven o'clock. He climbed out of bed and drew back the curtains. Overnight there had been a heavy fall of snow. The roads and pavements were already being cleared. The compensation was that the sky had completely cleared and the sun was already shining from the other side of the mountain. Marc showered and shaved. He put on his thermal underwear, long johns and all, another tee shirt and finally his salopettes. Seb too put on a set of thermals and over this he zipped up his Goretex and Lycra ski suit. It stretched and shrank to give a form-hugging fit and Marc could do nothing but sit on the bed watching him. Seb was pleased it still fitted him for a second year. The streamlining effect just added to Seb's beauty as it hugged his chest, bottom, hips and thighs. Marc stroked him on the bottom in appreciation. They packed gloves, goggles, hat and a further anorak in their rucksacks, put on their snow boots and cheerfully made their way up to join the family.
The early night had transformed the family and increased the noise over breakfast. By half past eight they were ready to put on their ski boots, collect their skis and join the queue for the Rofanbahn. The cable car which was situated right by the hotel would take them up to the pistes for their first day. They had a pass for all the lifts. Just as they got to the head of the queue, the man in charge arbitrarily divided the family as his clicker told him the lift was full. So Marc stayed at the bottom with Adam to wait for the next one. It gave him a chance to get to know him for when they were all together he had been entirely occupied with Seb or by Elly.
Adam was due to go to Buckton College in eighteen months' time. "You’ll start with my little brother," said Marc.
"Seb's told me so much about the place. I’m really looking forward to going. You know Dad was there." Marc nodded. "I’m still at prep school, Seb's old school. It's all right, but a bit old fashioned. They want me to do scholarships for the bigger schools, but Dad and I have made up our minds. It's the family tradition." Without the rest of the family Adam really opened up and chatted away. He didn't miss Seb at school. He felt he could be more of an individual rather than Seb's brother. "Seb's really gone on you, Marc. He missed his friend Guy when they changed schools and he's said how much you helped and made up for him." Marc knew what he meant, but he was not in the least concerned. He therefore also inferred that the family as a whole must know about their friendship, and obviously approved. They chatted away. Adam struck Marc as an obviously bright boy, perhaps more introverted and sensitive than his brother. While they were chatting away the lift had come, taken them up to the top station and re-united them with the rest. For the morning they were put into the intermediate class to revise their basic skills. The routine was morning lessons and afternoon free practice. Marc was amazed how quickly it came back. Just remember: "Bend zee knees!"
For lunch they all came down to the top station, bought drinks and consumed their 'lunch packets'. With no wind it was warm in the sun which induced the lads to a little politically incorrect sunbathing. Because of past experience the they were allowed to go off on their own with the proviso that they kept to the marked pistes, while Tony and Margaret looked after Elly. So Seb and Adam took Marc up on the drag lift and down over the moguls which gently introduced them to a little ski-jumping.
At four they met the rest of the family at the top station and asked if they could ski down to the hotel, which they did. At one place a tree grew in the middle of the path, a hazard to be avoided. They arrived safely at the bottom and waited for mother, father and sister and having taken off their skis, as boys do, they started to throw snow at one another. The snowball fight progressed to the point where it was Marc and Adam against Seb who had provoked it in the first place and as they went in for the kill Seb took some snow and rubbed it into Marc's face, and even worse into his hair. This called for drastic action as he made a snowball, he half rugby-tackled Seb, fell on top of him and gained his revenge, but it was not to end there as Seb put his arms round Marc and they wrestled in the snow, laughing, shouting and giggling until Marc finally said "Give in?"
"No way, José," said Seb as they rolled down the gentle slope of the field they were in. They had left Adam behind and as they reached the bottom and had nowhere else to roll Marc realised he was enjoying the embrace and the feeling of dominance, and from Seb's grin and the twinkle in the eye he felt in no way beaten. Marc stood up, let Seb get up, squashed a snowball on his head and ran back up the meadow with Seb in hot pursuit. As they got back to where Adam was guarding the skis and rucksacks, Tony, Margaret and Elly were just leaving the lift station. They shook hands, gave each other a knowing look and walked off with the others as if nothing had happened.
They split up and Marc and Seb went off to the hotel annexe. Despite the exertions of the day instead of showering they picked up their swimming costumes and went down to the heated pool in the basement. They were the only two guests there. They swam a few lengths as they would have done after a games session at school and went and showered off the chlorinated water. A large notice in the changing room pointed the way to the sauna. "Have you ever had a sauna?" asked Seb.
"Never."
"Follow me." Seb took off his Speedo Lycra slip, wrapped a towel round himself and walked in the direction of the notice. Marc followed suit and when they went through the door they peered through the steam and likewise found it empty, not that it would have taken more than four. Seb spread his towel out on the top bench and lay on top of it. Marc put his beside him and sat. There was strong smell of pine. He liked the smell. Seb shook the excess water out of his hair which made the aggregate hiss wildly. Marc lay back with his eyes closed. "You’re a pretty good skier, Marc."
"You’re not so bad yourself," came the reply. He was experiencing that superb combination of a feeling self-righteousness and relaxation after exertion and was enjoying the heat and the steam. In a dreamy state he opened his eyes and noticed that Seb was sitting cross-legged on the bench and obviously taking great pleasure in admiring Marc's body.
Without the least embarrassment he said, "You know this is the first time I've seen you without any clothes on?"
Marc flexed his muscles and tightened his sixpack. "Well, I hope you like what you see," and stood up to pose like the statue of The Thinker, but it gave him ample opportunity to gaze on Seb and reminded him of the time he had taken that late shower at school. Seb was smaller in height than Marc, but that apart he matched up very well. They were both very well put together.
They realised they must have been there for some time. They wrapped their towels round their waists, went back to the changing room, into a quick cold shower and they dressed. At dinner the whole family was in a good mood. Marc and Seb offered to look after Elly on the following afternoon so that Tony and Margaret could do some more adventurous skiing. Elly of course was in seventh heaven, not only being looked after by big brother, but by Marc as well, whom even after this short time she adored. The three boys went off to the skittle alley with the strict injunction to be back by ten.
Five past ten they clocked into the hotel and went up to the family's room. After a quick chat Marc and Seb said good night and wandered back to their room in the annexe. Though physically tired they were mentally wide awake, so they played a few rounds of cards before getting into bed.
They fell asleep instantly. During the night Marc half woke and could remember hearing the village clock strike three. He was feeling particularly warm for stretched out across him was Seb's body fast asleep. Marc put his arms round him and went back to sleep himself. When the alarm rang at seven they were still there entwined in each other's arms. They looked into each other's sleepy eyes. Not a word. The look said all and Marc squeezed Seb and kissed him on the forehead. They lay there for five minutes before climbing out of bed and getting on with the rest of the day.

XVII

Towards eight o'clock they climbed the hill to the main hotel. It was another glorious day for skiing, light blue sky and the sun about to peep over the mountains in the east. Over breakfast they were in a pensive mood to the extent that Margaret asked them if they were all right. "Just tired," they said in chorus, but they knew it was a cover for the real reason. Still, they took the hint, put the previous night's experience behind them temporarily and joined in the general family banter.
This morning's lesson was a revision of Wedeln. Named after the wagging of a dog's tail, it had no translation in English. Once you had mastered the basics on skis this was the one skill which made all-terrain skiing possible and enjoyable. All of them had done it before, although they were rusty, but the real star was Elly. Being the youngest she had the least fears and inhibitions as well as the most supple body and the boys certainly were not going to be beaten by a girlie.
As good as their word, Seb and Marc looked after her for the whole afternoon until the family met again at four at the top station. Every time they went up the drag lift she attached herself to Marc which made it difficult because of the greater weight difference. In fact they fell off twice and had to ski down to the queue again, but Marc was determined to do his best for her and although a strain managed to keep the lift steady. Once that was mastered they took her up the Sessellift and again she insisted on pairing up with Marc each time. Only during a coke stop when she went off to the loo were the boys left alone. They needed that couple of minutes.
"You didn’t mind about last night, did you?" started Seb.
"Did I kick you out?"
"No." They both realised their relationship had taken a great leap forward that night and neither regretted it. "Look," said Seb, "we’ve got to make an excuse and go for a drink somewhere tonight, without Adam. I’ll suggest it’s his turn to look after Elly." Elly was just fitting on her skis again ready to join the boys.
As the family met up again at the top station of the Rofanbahn the boys said they would ski down to the hotel. Elly wanted to come too. "Go on, let her," said Seb. "She’s been superb this afternoon." Tony and Margaret looked at one another and finally said yes.
"Now that means we can ski back to the hotel," said Margaret and the group took off, Adam leading, Elly sandwiched between Seb and Marc and the parents bringing up the rear.
When they reached the main road they removed their skis and walked the few yards to the hotel. Seb managed to corner his father. "Can Marc and I go out for a drink this evening? I need to talk to him without Adam there." Tony and Seb were very close. Adam related more to his mother. He knew that if his son made such an earnest request there was something behind it. Furthermore he had a pretty good idea what.
"Okay," he replied. "I’ll get Adam to look after Elly this evening, but don't make any plans for tomorrow. I’ve booked for us all to go to a Heimatabend."
They had all locked away their boots and skis, when the two boys parted to go and change. "Do you want a drink first?" asked Margaret. "We’re off for coffee and cakes."
"Thanks, but we’re going for a swim and a sauna."
"Can I come too?" shouted Adam.
"Get your swimming things and we’ll meet you at the annexe. You haven't seen our room yet, have you?" Seb was wise enough to know it was better to let him join them now, if they were going out without him in the evening.
They repeated the previous evening's routine, but this time with Adam. Marc had grown used to Seb, but he was a little apprehensive about seeing Adam naked in the sauna. But to his relief, if not surprise too, he did not find him in the least bit interesting. The three boys left the sauna, took a cold shower and got ready for dinner.
The mood at dinner was cheerful which helped Seb and Marc to forget their forthcoming chat. It was only threatened when Adam was asked to look after Elly, not so much by Adam, but by Elly who wanted to be looked after by Marc. Marc promised she would have his undivided attention the following evening and said she was such a marvellous girl she had to be shared and after this afternoon he couldn't possibly hog her to himself any more. Mr Golden Tongue won the day and the family could return to exchanging stories about their afternoon's skiing.
Seb and Marc made their excuses as soon as they could do so politely. Adam wanted to know where they were going. "Just for a coke," answered Seb.
They walked down from the main road into the village. The roads were quiet, but there was obviously a lot of action inside the various hostelries. They picked one, went in and found themselves a quiet …-ish table in the corner away from the locals' table. They sat down opposite one another. It was a cosy corner where they could ignore what was going on around them.
"How’s your German?" said Marc.
"All right," mumbled Seb defensively.
"Have you done cafés and restaurants?"
"Yees…"
"Right. If you can order two beers in German I’ll pay for them. If you use any English, you pay for them."
"You’re on," and they shook hands on it. The waitress came across.
"Grüß Gott, die Herrschaften."
"Zwei Bier, bitte," uttered Seb with confidence.
"Groß oder klein?" Marc indicated large.
"Groß." The waitress went away and eventually came back with two half litre mugs of ice-cold Gösser beer.
"Well done" said Marc and passed Seb a ten euro note across the table. "You ask for the bill, too."
They took a cautious sip of the beer and looked at one another. They knew what they wanted to talk about, but who was going to begin? Marc made it easy. "That was lovely having you next to me in bed last night." Seb blushed and smiled coyly.
"I suppose I should have asked first, but I was scared you would say no."
"I think I would have," said Marc, "and look at what we’d have missed." Seb immediately looked more relaxed. Marc put his hand across the table and held Seb's reassuringly.
"I’ve got to tell you something. Perhaps I should have told you before, but it's hard at school. You're a sixth former, I’m a newbug. At prep school we would never have even spoken, but here it's easier. Mum and Dad told you to be part of the family and you've done just that. In some ways you've been the big brother that I normally am."
They both took another sip of their beer. "You know that picture of Guy and me on the notice board in my study? I said he was my best friend. Well, he was a bit more than that. We were nearly expelled together."
"How was that?"
"We met aged eight when we were new. We were in the same house, the same class, the same teams. We were inseparable. Occasionally we had the mickey taken out of us, but if you are sporty and generally well-liked and perhaps brainy on top you can survive. Aged twelve our voices broke, we grew hair, our bodies changed very quickly and we became more interested in one another until one day during the last year we were found in bed together."
"Were you naked?"
"No, I still had my watch on. We weren't doing anything, anyway. It was almost like a prank. You never did anything in bed, in any case. There were always too many other people around and besides there were always the showers, usually after sport rather than in the house. Anyway, we were hauled before the Head, our parents were brought in and a bit of a fuss made. I say a bit of a fuss, a hell of a fuss. Do you know why we weren’t expelled? What saved us was Guy's scholarship to King Edward's. Not that he would lose it, but because the school would lose the credit if Guy had been kicked out. After all, they couldn't kick me out and not him. After that we were under constant supervision. I was glad to get out. I'm surprised they even allowed that photo to be taken, but they couldn't really stop Dad, I suppose."
"What did your Mum and Dad say?"
"I was scared stiff about what they would say, naturally, but really they were jolly decent. And that's another reason they were keen for me to go to Buckton College."
"Why’s that?"
"When Dad was there as a boy, he had a close friend who was gay. He was openly gay, but he was also a good bloke. Everyone liked him, he was generous and good company, the complete opposite of Jackman, say. And yet the School was wholly tolerant, staff and boys. That impressed Dad. We've talked a lot. We talked with a doctor friend of his who explained a lot about homosexuality. No one chooses to be homosexual. You are or you aren't. I am. Oddly, I had suspected it from about the age of six or seven without knowing anything about it. I knew by the time my voice broke that I was interested in other boys. The sport helped that. Other kids would talk about boobs and fannies. I'd rather look at a picture of Linford Christie and Guy was the same. He was a superb athlete, very good-looking and well developed. We made a good pair.
They stopped, Seb to draw breath, Marc to think. In his mind he went back to his weekend's respite at Mr Bell's cottage. He had succeeded in clearing his mind and without putting it into words he had come to a similar conclusion about himself. Seb's thoughts and attitudes during his growing years had, he realised, been close to his own. Out of the blue after five minutes' silence he looked Seb straight in the eye, held his hand across the table and whispered "Then I must be gay too." He immediately felt a great weight lift from his shoulders, fall from his breast and he added "You’re the first person I’ve ever said that to. And now I can openly add 'I’m in love with you, Seb' without any fear of frightening you." Seb squeezed his hand in recognition and they slumped back into their seats.
Marc suddenly came to, looked at his watch and said to Seb "Time to pay up and go back to the hotel." Seb paid and gave the change to Marc. When they went back outside it was frosty. An almost full moon illuminated the village. The cold returned them to the real world. "Does Adam know about this?" "Oh yes. We were after all at school together."
"What about him? How did he take it?"
"He likes girls. I know where he keeps his girlie mags, and Dad explained a lot of things to him as well. He took it very well."
"And Elly?"
"Not yet. Too young to be told anything about it. No, Dad was very good about the whole thing. He liked Guy. He explained that leaving school would mean we would part all together. He prepared me for that. He warned me about the dangers of promiscuity. I have told him about my feelings towards you and I think that's why he's pleased you're on holiday with us. Mum and Dad can get to know you and they know, to put it in base terms, I'm not doing a Jackman."
Meanwhile they had reached the main hotel. Elly had gone to bed. Tony, Margaret and Adam were sitting downstairs playing cards. They 'reported in' and Tony asked them if they'd like a small beer. They sat together until the beer came when as if on cue Margaret said "Come on, Adam. Time you were in bed. It’ll be another late evening tomorrow," and they said good night and left the three together.
"Did you have a good time?" enquired Tony.
"Yes," they chorused. "We just had a drink and spent the time chatting."
"Everything okay?"
"Fine. We've sorted everything out," and Tony was satisfied. He then started to regale them with stories of the time he was at Buckton and how much harder school life was then than now. Seb realised his bladder hadn't the capacity of nearly a litre of cold beer on a frosty night and wandered out.
"Marc, I gather Sebastian told you some bits about his old school."
"Yes, interesting."
"Are you happy?"
"Yes. It's helped me to clear my mind a bit. He said you were really understanding."
"If you haven't done so already, you'll realise what a great school Buckton is to have behind you. After all these years I still owe it a debt of gratitude."
On Seb's return they drank up, dressed to go back out into the cold and said good night. Back in their own room they got ready for bed. Marc jumped under the duvet, then peeled it back and said to Seb "Come on." They went to sleep in each other's arms.

XVIII

They woke up much as they had gone to sleep, in an embrace. It was another fine day with the sun just managing to come over the mountain tops, except today Marc had a feeling of release in his soul. He no longer felt a need for modesty in front of Seb when he dressed or undressed. Seb had never suffered any such inhibitions. In fact Marc could now sit back, relax and watch while Seb put on or removed his clothes. Seb on the other hand, ever the showman, would put on an act for the delight of his lover and loved one. He made particular play of zipping up or unzipping his body-hugging ski suit. It gave Marc particular pleasure when the zip stuck on his salopettes and Seb came straight out of the shower and released it.
After breakfast with the family, all six took the cable car up to the pistes, followed their lessons through in the morning and after lunch pursued their own interests on the slopes. Marc and Seb went off snowboarding together and while Seb was quite experienced, Marc showed an immediate aptitude and quickly caught up. However, the star of the pistes was really Elly. After three days she had made the greatest progress and along with the confidence gained from skiing down to the hotel instead of using the cable car this meant that the family no longer had to split to attempt the more interesting runs.
Tuesday evening was the night of the Heimatabend. It took place in the Hotel zum goldenen Apostel farther down in the village. After dinner they all dressed up warm against the cold, bright moonlit sky and the frost and cheerfully made their way down the road, Elly making sure she held Marc's hand. He hoped it wouldn't make Seb jealous. When they arrived Marc and Seb looked at one another for this was the same pub they had come out to and where they had opened their hearts to one another only the evening before. Seb was determined to show off and order the drinks again in German.
"The one who orders them pays for them," warned his father. They had been shown into a different room obviously kept for functions. Chairs had been set out and as they were among the early arrivals they could seat the children at the front. The hall soon filled up and it was cosy. The show began. Four men in leather knee trousers, others in leather shorts, accompanied by four women in Dirndls came in whooping and yodelling to music from an accordion. The show carried on with traditional songs and dances including the Holzhackertanz where wood was chopped in time to the music and a dance where the men slapped each other, first on the face and afterwards in acrobatic positions on the backside. Seb could not resist it when volunteers were invited from the audience and he pulled Marc out with him. The performers were impressed when they found the two Englishmen could speak German and took time to teach them one verse of a song. And so the evening went on with zither music, guitar music and accordion music and singing and they all recognised the Harry Lime Theme from Graham Greene's film The Third Man when it was played on the zither. The whole audience joined in the atmosphere of the occasion and when the family left the pub they were all in high spirits.
And so the week went on. If it snowed it always snowed in the evening or at night, leaving a fresh covering for the sunny days that followed. Until the final evening. On the Friday evening there was to be a party in the hotel. It would be attended by the ski instructors and to those who had successfully completed the course a certificate would be awarded. Friday had been a particularly strenuous day, even superfit skier Seb seemed to be struggling at times, for instead of the usual morning lesson the group had been taken cross-country skiing or Langlauf with the new experience of Felle on their skis. Made of sealskin the hairs acted like a cat's fur. Going forward it was smooth and would allow you to glide, while going backwards it would dig into the snow and stop you sliding back. Elly insisted she should come and stuck closely by Marc who over the week had become terribly protective towards her. During the day they climbed to heights they had previously been unable to reach and at about three were all brought safely back to the top station. The children insisted on making their last descent on skis, the parents following, and it was with some sorrow that they took off their skis and boots for the last time and handed them back in at the hire shop.
Marc and Seb made their way back to the annexe. It was the first opportunity they had had to do any shopping. They refused to give up their sauna on the last day, so they gave the swimming pool a miss, went straight into the sauna, showered and dressed for the evening.
Marc wanted to buy something for his own parents and brother and sister, but besides he wanted to show his appreciation to Tony and Margaret who had been so wonderfully kind, generous and understanding. However, most important of all he wanted something for Elly and saw the biggest bar of chocolate he had ever seen - Suchard's Milka.
The two went back with their purchases, first to their room, then on to the main hotel for dinner. The official presentations followed. Marc was proud to receive his certificate, prouder to see Seb gain his and even prouder to see Elly awarded hers. Not only that, but she was given a little posy as an acknowledgement of the special progress she had made and she received a tremendous round of applause. When she came back she sat down and gave Marc a special hug. The party broke up about nine, but the family remained at their table in the hotel. It gave Marc an opportunity to express his gratitude. They then parted as there was packing to be done and an early start in the morning. Breakfast at 6.30, coach at seven. Marc was waiting for Seb who had gone up with his mother to fetch something. Meanwhile he chatted with Tony.
"Well, Marc, you've done very well this week, and not only at skiing. You've made two people very, very happy. Elly won't stop talking about you and I haven't seen Sebastian so content and cheerful for the past year or so. You won't know how much you've done to help us as a family. Both Margaret and I are grateful to you. I remember when we first met at Buckton last September. My intuition told me then there was something special about you." Marc blushed. "That bit we said last week about considering yourself part of the family doesn't end with the holiday. Feel free to visit us or ask for help any time." And Tony put his arm encouragingly round Marc's shoulder. Meanwhile Seb had come back and they were ready to go off to the annexe. They said good night and went out into the cold.
Back in their room they felt the need to relax. After half an hour of doing absolutely nothing they packed their cases and slowly got ready for bed, admiring how suntanned they had become over the week. They were ready to go to bed when Marc announced "Don’t think you're sleeping in my bed tonight." Seb's jaw dropped and he looked close to bursting into tears. "“No way," continued Marc, "I’m coming to sleep in yours!" and with a wicked grin he lifted Seb up and carried him to his bed.
Next morning the coach left for Munich airport on time. In the cold half light the mood of its passengers was naturally subdued. The flight from Munich to Luton was uneventful. The family picked up the space-wagon and headed for home, arriving late afternoon. For Margaret it was a frenzy with the washing machine to get three boys ready for boarding school. Father would take Seb and Marc back to Buckton, while Mother transported Adam to his prep school.
Marc asked if he could ring home. They were all well and had received the postcards. Marc told them how much he had enjoyed himself and that he would give them a longer call when he got back to school. The children rallied round to help Margaret as much as possible. The three boys took a long shopping list down to the local supermarket and on return Seb and Adam took over the kitchen to prepare a meal. They managed a fry-up for six with amazing success. Finally they settled down in front of the television for an hour before deciding on an early night.
Sunday morning was more relaxed. The boys were occupied with packing for school and after an early lunch they parted amid profuse thanks and best wishes for the term. Elly insisted on going with Father so that she could spend as much time as possible with her Marc and she snuggled up to him on the back seat of the people-carrier. Finally they arrived at Buckton. Tony decanted the boys and their luggage and after further farewells they stepped from the warm secure world of the family into the business-like secure world of Paxford House.
It had not gone unnoticed that Marc and Seb had turned up together and that they both sported a suntan among the pale faces that had remained in England. During the excitement and busyness of half term neither had given any thought to the conduct of their relationship back at school. There was no going back, but they did not dare exploit the easy going atmosphere of the school by being too open and in the short time they were taking their luggage upstairs they decided on discretion. After all they had not missed out on each other's company prior to half term. The only difference now was that they had been completely open with one another and each knew what the other thought, and also Marc was no longer a virgin. From his prep school days Seb was only too conscious of the ultimate penalty for offending against the society which, if they fitted in, could and would protect them. They were after all not the first such items in the School's history, nor would they be the last.
With full Pavlovian effect the bell for supper brought them both back to the realities of school.

XIX

With less than a month to go until the Easter holidays there was much to pack into the second half of term. Marc and Seb had both gained parts in the school play, a comedy written specially by the Head of English. House matches on the remaining games afternoons and Saturday mornings involved Marc not only in training the juniors, but in his own place in the House team. However, they were a much needed form of relaxation that counter-balanced the academic demands. Marc's German literature had advanced beyond Thomas Mann to other works, but in revision he could look back at Tonio Kröger and Death in Venice with some insight which made him feel less alone in his situation. The night they returned from half term Marc noticed immediately how the days had lengthened. There was still a glimmer of light at half past six which increased the possibilities outdoors after school. The routine of the smile, the tousled hair and the late Friday visit continued. From the time of their skiing holiday one conclusion the boys had both come to was the admiration for the other's and consequent respect for their own physiques and from this arose the idea of each being the other's fitness coach. It was therefore not uncommon to see the two going for a run or working out in the fitness room after school and before supper. Their mutual encouragement was not confined to matters physical either. Marc took a keen interest in Seb's work and encouraged and helped him whenever he could. Meanwhile the thought of being possible Cambridge material spurred Marc on in his own work and kept Mr Bell on his toes with constant requests for advice.
And so term continued. One Saturday morning had seen a round of House matches played. As the seniors and juniors had played simultaneously Marc could not witness the fruits of his training sessions when the Paxford juniors had scored a victory with an exhibition of set-piece play, a credit to their teamwork. The seniors had won as well, but it had been gruelling work and score line apart of little personal satisfaction to the players. The afternoon therefore left all three hundred and seven Bucktonians free to their own devices. Many confined themselves to the boarding houses brought to their knees by the morning's events.
Marc and Seb, however, were feeling the benefit of their fitness régime and decided they would go down to the squash courts. Ever since the incident with the jockstrap the previous term Marc had discovered that the smell of a changing room, rather than being repugnant, would turn him on and after its use that morning the smell was particularly pungent. As he got changed he breathed deeply. He hurriedly put on his jockstrap and shorts for as he inhaled he could feel a heaviness spreading to his loins. Fortunately they had the changing room to themselves. Seb just continued getting changed and it was not until the pair stepped into the light of the court that Marc really noticed Seb. The exertions of the past few weeks had visibly developed his body to the extent that although he had maintained his slim figure his torso was stretching the tolerances of his white kit. He was wearing a cricket shirt so tight that it was incapable of hiding his nipples and sixpack. The shirt was not properly tucked in and had risen up leaving in full view his PE shorts. Elasticated top and narrow cut to just above the knee they clearly showed the outline front and back of his jockstrap, but as if the front were not enough what really turned Marc on now was the sight of the two straps across Seb's tiny buttocks. Marc could not concentrate on his game. Seb knew why and exploited it by bending in front of him, turning and smiling. It ruined Marc's game. Normally Seb would put up a fight, with Marc winning with very little difficulty. This afternoon Marc's concentration had again returned to the U14s rugby match in the autumn. Marc hauled one game back, but after a thorough hiding they called it a day and left the court to shower. They stripped off their clothes and immediately Marc grabbed Seb's jockstrap, folded it up carefully and placed it over his nose breathing deeply. It was sheer aromatic heaven. When he had had his fill he handed it back to Seb, much as he had done all those months ago. Nothing seemed to make Seb lose his cool and they disappeared into the shower as if nothing had happened.

XX

As it was public knowledge that Marc and Seb had been skiing together at half term, few eyebrows were raised when they were seen together frequently about the school. The only person who seemed to take umbrage was Jackman. He would cast his lecherous eyes on both of them and so their friendship also became a form of mutual defence. The junior House rugby team did not let Marc and Tom down and in fact won all five of their matches. Indeed, as the seniors lost one and drew one it was the juniors who could be thanked for bringing the cup to Paxford. The school play was performed on the last two evenings of term. It was a social occasion not only for the parents, but for the local community who were always encouraged to come on the first night, as naturally more parents came to the second performance. Marc's parents had managed to get away to see him perform and Seb's would never miss such an occasion. Afterwards Mr and Mrs Dalton always laid on a buffet supper as the opportunity for parents to meet one another were few and far between.
When Marc and Seb had changed and freed themselves from their greasepaint they went to search out their mothers and fathers and were pleased to see they did not have far to look, for there they were seated in a corner together. They greeted their own parents, Marc said hallo to Tony and Margaret and was keen to introduce Seb to his father and mother. They had already been talking about the Austrian skiing holiday and what an impression Marc had made on young Elly. It was also nice to hear that both families had put up at The Old Spot for the night. They were sure they would have a drink together when they left later on. Marc's parents did the rounds, talking to the Daltons and especially to Mr Bell, who was only too willing to confirm the good term Marc had had. The party broke up gradually and Tony and Margaret said they would see Marc before he went off for Easter.
The boys in the House were very good at helping to clear up after the buffet. Both Marc and Seb still had some packing to do, so they disappeared upstairs. The prefects came round encouraging the younger boys to go to bed, but they knew from their own younger days that the last night of term was different and they had more sense than to spoil the party mood. Finally the noise grew less. Marc knew he had one more job to do. When it was quiet outside, he put his dressing gown on and slipped down the corridor to Seb's room. The signal tapped on the door would ensure a welcome and he went in. They both sat on the bed. Seb had not even begun to get changed. So busy had the end of term been with house matches and rehearsals that they had seen very little of each other alone and certainly had not discussed the coming holidays. Neither had plans to go away. It was a time first to relax and get school out of their systems and secondly to catch up on work that had gone by the board in the past week. Marc was certainly behind with some reading. One thing was sure, they would miss each other sorely, but lived too far apart for a day trip. While they had been talking, Marc's eyes strayed towards the photograph of Seb and Guy after the relay race. He could understand why Seb had fallen for him. For a thirteen year old Guy appeared quite a lusty hunk in his white athletics singlet and shorts.
Marc looked at his watch. "You should be in bed by now, young man."
"Don’t go yet, Marc," and he started to get undressed, slowly and provocatively, a striptease without music which held Marc spellbound. The word modesty had been edited out of Seb's dictionary and everything came off before he put on a tee shirt and shorts and was ready for bed. As he got in, Marc tucked him in and finally gave him a kiss on his forehead, just as he would have done with his own brother and sister, wished him good night and slipped silently out of the room, switching the light off. As Marc lay in bed a great feeling of emptiness came into his heart.
The morning was the usual frenzy of the last day of term, finishing with the End of Term Service at midday. After that they were on holiday. Marc took off his choir robes, rushed back to Paxford to say goodbye to Mr Bell and thank him for his help over the term, and rushed even more to make sure he would not miss Seb, but he could not find him anywhere. His room was empty and so it was with a long face and great disappointment that he took his luggage out to his parents' car for the journey home.
"Aren’t you pleased to be coming home?" his mother asked. "We haven’t seen you since Christmas."
"Of course I am," and he forced a smile as he got into the car. He waved to Tom and his parents as they drove off and he settled down for the long journey, trying with little success to enthuse over the events of the term. In the depths of his self-pity he scarcely noticed that they had pulled up at The Old Spot. "We’ll have a little lunch before we go on home," said his father. "We’ve invited some friends to join us." Marc was hardly in the mood to be sociable until they walked into the lounge and saw who the friends were. It was Tony and Margaret with Seb.
By the time they left a couple of hours later Marc was only slightly on the melancholic side. He had been the life and soul of the party over lunch. He sat next to Seb which meant they could not so surreptitiously touch one another. It just seemed so natural and when the coffee had been served and drunk at least they could say goodbye properly. They made the excuse of going to the toilet and once outside held each other's hand, looked into the other's eyes, then hugged one another. They went back and joined the families and on parting shook hands.

XXI

For both boys the Easter holidays were going to be a time of some emptiness. Both families were kept occupied with various activities, but being the more introspective of the two boys Marc would suffer their being parted more. However, he possessed a strong trait of self-motivation which would keep him on the straight and narrow and he would view his own situation philosophically.
Seb on the other hand would keep himself busy, or rather be kept busy by the family. In fact he visited Guy. They were after all great friends of many years' standing. They knew their close relationship was over. They were just good friends, but they were also able to swap experiences from their own schools and it was of comfort to Seb that Guy had formed his own liaisons at King Edward's. So proud was Seb of wooing Marc that he regaled Guy with the whole story which he listened to rapt. Seb needed Marc as a form of self-fulfilment, he had felt incomplete without someone onto whom he could project his emotions. He had found Marc attractive firstly for his physique, but quickly realised that a strong and mutual emotional bond had formed. He admitted that in the early stages of their relationship he had deliberately led Marc on, but that was only because ironically the younger Seb had more experience in contrast to the naïveté of the older Marc. He had taken him on a voyage of self-discovery which had ended on that Monday night in Maurach over the Austrian beer. Now they had slept together, discovered the almost insignificant pleasures which aroused the other, the smile, the tousled hair, the body perfume, the way they dressed. Seb described his efforts to see his loved one naked, and once successful he had been in no way disappointed. He dwelt on their spiritual union, his own intellectual development furthered by Marc, both encouraged by their determination to work at a corresponding development of their physiques to the extent that Guy was in awe and questioned what might have happened, had he and Seb remained together.
Marc and Seb were constantly telephoning and Marc knew Seb had caught up with Guy. In fact he was pleased rather than jealous. Marc used the holidays to think. Thinking came under the heading of 'work' and with the forthcoming Cambridge application work was an excuse acceptable to the family, particularly as he did not shut himself away in his room, but got on his cycle to go to the local library. In the afternoons he would also cycle alone out into the countryside, park up at a lonely spot and while surveying the landscape continue to think.
Part of his reading at the library had nothing to with his A-levels. It was about his own situation. He did not want to take those books home. The relevant ones were modern in attitude and took a sympathetic approach which encouraged him to be able to live with himself and realise his was not a one-off case. He was comforted by this. In the afternoon he cycled with these thoughts out to the Beacon. He lay there in the grass and pondered them. The past two terms and the present did not worry him in the least. Considering just how uncontrollable hormones can be, he thought he had escaped lightly and kept the rest of his school life in perspective. Although it was yet to arrive, he had no qualms about his term's report. There were never any bombshells like that from Buckton. Had anything been wrong he would have had plenty of warning. What did concern him was the future. He knew how time flew and that it would not be long until another year had passed and he would go off to make his way in the world while Seb remained behind at Buckton College. Here was a problem and at present he could see no solution to it.
It was not long before his report did arrive and it was as splendid and encouraging as the one at Christmas. However, it did give Marc's father a way in to talk to him.
It arrived one Monday morning after Marc's father had left for work. Marc knew he had to wait until his father's return before seeing it, but experienced no impatience. His work was after all one sphere of his life in which he was fully confident. After a lazy weekend Marc gave himself a physically punishing day. He started with a run to and round the local recreation ground, then back home. He cycled off to the leisure centre and swam twenty lengths in the pool. After a light lunch at home he went back to the leisure centre and worked away at the various machines in the gymnasium, partly of course to hone the sixpack of which he was so terribly proud. After his experiences in Maurach it occurred to him for the first time since to use the sauna. He was just about feeling the strains of the day and the steam came at the right time for his aching limbs. No one else was using it which he found a relief. He had naturally felt no qualms about sharing the sauna with Seb, not even when Adam had joined them that one time. He lay back and just enjoyed himself, slipping into that midway stage between waking and sleeping. He had been vaguely aware of the door opening and someone coming in, but otherwise it did not impinge on his consciousness, until he opened his eyes and noticed that the new arrival was none other than Seb. His heart beat noticeably quicker and he said, "Seb, what are you doing here?" He got up from his seat and as he did, he tripped and found himself flat on the floor. The comparative cold of the floor tiles made him feel fully awake.
"Are you all right?" a voice asked him and as he was helped up he saw it was a young man in his twenties with blond hair, but otherwise a complete stranger. Marc blushed and thanked him, realising his error, and to save himself further embarrassment wrapped his towel round and disappeared for a quick cold shower.
Dressed and outside in the fresh air again Marc felt more like his old self, but it played on his mind the way he had mistaken the stranger for Seb. He was grateful he had said no more and that he would probably never see the stranger again.
Over tea he was particularly quiet and this was put down by his mother to the fact that he had had such a strenuous day. He watched a little TV with the family, but it irritated him. So he made his excuses and said he would go up to bed and read.
He did not read. He lay on his bed, still fully clothed, stretched out on his back, his fingers clasped behind his head, and thought. Of course he was thinking of Seb, of himself and of the way his emotions were inextricably bound up with him. He had resigned himself to the fact he would not see, or hear, or even smell him until the middle of April. That was not a problem. There was a knock at the door and his father came in.
"Is everything OK?" Marc did not answer, but smiled at his father for fear of otherwise appearing sulky. "That was a first class report from school." Marc had in the meantime read it. Again he smiled in appreciation of the remark. "Don’t forget, Marc, we still have to fix up for you to go to Germany in the summer, as well as arranging the family holiday. Have a look at these brochures on summer courses and let me know what you think, but we haven't got a lot of time. By the way we haven't discussed this with Jessica and Ben yet, but your mother and I have been thinking about camping in France. What do you think?"
"Different."
"You can book into these campsites that provide a caravan or a tent so you don't have to take your own equipment. We also wondered whether you would like to invite Seb in return for your skiing holiday." Marc's mood changed immediately and noticeably and he couldn't disguise it. He blushed.
"It's all right, Marc. We know how you feel about one another. That night we stayed at The Old Spot we had a long talk with Tony and Margaret, or rather they had a long talk with us." Marc could only listen. He had by now used up his day's ration of embarrassment. "Don’t worry. They've obviously had a lot of experience. Also we liked Seb the moment we set eyes on him and we'd like to invite him to France if you’re in agreement."
Marc heaved a long sigh of relief. Despite being sixteen he felt tears welling up. His father sat down on the bed beside him and put his hand on Marc's shoulder. Marc pulled his father down on top of him and hugged him, his eyes streaming. "Yes, Dad. That'd be great. I’ll tell you how great sometime, but not tonight." His father remained seated on the bed until Marc eventually fell asleep. He kissed him on the forehead and said good night, left just his bedside light on and quietly departed.
When Marc woke it was getting on for one o'clock. He cleaned his teeth, got undressed and went to bed properly. It was coming up to nine when he woke. The sun was shining in a blue sky and all yesterday's clouds had lifted.
Marc was beginning to understand the pain in Tonio Kröger, beginning to understand that pain necessarily counteracted pleasure. It was the Tuesday of Holy Week which meant that from Thursday evening through to the following Tuesday morning the family would all be together for a long bank holiday weekend. Not only was that a source of strength to Marc, but his parents always organised something, which would keep his mind off himself. This year the family had been booked into a hotel in the Peak District which meant a walking weekend. They would drive up on the Friday. It was on Easter Sunday during a whole day trek that Mother drew ahead with Jessica and Ben and father and son could talk. Marc talked about school, how he was enjoying his work and looking forward to trying for Cambridge. He would have to do a lot of reading over the summer holiday which he would fit in around his two trips abroad. The German course had now been booked for the first half of August and the family had fitted in the camping holiday in July. Marc had telephoned Seb and his mother written to Seb's parents. It only needed the official reply. The conversation naturally turned round to Seb and without seeming to pry Marc's father asked the odd question. Marc surprised himself about how open he was and his father listened without comment. As Marc neared the end of his narrative his father put his arm round him and said "Whatever has happened, whatever is happening to you, your mother and I want you to know how proud we are of you, the way you have grown up so much at boarding school and we admire your gift with people and come what may we will always love you and support you."
The family returned home on the evening of the following day. There was a letter waiting from Seb's parents. It gave the go-ahead for the holiday in France. For the remainder of the week Marc was far more settled in his mind. He split the day up between his work, his fitness and his brother and sister. In their own way they had suffered from Marc's introspection at the beginning of the holidays, but all appeared to back to normal. On the Monday Marc packed his luggage, was taken to the station and waved off by mother, sister and brother. He eventually stepped off the school coach mentally and physically prepared to face a long summer term at Buckton College.

XXII

Marc made his way with his luggage up to his room. On his desk was a large envelope, obviously a card which he opened without further ado. It was from all of Seb's family wishing him a happy and successful term, but most heart-warming was the little paragraph signed 'Love Elly' followed by three kisses. Marc decided there and then to add her to the postcard list along with his own brother and sister. However, he knew the important message was that Seb was back in residence and Marc's heart was already beating faster at the prospect of meeting him. He quickly unpacked, changed and took a quick shower to freshen himself up after the long train journey. For appearance's sake he popped across to see whether his mate Tom had returned yet, and felt some relief that he hadn't for now he could go to Seb's room with a clear conscience. He hesitated outside the door and could hear his CD player churning out a disco beat. He knocked their special knock, the CD was turned down and he heard a familiar voice say "If you’re good looking, you can come in." Marc went in to find Seb dressed in a pair of form-hugging 501s and a polo shirt. Marc closed the door behind him and they hugged one another tightly. It had seemed months rather than weeks since the end of term and Marc immediately felt tears welling up in his eyes in a short wave of emotion. The first thing that Marc noticed was that Seb had grown in that short time. His adolescent growth spurt had not only made him taller, but his body appeared even more muscular, bulging out of his clothes, but without an ounce of excess fat.
Seb fetched a couple of cans from his tuckbox and they sat down on the bed together, talking nineteen to the dozen about the Easter holidays. Seb had spent some time each day at the local leisure centre. He did not want to lose the fitness gained during term time and he felt it had helped him overcome the inevitable end of term tiredness. He'd particularly enjoyed swimming and weight training and what had surprised him was that his brother Adam joined in on most days, but he had been good company and a bit of competition had pushed each to new efforts. Marc was pleased he hadn't neglected the physical side, either.
They had scarcely noticed the time until the bell went for supper. Marc and Seb split up and went over to the dining hall with their own contemporaries. Marc was pleased to see Tom and Doug again. Doug had been to America for the holidays while Tom had gone down to Cornwall for a few days to spend time with his cousins. It made Marc's holiday look really dull. The great advantage of the summer term was that the evenings were lighter. It was still light at eight and for the summer term House Prayers were always at nine and bedtimes half an hour later than in the winter. The boys could get out into the grounds once they had finished their prep. It was at Prayers that some of the euphoria of a new term disappeared when Marc caught his first sight of that subhuman Jackman who was trying to induce another fourth former to sit on his lap. The pustules were no better, the hair as lank and greasy as ever, his slitty eyes darting towards everyone's trousers as they came into the room and the new clothes made to look as if they had been put out for Oxfam by the local tramp.
For Marc, Jackman was not just a physical horror, but he had inveigled his way into his consciousness over the past few months. His physical abhorrence apart Jackman tried to behave promiscuously towards every pupil in the school. It mattered not whether he was younger or older. His reputation was known far beyond Paxford House. In fact he was more likely to prey on boys from other houses as he did not have to live with them, but in Paxford he was kept at arms' length and every so often he would get his come-uppance. The previous year in the old house the boys in his dormitory even grouped their beds so that he was isolated in his own corner, but he existed (you could not say co-existed) because of the tolerant atmosphere at Buckton College, whereas in the average boarding school he would either have been expelled or would have suffered physically. Mr Dalton, the Housemaster, and his staff were well aware of Jackman's propensities and were as vigilant as possible, ably aided by the sixth form body, but he had never actually been caught up to any misdemeanours.
Marc agonised over him for two reasons, or more precisely one and that was Seb. Firstly he was afraid Seb might be despoiled by him. He did not know how unlikely that was since Seb had stamped very firmly on Jackman's foot early in his first term. Secondly, since Marc had fallen in love with Seb and discovered his own homosexuality he did not feel he could show any moral superiority, despite the fact that both Seb and he were at the opposite end of the scale from Jackman in the human being stakes, far cleaner and less tacky and their relationship was founded on mutual love and respect. He just shuddered with inward disgust and revulsion whenever he saw him.
As was customary Marc was sitting on the settee. As the house staff came in everyone stood. Mr Dalton welcomed them all back, wished them a successful term and gave them a peptalk about exams, whether school or public. Prayers ended. Marc felt his hair tousled from behind and knew that God was in his heaven and all was well with the world. Marc then went over to say hello to Mr Bell who invited him to his study for a cup of cocoa, only the cocoa was cold, rather reddish in colour and served in a small glass. They discussed the holidays, but more particularly what Marc had read and gave him some advice for his proposed Cambridge application. He reminded him that in September he would be returning to two days of exams, the result of which would determine whether his application would receive the School's support. Then finally as Marc said he had to go to get his books ready for the following day Mr Bell asked him whether he had missed Seb. Marc blushed, admitted he had and said how much better he had felt this afternoon when he had seen him. Mr Bell left it at that. Marc thanked him, wished him good night and departed with a warm inward glow, not to get his things ready, but to join his friends in the sixth form common room where they talked and watched a little television.
The next day Marc rose at seven, showered and dressed and went over with Tom and Doug to breakfast. Chapel at nine, the smile, the smile returned and he knew that the new term had truly begun.

XXIII

Seb had had little time to himself over the Easter holidays. The family nearly always had something arranged. In fact it was almost as if he had come back to Buckton College for a rest. He had sorely missed Marc in the few quiet moments of his time at home. So good had been the psychology behind the holiday arrangements that those quiet moments had only been in bed, either when he awoke or before he drifted off to sleep, but back at school he compensated for that. Not introspective by nature normally Seb had, however, had a seed sown in his mind by Marc's company and his education in senior school. As his parents had departed in the early afternoon and his mates not yet arrived, he had been on his own until Marc knocked on his door, alone with his thoughts. Later in the afternoon Daniel, Rob, Ian and Ben arrived in dribs and drabs and he was busy catching up with their news, which went on over supper and up until Prayers. After Prayers he noticed that Marc was not around and went back to his study to finish unpacking and to get ready for the next day which took him until bedtime. Strangely he felt tired, but not sleepy. After a shower he took off his dressing gown and slipped into bed naked, as he loved to do, trusting there would not be a fire drill on the first night and secretly hoping Marc might just pop in to say good night. As he lay there his mind wandered, and it wandered to his relationship with Marc. Austria had not changed everything; it had confirmed everything. Firstly he knew that whatever his feelings for him were, Marc's were the same, it was a mutual and trusting relationship sealed when Marc openly came to the realisation of his own sexuality. What had begun way back in September as sheer sexual lust, a stopgap for the loss of Guy, had turned into love and respect. His love for Guy had been overtly sexual and he had been prepared for that to happen with Marc when the moment was right. He felt that Marc, being the elder, had taught him a lot socially and academically while it was just because of his past experiences that he had more to teach Marc in the sexual sphere. Their interests had grown together for although from early on they had sport in common Seb was now finding a love of his school subjects was growing and at prep school he had never enjoyed French and Latin as much as he enjoyed them at Buckton, and in addition he now had German, all encouraged through his conversations with Marc. Seb realised how lucky he was, that he had everything going for him and all he had to do was to think positively, act sensibly and enjoy his good fortune. With that he drifted off to sleep and was woken by the prefect on duty at seven.
As it was Tuesday Seb knew he could look forward to his first cricket session of the term in the afternoon. But first was his smile at Marc in Chapel.

XXIV

The term soon slipped into routine. Once the Beginning of Term Service, Headmaster's Assembly and an admin period were over it was straight into normal lessons after break. The summer term had its own routine, but something else was creeping into Marc's and Seb's schedule, given the longer days. Again this emanated from their time in Austria aided by their sporting interests. It was their emphasis on personal fitness, spurred on by their unspoken love and cultivation of the body beautiful, for while they openly acknowledged their physical attraction to one another they had never talked to each other about the attraction their own bodies held for themselves, although their actions and body language betrayed it to the casual observer. Marc was proud of his sixpack and was to be seen flexing his muscles. Seb needed little encouragement to take off his clothes and knew of course the effect that had on Marc.
Since Austria their spending time together had roused but little comment, even less when the two families were seen together at the end of the Spring Term. And so prep completed it was nothing to see Marc and Seb go off for a run, or swimming after school or squash at weekends.
But it was at squash that Seb provocatively took the lead. There were no cricket matches on the first weekend of term, so Marc booked the court for ten. Rather than change in the house they would always take their kit with them. The changing room they found empty. Then just as he had done in the hotel in Maurach Seb slowly took off all his clothes, constantly conversing with Marc so that he had to look at him. He took his time taking his squash kit out of his bag, first his socks, then his jockstrap which he slipped on and adjusted, next his top which reached down just below his waist, followed finally by his shorts.
Seb had a perfectly good pair of tennis shorts, but anticipating Marc's reaction he would pull on his PE shorts, the ones with the elasticated top, cut narrow and long in the leg and made of translucent cotton. Marc just stood and watched open mouthed, his heart thumping, then took up the challenge and changed in identical fashion with Seb sitting on the seat watching every movement including the added flexing of the muscles and tightening of the sixpack.
Marc won the match. It was an interesting contest between the two. Marc had the advantage of age and experience, but Seb was growing fast and closing the physical gap. Seb was the more natural sportsman of the two, but Marc was the better at racquet sports. In a short time it was not all going one way.
The game over they went to shower, but led by Seb it was the reverse process, the slow removal of the squash kit, but together. Immediately Seb had removed his sweaty jockstrap Marc gave into temptation, picked it up, carefully folded it and put it to his nose, absorbing the perfume of Seb's loins. Then they went off to shower. As they came out they looked around for their towels and then they noticed them, but not where they had been left. With the noise of the water they had not heard anyone come into the changing room. If they had it would not unduly concern them, except that this someone was Jackman on the prowl. He stood there holding the towels, waiting for some fun, hoping the towels would become a bargaining tool. The expression of delight on his face at seeing naked flesh soon froze to horror when he realised whose naked flesh it was. Marc and Seb said nothing. They just looked at one another, nodded and zoomed into action. Marc covered the door to prevent his escape, while Seb chased and grabbed hold of the unfortunate. "You’ve come for a shower, Jackman?" enquired Seb and assuming the answer the two picked him up, took back their towels and carried him into the shower fully clothed. Seb turned on the water. If Jackman tried to say anything they turned him so that he got a mouth full of water. "Your hair needs washing. Did you bring your shampoo?" said Seb.
"Gurgle gurgle," came the reply. Meanwhile he had fetched Marc's two-in-one shampoo and conditioner from his bag and between them they gave his greasy mop the first wash it had had for days if not weeks. They turned off the water and went and dried themselves and got dressed.
As they left the changing room to return to Paxford they noticed there had been an April shower - the perfect cover if anybody asked questions about why Jackman was soaked. As they entered Paxford there was a lot of jeering at Jackman and enquiries about getting caught in the shower. At that point Marc and Seb walked past, looked at Jackman, looked at each other, smiled and said nothing.

XXV

Work apart the major concern at school the next week was cricket. With matches the following Saturday net practices took place after school each day there had been no games lesson. This meant Marc could wander down and watch the U14s. Throughout the age groups competition for a team place was intense with only eleven places within a year group of sixty up to the fifth form, although a 3rd XI was run for the sixth formers. Occasionally B teams would be fielded to encourage the up and coming, but as it was policy to hold matches only on a Saturday competition was fierce for a team place. Marc liked his cricket, but admitted himself that he was not outstanding and was quite content to find that he had been awarded a place in the 3rd XI.
At the end of such an intense cricketing week and on the night before the first matches of the season it was not surprising that conversation should readily turn to sport at that Friday's mentoring meeting. The third formers were keen to tell Marc that Daniel, Rob and Seb had gained their places, but the greatest surprise of all was when Rob announced that Seb had been appointed captain. There was a tumult of applause and everyone thumped him on the back in congratulation, including Marc who experienced an immense feeling of pride.
Into May the 1sts, 3rds and U14s were playing away against one of the cathedral schools. It had been one of those 3rds matches. Buckton had won the toss, but realising they could be weak they put Cathedral in to bat in order to make a match of it. As luck would have it Buckton got the opposition out just before lunch for 61, the highest scorer being Extras. Buckton were in with a chance, but knew whatever happened it would be over pretty early in the afternoon and they would have to wait around for the 1sts and the U14s to finish. Marc went in to bat at number five and was partnering his mate Tom. Stonewall Jackson would have been proud of the fight put up by Buckton, had he not been distracted by the thrill of watching some grey paint dry. Marc actually gained the top score with ten before being bowled middle stump. However, the match did reach a climax. Tom was still in bat with eight runs when Doug at number eleven came in. Doug knocked a four on the last ball of the over which brought Buckton College to a total of sixty-two to win. Tom settled down at the other end to face. He hit the ball fairly and squarely through the covers, shouted yes to Doug and they ran. Tom looked to Doug for the winning second run. Doug shouted, but Tom misheard and then suddenly realised that Doug was halfway down the wicket. He ran like mad, pushed his bat forward as he was in reach of the crease, but not far enough as the throw from the outfield by sheer fluke took the bails off as he was but inches away. The match had been tied on sixty-one runs.
The teams clapped each other off and before changing took an early tea. Marc sat between Doug and Tom as they had an earnest discussion as to whose fault it was, at one moment pacifying them and at the next stirring them up even more. Tea over he decided to wander off and watch the U14s. He was in luck. Seb was still in bat and looking over the scorer's shoulder Marc could see he was on forty-eight. He looked resplendent in his snug fitting whites and his appearance took more of Marc's attention than the cricket. He cut a superb profile. A four on the next ball gave him his half century, but the following one abruptly ended his innings taking his off-stump out of the ground. He was there to clap him off. He congratulated him and let him take off his pads and gloves which he went and put away into his bag in the pavilion. Seb came out again and joined Marc, saying he would walk round the boundary to keep a captain's eye on things. It was an excuse to wander off with Marc.
Marc had brought his camera with him and could not resist asking for a photo. As Seb posed (how he wished he had kept his pads on and his bat) Marc was about to take him in profile when he said "Seb, don't forget to take your box out." Seb turned to him and grinned, his eyes twinkling.
"I already have," and awaited the click of the shutter. As he turned away Marc saw through Seb's cricket whites the straps of his jockstrap across his buttocks. He immediately experienced that threefold feeling again: a lightness of heart which made him gasp, a feeling of longing in the pit of his stomach and a heaviness in his loins. Seb knew what he was doing and continued to tart as they completed their circuit of the boundary, adding cheekily "I see you’ve still got your box in under your whites!" For once Marc did not even blush, but just put his hands in his pockets as they walked on together.
Aided by Seb's fifty-two the U14s won with two wickets to spare. The 1sts went on to the bitter end at seven o'clock for a draw, so it was an odd mood in the coach back to Buckton College - a win, a tie and a draw.
Back at school the coach disgorged its occupants who made their way back to their separate houses. It was too late for the sixth formers to go into the local town. Marc was tired, not from the cricket, but from the waiting around and the journey. At least the day had taken him away from his work. He changed out of his school uniform and slumped down in a chair in the sixth form common room to watch the television.

XXVI

The term was racing on. School life was slowly altering as the public exams started and put the fifth and upper sixth forms out of action. Both in school and in the houses the lower sixth had to shoulder more responsibility and Marc had more duties to carry out. Not that he minded, but it did cut down on his sporting activities, which meant that he couldn't be alone with Seb quite so often. Also they both had to remember that school exams were approaching which Seb might easily have ignored as it was his first year at Buckton but for Marc keeping his mind focused.
It was the Friday before the Whitsun Bank Holiday, half term. As usual CCF parade was cancelled and school ended at midday. Marc was due to travel home by train which unfortunately prevented his acceptance of an impromptu invitation to lunch from Seb's father, but at least they could have a short chat before the school coach left for the railway station.
For both boys half term was a welcome break from school, its routine and its stresses, unfortunately tempered by their being apart, but for ten days they could hack it. Both caught up with sleep over the bank holiday weekend. Marc's treat was an overnight stay in London in cousin Susan's flat, Seb's a day spent with Guy whom he had invited to visit him. Marc handed in his film to be developed and when he saw the photos of Seb he ordered two framed enlargements, but was disappointed they had to be sent on to school as they would not be ready in time for collection. He also took the opportunity while in town to go shopping for clothes for the busy summer holidays. In the evening he took Susan out to dinner and on their return he was completely pampered by the adoring flatmates. If only they knew. Seb also was forced into shopping for clothes and sports kit, undergoing as he was his growth spurt. In one sense the week went too quickly, in another not quickly enough until they saw one another again.
When Marc returned from London, his mother had some good news. She had telephoned Tony and Margaret and on Sunday both families were going to travel down to Herefordshire to take the boys back. Poor Adam had already gone back to prep school. They were going to meet in The Old Spot for lunch primarily to discuss details of the approaching camping holiday in France. Marc was overjoyed at the thought of meeting Elly again and wished he had known before going to London. He wanted to take her a little something. It would also be an opportunity for Jessica and Ben to meet Seb before they went off on holiday.
After London Marc settled down to some revision and soon the appointed day arrived. Marc's kit packed and loaded, the family set off just after eleven for a one o'clock rendezvous. Seb and his family had already arrived and as Marc's family walked into the bar both Seb and Elly ran towards him fighting to put their arms round him while Elly gave him a great big kiss. The introductions among the siblings over they got on with the important things - ordering the meal.
At table Marc had been commandeered by Elly while Seb was flanked by Jessica and Ben. To everyone's relief the children all took to one another immediately. It was a pity Adam was not there to complete the group. Lunch had gone so well that Ben and Jessica were quite happy to travel on to Buckton with Tony and Margaret while Elly and Seb shared the back seat with Marc in his parents' car.
It did not go unnoticed that the two families arrived together, and mixed up, but no eyebrows were raised. It was just assumed that Seb's and Marc's families were good friends which, of course, they were by now. The Daltons had laid on an informal tea on the lawn for parents at which Mr and Mrs Dalton welcomed the two families together. This was not the first time they had met Ben. More than ready to join Buckton College, but with another year to wait, he would make a worthy replacement for his elder brother when he left. Indeed he looked very much as Marc did in the third form with the most noticeable difference of the blue eyes set in the same open face. As happens so often in families, as number three he had neither the responsibility nor the authority of the oldest sibling, but compensated by being the entertainer, the clown, the jester, more extrovert than Marc, more than cheerful and lively by disposition and ever ready to join in with a joke. Tough and energetic Ben was potentially a better sportsman than his brother, but while bright and intelligent in the way he came across he was still too young to have proved himself in the academic field.
Marc's parents took the opportunity to peel off without the children to have a word with Mr Bell. They presented him with a bottle of sherry after hearing that so much of his had been consumed over the year. They had a long chat about Marc, particularly his social development, but Mr Bell assured them that there was nothing to worry about and that he would be in touch if there were. Finally the luggage was transferred to the studies and the two families took their leave in such a manner that it would have been near impossible for an outsider to distinguish who belonged to which. After much handshaking and hugging the families climbed into their own cars and motored off. Our two boys felt somewhat relieved and relished the ensuing silence.
"Seb, I’ve got something for you, but it’s got to be posted on."
"That’s odd," answered Seb. "I’ve got something for you, but it's not ready yet," and they left each other in suspense.
On the Tuesday the post brought Marc a large flat package. He knew what it was and only had time to say "Seb, it’s arrived," as they passed fleetingly in the corridor at school. They had arranged to go running after school, so Marc decided to hand over his gift when they returned. However, the weather turned nasty. The juniors had to use the indoor cricket nets for their games afternoon or go swimming. The sportshall was nearing completion, but would not be in commission this term. Therefore they checked the squash court and found it free. This was just the opportunity Seb wanted. He simply hoped they would have the changing room to themselves. They were in luck. They went through their usual ritual, then started to play. Seb already had his eye in from batting in the nets and was more warmed up. Consequently he gained the upper hand and could notch up a victory. They came back into the changing room. After the Jackman experience it had become their habit to check to see whether he was lurking there. They were alone. The changing ritual continued and when Seb had stripped off he handed Marc his jockstrap, the one he had been wearing all afternoon, and Marc took his customary sample of the bouquet. He was pleased he still had his shorts on, so effective was its scent. He handed it back to Seb who carefully folded it, the nametape facing outwards, placed it neatly into a clear resealable polythene bag and handed it to Marc. "You can keep this one. I had to get some new kit over half term, so I bought three new ones." He produced them from his bag, all three with his name sewn on prominently. "There’s the cricketing one," and he put his hand in the pouch, "an ordinary one, but in black - that’ll get you going - and I couldn’t resist this one," he said showing Marc the third. "It’s for ballet dancers, I suppose. I like the idea of the single strap going up the back, but it won't be any good for squash," he added giving Marc a knowing wink. Marc was stunned into silence. He wasn't embarrassed, he wasn't insulted, surprised yes. Since that first experience in the autumn term he had never hidden his jockstrap fetish from Seb who always made sure he enjoyed it. It was the trouble that Seb had been to which amazed him.
He unsealed the strip and took another sniff and said "Seb, I don’t know what to say apart from thank you. That’s wicked."
"Enjoy. Just keep it sealed. I'm getting just that bit too big now to give it a refill." Marc snorted with laughter and hugged him in gratitude. Then they went off and showered.
When they got back to Paxford it was time for prep, but five minutes before the end Marc slipped along to Seb's room with his packet. Invited to enter after their normal signal Marc said "This is for you, Seb," and handed him the photograph taken in May after Seb's half century. It had captured everything - the grin because he was pleased with his score, the warmth of his twinkling blue eyes and the very masculine profile in his brilliant white cricket kit. The picture defied even Seb's modesty. Marc took the enlargement from its frame, turned it over to show where he had written: 'To my dearest Seb, with all affection and congratulations on the half century. Your own Marc.' with the date. Six months ago it would still have been initials for the names. As Seb hugged him and kissed his forehead Marc explained he also had a copy for himself which he asked Seb to autograph after Prayers.

XXVII

Part of the mentoring tradition was that the mentors took the third form out on an activity day. Marc and Tom had decided to do what their own mentors had done. So they combined groups for a day's walk in the Welsh Hills. They had persuaded Mr Bell to drive them in a school minibus to Hafren Forest from where they would follow the River Severn up to its source at Blaenhafren on Plynlimon. It meant a bit of a sacrifice on Mr Bell's part as one of the objects of the exercise was that the mentors should be in charge and not dependent on a member of staff. However, he seemed pleased to do the job for two of his A-level pupils and said the sacrifice would be compounded by his having to find a country pub and have a good Sunday lunch. He also booked out two of the School's mobile phones in case any emergency should arise. However, as they had four years' CCF training with D of E behind them he felt that he need not be too concerned on this glorious June day when it would not get dark until ten at night.
Marc and Tom combined their mentor meetings that Friday to brief the groups together. It was to make sure that they were properly kitted out, maps were available, packed lunches had been arranged and any extras could be bought from Mrs Miggins at the School shop on Saturday morning. Those in school teams had to get their chums to do it for them
So Sunday morning at eight with the sun shining in a cloudless sky the third form and their two mentors with rucksacks boarded the minibus with Mr Bell at the helm. It was not too bad a journey for as far as Llanidloes they were largely on trunk roads. There they gained their first sight of the River Severn as they crossed it and doubled back. Mr Bell took them along the scenic route so that they could view the vast Clywedog Lake before dropping south again into Hafren Forest. Before departing he used Marc's camera to take a group photo. The mentors stood at either end, but the third form had mixed themselves up to show a united Paxford front. Only Seb made sure he was standing next to Marc with his arm round his shoulders, although he did balance the picture with his other arm resting round Daniel's. Having arranged for Mr Bell to collect them at six they waved goodbye to him as he drove off, picked up their rucksacks and started on their way.
At first the terrain through the forest was reasonably flat. The map-reading had to be done with care for the Severn had several similar looking tributaries, but the rule of thumb was to keep right. They passed the measuring station and did their best to raise the reading of the water level - amber alert in Gloucestershire in four days' time! At last the ground began to rise. The longest river in Great Britain had become a wide stream which they crossed at will according to where the path was easier to follow. In the forest the warmth of the sun made it feel humid. Finally they came to their first resting point, the Hafren Falls. The falls themselves were perhaps six or seven feet high, but the advantage was that as it poured out from between two rocks it formed a shallow pool deep and large enough to swim in until the river carried on its way. The river is at this point far away from human habitation. They could expect to see nobody else all day until Mr Bell came to pick them up.
The lads shed their rucksacks and started to get changed into their swimming gear, quite happy until an expletive rent the air. Everyone turned round to look at Seb who had unrolled his towel only to find that he had forgotten his swimming trunks. "“Oh well, nothing else for it," he said and at that stripped off all his clothes, jumped into the water and stood under the falls as if he were standing in the shower. Marc could not resist a photo, and Seb's devil-may-care attitude simply encouraged the others who either followed him in naked or stripped off their own swimming trunks not to be outdone. They swam and chased and splashed one another for a good quarter of an hour, little affected by the temperature of the water, before they had cooled down. Some taking advantage of the occasion sunbathed without their clothes on, but as the excitement came to a natural end they started to dry themselves off and get dressed for the rest of the climb. Once they were out of the forest it was clear pastureland complete with sheep and they had left the humidity behind.
The climb, while steep, was not challenging. They passed the first bridge over the River Severn - two wooden planks with a single handrail - which must have been there since the year dot. Finally the terrain levelled out into what looked like a series of mud pools (it was in fact peat) and an ancient signpost in the format of the old Great Western signs informed them that they had reached the source of the Severn. Here they decided to have lunch. The day was still young, so looking at the map and taking a compass bearing they decided to head for the source of the River Wye, just over two miles away, but were even more disappointed to find, assuming they were in the correct spot, that it had dried up. There was no sign to comfort them, but the formation of the ground looked right.
They headed back the way they came. The breeze and the altitude made them feel cool. Then the descent along the banks of the Severn. Once back in Hafren Forest they left the river at one point to go straight down a track at the bottom of which they rejoined the river. The tributaries, the measuring station and they were soon back at the picnic spot where the minibus had left them. Half an hour or so until Mr Bell was due back, so Tom took out the mobile and tried to ring him. In the wilds of Wales he could get no signal so the group just sat around, consumed any remaining food, changed their walking boots for trainers and simply chilled out.
When Mr Bell turned up a few minutes early they greeted him cheerily, climbed into the bus and departed. Among themselves they had agreed that they would stand Mr Bell dinner for giving up his Sunday. They broke the news to him. It was just a matter of finding a pub in Llanidloes. To judge by the chatter, both in the bus and over dinner, it was clear everyone had had a thoroughly enjoyable day. However, it was not the source or the scenery, it was not the sense of achievement either, but the skinny-dipping which had won the day. The real success had been just a group of lads out together for the day, enjoying each other's company. Mr Bell just smiled to himself. Dinner and the attendant relaxation over they rejoined the bus still jubilant, despite being healthily tired. On arrival at Buckton College Mr Bell was thoroughly thanked, as were Marc and Tom, and then it was Prayers, showers and early bed.

XXVIII

The end of term and the end of the school year with just five weeks to go were approaching rapidly and at the same time the School was entering that serious period in the run up to internal examinations. With Cambridge within his sights Marc wanted to put up a good showing in all three of his A-level subjects, especially since school support would depend so much upon them, plus the additional school exams he would have to sit at the beginning of the Autumn term which would determine his UCAS ticket. Meanwhile the continuing fine summer weather beckoned towards the outdoors. The sacrifice was his sporting activities with Seb, but Marc even turned that to good use at the following Friday mentoring meeting. He decided to gather his five together outside on the lawn for cocoa and the meeting and it seemed an ideal spot to be, in the cool of the evening with the sun not even setting yet. To begin with they just wanted to talk about the trip to Plynlimon and Marc was wise enough to give them their rein. The day out had obviously been a great success and of course they wanted to know whether the photos were ready, but that would not be until after the exeat weekend. He then talked about his first climb to the source of the Severn when he had been in the third form and could link it up to the way his mentor advised them to settle down to some revision and take the school exams seriously, to the point where one of his group had left them after a disastrous academic year and it hadn't been a thickie either. There were murmurings that perhaps Jackman could be prevented from doing any revision. He would not say who the replacement was, but told them that with their own studies now they had a better opportunity for private revision.
As the meeting drew to its natural conclusion he was pleased to see that Seb had left his maths file behind on the lawn. He could be sure of a visit, for he wanted to reinforce what he had said. Back in his study as he sat going over some Latin irregular verbs the knock came and Seb entered in his dressing-gown. He could now tell him that their evening runs would have to stop during the week, but they could still do things together at weekends. Seb's face visibly fell. Marc did have the impression he had not fully taken in what he had said at the meeting. It was a hard, but useful lesson in avoiding self-indulgence and their own relationship apart it demonstrated what personal power, if not charisma, the senior boys had over the juniors. As Seb stood up from sitting on Marc's bed his dressing-gown fell open revealing that he was ready for bed. He had nothing on underneath. Marc smiled at him shaking his head, said "You little tart" as he felt the threefold pangs, patted him on the bottom and sent him off to his own room.
During the build-up to exams the atmosphere in the House became tetchy, it did every year, and at last exams were upon them. The Buckton three sessions a day system concentrated the mind. It was not so bad for the sixth form as they had revision periods inbetween, but it certainly kept the fourths and thirds quiet. The upper sixth and the fifths were coming to the end of their public exams and either disappeared on work experience or were found things to do at College. Many used the time to upgrade their fitness for sportsday and the swimming gala.
Exam week ended at midday on the Friday and the remaining inhabitants were sent off for the exeat. Marc and Seb said a fleeting goodbye as the former was taken off for his train and the latter waited for father to turn up. There was little protest at their parting for both were mentally whacked and in need of a weekend's TLC. The long weekend also gave the staff an opportunity without sports and duties to get through their exam marking. The following week was strictly for the return of exams and no other distractions were permitted.
Marc was pleased to be with his family again and his mother made a great fuss of him, probably not fully appreciated in his state of exhaustion. Over the exeat he did remember to take in his film for developing and arranged for it to be sent directly to school. Mother and father said they would take him back to school as it was summer and he did not need to be back until Prayers, giving him more time to recover. So at a quarter to nine he was deposited at school along with his travelling bag and he knew he was back in the routine when he felt his hair being ruffled as the House was dismissed from Prayers.
Marc found out that he had done rather well in his exams. His mate Tom had pipped him by one percentage mark in French, but he gained his revenge by coming undisputed top of German. The Latin was not too bad either. In the evenings he could start up his fitness régime again with Seb, with the added incentive of the House athletics and swimming competitions. With a week to go lessons officially ended for the term before lunch on the Friday. The CCF exercise weekend meant two nights sleeping out with a return late Sunday afternoon - physically demanding, but mentally refreshing. Marc and Seb had resigned themselves that they would not meet that weekend; they never had on CCF activities.
Finally the last week. Monday practices: sports, swimming, modern language plays. Tuesday sportsday: Paxford came third in the House competition, but the compensation was that Seb repeated his achievement of the year before at prep school, running at number four for the winning U14 relay team. Meanwhile Marc came first in the open 1500 metres. He was free to take a picture of Seb running, in red house vest, brilliant white translucent nylon running shorts which could not hide the black jockstrap. Wednesday morning the swimming gala: here again both Marc and Seb excelled, feeling the benefit of their sessions in the pool after school. Marc asked Tom to take a picture of him along with Seb in their scrungies, him in his yellow and royal blue Hom Lycras and Seb in his turquoise Speedos, both holding their certificates. Wednesday evening the modern language plays in which each year took part with contributions in French and German. Thursday practices: for a concert in the evening and Speech Day on Friday afternoon. Both Marc's and Seb's parents would be there then.

XXIX

Thursday was to prove the most interesting day of the week for Marc. He had just ended his last House duty of the term. How relieved he was not to have been given the last night. He was driving the stragglers over to breakfast and as the last to leave had no one to walk over with until Terry from a neighbouring house caught up and started reliving the House swimming gala. As he slumped into his seat at the breakfast table Dave Lane from the upper sixth told him Mr Dalton wanted to see him straight after breakfast. Marc started racking his brains about his House duty. Had he forgotten to lock up? Had there been a riot after lights out in the fourth form shower? Why hadn't he checked to see whether anyone had tied up Jackman with own dressing-gown cord? Anyway, once he saw Mr Dalton he realised that it wasn't that serious and he left his study as if walking on air. He got through the practices. He had not seen Seb all day, but on the other hand had been too busy to dwell on the fact. He managed to get most of his packing done, always worse in the summer as they had to empty their rooms completely. The concert started at seven. This time Marc only had a couple of pieces to sing with the choir. As usual the Daltons were holding a reception for those parents who had attended the concert and Marc was pleased to see that Tony and Margaret were there, but disappointed that Elly hadn't come with them. He still sent her a weekly picture postcard when he wrote them to his own brother and sister. They were booked in at The Old Spot again and Marc was overjoyed when he heard that they had arranged with his parents to have a family dinner together the following evening.
Eventually the guests drifted off and Prayers could get underway about ten. Marc sat on the settee as normal with Tom, a gaggle of third formers behind them. With prayers said Mr Dalton could get down to the business of the meeting. It was mainly admin, warnings not to let the high spirits get out of hand and to make sure that on the next day when the School was on show everything ran smoothly. "And finally you will have been wondering who the Head of House for next year will be." The silence became absolute silence for only one of the pupils knew who it was and as Marc braced himself he heard his name being announced. There was a cheer from all of the third form, some extremely violent hair ruffling and the warm applause that accompanies genuine approval. Marc tried to get up to go and be congratulated by Mr Dalton, but the first two attempts failed as the third formers pushed him back down into his seat.
Prayers over Mr Bell congratulated him personally and invited him up to his study for a celebratory cup of cocoa. Meanwhile it was off to bed for the rest of the House. Seb went upstairs with his third form friends. It would be some time before they finally settled with midnight feasts and other high jinks. At last under coercion from the sixth formers who had seen it all before and who were more than ready themselves to hit the hay the younger members of the House went to bed.
Seb took a shower first. For bed he remained completely undressed, set his alarm clock, climbed beneath the duvet and immediately sank into oblivion. At two o'clock his alarm rang. He woke up straightaway, rather sleepy, and reset the clock which he put into the pocket of the dressing-gown he was now wearing. He listened. It was all quiet. He could always say he was going to the toilet. His lights off he slowly opened the door and peered out. No one about. The corridor was lit by dim night lights. He tiptoed along the corridor until he reached Marc's room, knocked the knock, more out of habit than wanting to wake him, turned the handle without waiting for an answer and crept in. After a year of mentoring he knew the layout well. The door closed behind him he crept up to the bed and gently woke Marc with a kiss on his forehead. Marc woke, gasped with surprise, put his bedside lamp on and smiled. Now fully awake Seb took off his dressing-gown and stark naked he did what he had been longing to do since Maurach and climbed into bed alongside Marc. Seb's chilled body forced Marc fully awake. He was powerless to resist. He did not want to resist and finally in an embrace they both fell back to sleep.
At six o'clock Seb's alarm clock rang again. In a trice he was out of bed, switched the alarm off and had put his dressing-gown over his bare body. It was already light. He kissed Marc gently on the forehead again and silently returned to his own room.

XXX

Marc woke up a quarter of an hour before he had to get up. His mind was in a confused state. He had dreamt he was back in Austria skiing and that he had just spent one of those wonderful nights with Seb's naked body cuddling up to him. As he slowly came to and sat on the edge of his bed he realised that it had been so warm that he had taken off his shorts and tee shirt which were now lying on the floor. He had the smell of Seb's body, otherwise so perfectly preserved in the sealed jockstrap, in his nostrils and still feeling hot and sticky he made a dive for the shower, at first warm and then cold to bring him back to the land of the living. He got dressed, white shirt and dark suit for Speech Day. Now fully awake he was at one with the world and tidying up his room he found a spare alarm clock on his desk. So it hadn't been a dream and on realising what had happened a broad grin spread across his face. What an end of term - 1500m champion, winner in the swimming gala, good exam results, Head of House designate and now a thoroughly enjoyable night with Seb behind him.
He had to go and see him. He walked along the corridor, tapped on the door and on hearing the reply walked in. He was taken aback to see Seb in a dark blue suit, pale blue shirt and an U14 colours tie. He looked so grown up. He gazed into Seb's twinkling blue eyes.
"I believe this belongs to you," he said, trying not to grin, and held out the alarm clock. He could resist no longer and just had to take him in a bear hug. "That was very naughty of you, but so nice that I can't wait until we’re on holiday."
"You will have to. I wasn't going to tell you this, but I've got a double sleeping bag at home."
It was time for breakfast. More Speech Day practices, Headmaster's Assembly. The new prefects were announced. As Head of House Marc would automatically be one, but he applauded particularly loudly when Tom's name was read out and rushed to congratulate him afterwards. Early lunch and into Speech Day. Marc received the sixth form German prize, but his heart leapt when it was announced that Seb had gained the third form prize for academic progress. He was conceited enough to think he might have had a hand in that. Straight from Speech Day into the End of Term Service which traditionally struck the heart strings, especially among the leavers. Marc, sat with the choir thinking 'this time next year…', had no chance of seeing Seb. The hymns were sung well by the School - Jerusalem, Guide me, oh Thou Great Redeemer, Lord, Dismiss us with Thy Blessing.
Finally the Blessing, the Recession and School was out, over, finished for two months. The pupils could find their parents and depart. The coaches were lined up to take the railway travellers to the station. In ten minutes Buckton College would be a ghost town.
Marc found his parents along with Jessica and Ben. Seb found his along with Adam and Elly. Tony and Margaret insisted that they should all go and pay their respects to the Daltons and joined the queue. Marc was more laid back. This was after all his fourth end of Summer Term and he knew with a little patience the school and house would soon be clear. He didn't have to say goodbye to Seb as the two families were meeting later at The Old Spot, so Marc concentrated on loading the car while telling his mother and father his good news. He had been right. The school drives were now practically clear of people, pupils and cars. Marc's parents made their way with Jessica and Ben to Mr Dalton's study, while Marc went off to see Mr Bell. Of course he was looking forward to the holidays, but on the other hand he loved the community at Buckton and would sorely miss those close to him. He thanked Mr Bell for all the help he had given him - the weekend cottage in February, the extra advice and encouragement with work, his personal interest and his understanding for what Marc had undergone emotionally during the year. Without his support it could have gone so very wrong. Finally he expressed his appreciation for being appointed Head of House, certain in his own mind where support for that had come from. They shook hands and with a friendly pat on the bottom Mr Bell sent Marc on his way.
On the stairs he met the family going in the opposite direction as he went to say goodbye to Mr and Mrs Dalton. This farewell was probably a little more formal than the one in Mr Bell's study. Again Marc expressed his gratitude, reciprocated by Mr Dalton who asked him to come back a couple of days early again to help prepare for the new school year. He was also asked who he thought would make good mentors for the new third formers and he added three names to the debate. Mr Dalton would be in touch during the holidays, but meanwhile he wished Marc a good time in France and Germany and reminded him he would need all his strength for the following year.
Reunited by the car Marc's family motored off to The Old Spot where Seb's tribe was waiting for them. Elly ran and hugged Marc. Adam was introduced and it was of help as he and Ben would be starting together at Buckton in just over a year's time and because of their elder brothers both would be in Paxford House. It needed a large table to seat all ten of them. Marc was flanked by Elly and Seb and while Elly took most of his attention Seb was making a special effort to entertain Ben. Jessica and Adam on the other hand were getting on like a house on fire and several times had to be recalled to planet Earth or they would have missed out on food.
It was going to be a late evening. While the coffee was being served Marc and Seb made their customary excuse and left the table. The sun was just above the horizon and they managed to walk in the garden away from the gaze of the restaurant windows. Their parting was not so poignant this time for within a week they would be reunited on their camping holiday in France. They sat briefly on a secluded seat surrounded by the heavy perfume of honeysuckle. Marc turned to Seb, held his hand and stroked his knee.
"Thank you for last night. Only you could have planned that. Je t’adore." A cool breeze blew up reminding them they should go back inside.
"Not goodbye, but au revoir and auf Wiedersehen." Seb squeezed Marc's hand and Marc kissed him on the brow. By the time they rejoined the main party, their ardour had cooled and they sat down to drink their coffee.
The departure was swift and painless. In the car on the way home Marc was silent, but by no means down, quite the opposite. He was quietly counting his blessings, what he had learnt at school over the last year, what he had discovered not only about himself, but about human nature and others. Who said boarding school was a narrow existence? The good times with Seb were flashing through his mind starting with the fact he had been seduced by him and even more enjoyable the manner of that seduction. He had achieved a lot on the gamesfield. Would he have done that without the competition and encouragement from Seb? How could he have learnt so much from a boy over two years his younger? He was going home with an academic prize in his pocket and the appointment as Head of House. What did the immediate future hold? The possibility of Cambridge, two visits abroad including an uninterrupted fortnight in the company of the one whom he loved and who loved him. What more could he want?

XXXI

A few days later Seb and Marc's family were safely ensconced on a campsite on France's south-western coast. The weather had been hot and dry, but it was a bearable heat which made camping a pleasure. Marc's father and mother had hired a caravan minus its wheels, an immobile mobile home, with Jessica and Ben, while Marc and Seb shared a two room tent. The advantages of the system were such that all the gear for a camping holiday was provided, which cut down on luggage, and also the tented area was some hundred yards away from the caravan site, which meant that Marc and Seb were not only nearer the shower block, but they were to a certain extent on their own, for which Marc's mother profusely, but unnecessarily apologised.
It had been an odd day. At least Marc had found it so. They had been visiting a theme park and had spent a thoroughly enjoyable time, but something was wrong. Was Marc the only one to notice? Seb was definitely out of sorts. He confirmed that there was nothing physically wrong with him, but he was quiet and withdrawn whereas normally he would be one of the instigators of any fun or mischief among the children. Marc's parents just put it down to tiredness, the journey had caught up with him and they had been going to bed late and getting up early with the long days of July.
Marc could not get to the bottom of it, but felt that whatever was occupying Seb's mind it would be better to keep busy rather than mope around in an atmosphere of self-pity and so with his agreement Marc said they would organise a barbecue for the family and had indeed gone off to the campsite supermarket to buy provisions. The campsite had its own barbecues and it was just a question of 'putting your towel' on one before the Germans did.
Both Seb and Marc enjoyed preparing food. At boarding school they had little opportunity, but would make up for that in the holidays. To cut a long story short the barbecue was a great success, both in the culinary sense and in so far that it achieved its purpose of taking Seb out of himself. There threatened to be a hiatus when Jessica enquired about one of the steaks she had eaten, for it had possessed a flavour of its own. Marc had the foresight to ask her if she'd enjoyed it before Seb informed her that the pre-pack had been labelled cheval. Ben failed miserably to make any capital out of it.
It was elevenish with a glow still in the sky out to sea before the party finally broke up and the family divided to go to bed. A full moon was rising and a cooling, salty breeze was blowing in from the sea, making the temperature comfortable and keeping the mosquitoes at bay. Marc and Seb undressed for bed. Seb had kept his promise and brought his sleeping bag despite Marc's mother's protests that they were provided and so he didn't need it, but then she did not know that it was a double one and in any case he said it was made of cotton as he could not sleep in a nylon sleeping bag. Marc fell asleep immediately, only to wake up an hour later. At first he blamed the full moon which was shining straight in through the plastic window of the tent, but when he found that Seb was not only awake, but had not slept a wink he immediately sympathised with him.
"What’s the matter, Seb? Are you homesick?", an odd question to put to someone who had spent six years at boarding school.
"No," he replied. "Do you feel sleepy?"
"Not now, I feel completely refreshed."
"Do you want to go for a walk?"
"I’ll tell you what. I’d love to go for a swim."
"You’re on.”
The boys sprang out of their sleeping bag, slipped on shorts and a tee shirt each. Marc put on his sandals, Seb his trainers, they grabbed their towels and wandered along the path towards the beach. In the bright moonlight Marc could not help staring at Seb who had selected his (Marc's) favourite long-legged, thigh-hugging, elasticated-topped gym shorts. As they walked along he slipped the fingers of his right hand inside the back while resting his thumb outside on the elastic. Seb reciprocated.
"You know why I can’t sleep?"
"No."
"Well, it's the same reason I’ve been in an odd mood all day. It's the first anniversary of the day Guy and I split up, the day we left prep school."
"So that’s what’s got you down?"
"Not exactly down. It’s just made me thoughtful. And what I’ve been thinking about is not so much leaving Guy - that was inevitable anyway - but about us and what you mean to me. Mind you, we parted in style. At the End of Term Assembly the leavers had to go up onto the stage and shake hands with the Headmaster. I went second to last, Guy still nominally head boy last. They'd decided it would cause too much embarrassing explanation to sack him. After we'd both shaken hands we walked down the steps together with our arms round each other's waist. It didn't go down terribly well, but there was little they could do, especially as they had hushed everything up. In a way I've got a bit of a conscience, not about that."
"What do you mean?" In the meantime they had reached the beach. As the tide was going out, they put their towels on the sand just above high water mark. There was no one else around, so they lay down and put their arms round each other's shoulders. Marc knew better than to break the spell and go straightaway splashing into the sea. He was a good judge of atmosphere and he had realised that Seb finally wanted to talk and consequently needed someone to listen.
"Well, you probably think that your meeting me and us getting on so well were completely fortuitous." Marc made a nondescript noise to show he was listening. "You remember our chat back in Maurach? I was determined to tell you the truth, which I did, but I didn't tell you the whole truth because I didn't know how you would take it. It could have turned you off completely and that would have hurt us both. Now, four months later, I know I can tell you anything and everything." Marc felt privileged. What he could not tie up, though, was the robust extrovert Seb at school with this tender and sensitive Seb lying beside him on holiday.
"Let me explain. When I started at Buckton, I was determined to fill the gap left by Guy. To a certain extent it was pre-planned on my part, but I didn't know how to carry out the plan. Guy and me, we just grew up together, and you can't just go up to someone like at a disco. You could get yourself a good slapping very quickly and despite my defiance the previous term I was determined to fit in. It wasn't very long before I spotted that monster Jackman, either. I'd been encouraged to respect Buckton, with father being an old boy, and after a year there I really do. Yet on the very first night there you were. By the way you were staring at me I knew you were interested - that's experience - and the moment I saw you I was smitten."
"That’s more than I did," Marc thought to himself.
"You were, you are so handsome and you've got that sparkle in you and when I saw how clever you were - remember the GCSE results? - that clinched it and I made it a personal challenge to win you over. Next day at Chapel I couldn't believe my luck sitting opposite you, and you were staring again. On that first day I found you so hot that I couldn't bring myself to look at you. Then it all happened. I couldn't have planned it better myself. You were a mentor, I was in your mentoring group, and once we had been formally introduced there was not only the basis for a relationship, but you smiled at me next day in Chapel. After that ruffling your hair, leaving something behind in your room each time, they were part of my devious plot."
"Not so devious, looking back," said Marc, "it was all so obvious with hindsight, and I was so slow because I didn't even fully understand my own feelings till our chat in Maurach," Marc sighed.
They lay there in silence. However, all kinds of thoughts were racing through Marc's head. While he had always found Seb a considerate boy, he hadn't realised he was so deep and sensitive. He could ignore his scheming nature. Seb was now emotionally exhausted. He lay there just staring into the moonlit sky. The tide had now receded noticeably. Marc spoke first. "Are you ready?"
"I’m ready," at which they stripped off their clothes and ran naked into the sea. They swam and chased, ducking and diving until their physical exhaustion matched their emotional exhaustion, left the sea, dried each other and out of a fit of sheer caprice put the other's shorts and tee shirt on. Marc was surprised Seb's clothes fitted and came to the sudden realisation how much his adolescent growth spurt had progressed. He was nearly as tall as him. Seb said "I can now see why you like me in those shorts so much," quite a compliment considering the effect the sea had had on them.
They walked briskly back to their tent, undressed and climbed into their sleeping bag. The sun was unusually high in the sky when they eventually woke the following morning.

XXXII

The years have now passed. How many I shall leave you to calculate, dear Reader, but sufficient. This was never to be a sad tale and if offbeat the ending is nonetheless happy and of good fortune. Marc we saw as someone caught up in the circumstances of his own nature and nothing was to alter there. Seb on the other hand had shown that he knew what he wanted and having received one blow to his fortune at prep school was determined never to preside over another in his life and such was the combination of Seb's (self-) determination and Marc's overall reliance on the vagaries of fortune that their destinies remained entwined in a most logical manner, but where to begin? '"Begin at the beginning and go on till you come to the end: then stop," as the King of Hearts said very gravely to the White Rabbit.'
The meeting of Marc's and Seb's families in The Old Spot was fairly near the beginning. The friendship between the two families flourished enormously and in such a way that forces the actual beginning back to the first skiing holiday in Maurach. However, more of that in a moment.
After France Marc and Seb returned to Buckton College for a very happy year. For Marc it meant hard work, but boarding school also meant that they could spend time together. Seb blossomed in his studies to his later advantage. During Marc's upper sixth year both families went skiing in Maurach during the February half term and while Marc and Seb were billeted in the annexe again, in the main hotel a deep friendship, which had originated from the previous summer's meeting in The Old Spot, was not only developing between Adam and Jessica, but, aided by a little connivance with the two elder brothers, consummated by these two thirteen year olds in the same room where Marc and Seb had first consummated to their passion the previous year.
At the end of that school year Marc and Seb parted, physically but not spiritually. Marc left with three A-levels at grade A and went up to Cambridge on a four year modern languages course. In the same autumn Seb entered the fifth form at Buckton, accompanied by Adam and Ben in the third year. Seb could not deny that he missed Marc. He had prepared himself for the event and compensated by concentrating on his work and sport. Ever the schemer he worked at his modern languages and eventually gained entrance to Cambridge just as Marc was about to return for his finals after the gap year in Germany. To celebrate Seb flew out to Greece in September to meet him for a fortnight's holiday which they spent together on the island of Mykonos.
After graduating Marc had been appointed as a junior lecturer and not uninfluenced by his reading of Thomas Mann in both his academic and personal life he worked on his doctorate in twentieth century German literature.
Time went on and during that time the families maintained their close links and over the years Jessica's and Adam's friendship had developed into romance and finally into marriage. Thus Marc and Seb became brothers-in-law.
But we must not forget Elly who was the very feminine incarnation of her elder brother, particularly in her determination. In due course she came of such an age as to go up to Cambridge in her own right, although law was her interest.
All this was a convenient arrangement. Elly had now been fully aware for some years of the relationship between her brother and her brother-in-law / future fiancé, but did not find that a barrier to espousing the one she had continued to love from a very early age.
A cool and rainy May had given way to a glorious and warm, but not over hot June which had suited Elly. Now she had graduated with a first in law she had for the next couple of months other things on her mind, for the first Saturday in July was to be her wedding day. It was not without trepidation that she had summoned up all her courage one February to use the woman's leap-day privilege to propose to her brother-in-law, Marc. He had remained her childhood sweetheart from the time they first met when he had joined her family for their annual skiing holiday. Their relationship had been odd, to say the least, but it had also stood the test of time and he was still the only man in her life. Conversely it could be said with some irony that she was the only woman in his.
When Elly had come up to Cambridge three years ago her intended was lecturing and writing his thesis. Although he occupied his own rooms in college, he had also been sharing a large house just outside Cambridge for some years with Seb now for some months his brother-in-law. Marc had bought Oddstones out of his share of a family inheritance. Elly also took up residence there when she came up and now Marc was set to become Seb's brother-in-law twice over.
Despite the fact she had full knowledge that Marc and Seb had been lovers from their schooldays Elly had continued to adore Marc and since those early days in Austria he had been constant in returning her affection. Indeed, through that holiday Marc had been made an honorary member of the family and consequently, mainly through their contacts at Buckton College, Marc's and Seb's families grew ever closer. Having grown up in supportive families they all accepted the relationship and Elly's love for her brother extended to viewing her fiancé as something shared in the way she had shared everything with her brothers. Adam, the younger one, had married Marc's sister Jessica some months earlier. Elly also knew that Seb would never marry and had been brought up in the expectation of lifelong care for him.
With ten days to go before the wedding Elly had temporarily moved out of the shared house. She would return after the honeymoon, while Seb had arranged to work abroad for a few months to allow the couple to settle in. All this had been negotiated with the tolerance and family love of their upbringing and any jealousy between them in this ménage à trois would have reared its head long ago. But now Elly was with her parents. It was the Tuesday before the wedding and Marc's stagnight, his last fling as a bachelor.
Seb's brother Adam had with a little help from Jessica not hesitated to organise the evening, as Marc and Seb had done for him before their wedding, and so during the late afternoon there was a gathering at Oddstones, the Cambridgeshire house, of Old Bucktonians with the addition of Guy, Seb's friend from his prep school days whom Marc had as it were known long before he actually met him. Among the party was Tom, Marc's closest contemporary at Buckton College, and Ben, Marc's brother and Adam's great mate from his schooldays.
Adam had booked a table at the Mayflower, a Chinese restaurant in Cambridge, for eight o'clock and so the six were using the time to settle in, have tea and pose for a photograph of this special gathering. Over the last few days Jessica had made a marvellous live-in housekeeper, which had not been easy with the rolling programme of change in the domestic arrangements, particularly with the decorators, to make it possible for Marc and Elly to live together while Seb kept his apartment. There was no shortage of bedrooms to accommodate the visitors and Jessica would disappear to let the lads have the run of the house that evening.
At half past seven they climbed into the family space-wagon, Adam at the wheel having pledged to avoid alcohol until their return to Oddstones. The journey into Cambridge only took twenty minutes at that time of day and Marc had his own reserved parking space in college. The choice of the Mayflower met with everyone's approval. They were shown to a large round table with a big lazy Sue set in the middle and with six they could order a wide variety of food so that they each could try everything. Such was Adam's organisation that each guest had made a generous contribution to the kitty to ensure Marc had a send-off into matrimony that none of them would forget.
Seated in the restaurant and with the first course in front of them they all started to feel more relaxed. The four members of the family were naturally used to one another's frequent company, but over the years since Buckton Marc and Tom had only met occasionally, Marc and Guy perhaps more so, but Guy was a newcomer to Ben. Naturally they all had news to catch up with. Marc, the one academic, now had the title Doctor in front of his name which led to some natural leg-pulling when he was asked to diagnose their imaginary ailments. Tom was something successful in the City.
The seating arrangements were not to prove insignificant, either. Marc was flanked by Tom and Seb. Seb's other neighbour was his old friend Guy who in turn had made sure he was sitting next to Ben, little able to disguise the instant attraction he had found for him, while Adam completed the circle between Ben and Tom.
First of all they caught up with what had happened to them over the past years since Marc's and Tom's departure from Buckton. They had all followed the natural trend and gone to university. All had graduated with creditable degrees and followed successful careers. As expected, Guy who on completing prep school parted from Seb after an intense relationship had achieved as much as expected and more at King Edward's and gained a place at Oxford where he not only took a first in natural sciences, but had gained a blue in rugby. He was now engaged in research with one of the pharmaceuticals. On the rebound from his affair with Seb at prep school he was proud to report that he had been deflowered within a month of starting his new school, not unexpectedly as he had manipulated an assignation one Saturday night with a member of the U16 rugby squad whose physique and reputation both on and off the field had already inspired him and having made it a personal challenge he had in the changing room after that morning's school matches made it clear to him that he would be available in one of the practice rooms in the music school that evening, at a time when most of the school population had drifted into the city. He was not disappointed for after only five minutes of vamping on the piano the door of the soundproofed practice room opened and his suitor had arrived. Not only had he enjoyed the experience, but he found he had won acceptance at various levels in schoolboy society and while he had gained the reputation of being a lush, with his attractive and desirable body he made sure he also played hard to get and was only got by the ones he had chosen. Seb listened intently even though he had heard the story before and Marc was not uninterested, but it was Ben who sat there open-mouthed, hanging on his every word, something which had not gone unnoticed by Guy.
Ben and Adam were able to bring the company up to date with Buckton. During their time Mr Dalton had given up the House and Mr Bell had duly become Housemaster of Paxford, an appointment universally approved. In the year after Marc's and Tom's departure the hideous Jackman (Marc gave an involuntary shudder at the mention of the name.) had been expelled not, surprisingly, for his usual obnoxious behaviour, but after a series of petty thefts had been laid at his door. Few lost any sleep over that. Such was the universal dislike of him that the community had combined to ensure he was caught.
The evening rolled on with obvious enjoyment by all those present with plenty of laughter and entertainment. Two things had gone unnoticed by the assembled crowd, the passing of time as it was now near to midnight when the bill was finally presented and paid and the ever increasing attention Guy paid to Ben with the quiet compliments of his appearance and the surreptitious physical contact unconsciously returned and encouraged by the younger. As the company left the Mayflower to walk back to Marc's college a cooling breeze had sprung up, welcomed after the warmth of the restaurant. They had unwittingly split into pairs, Adam with Tom, Seb with Marc and perhaps not so unwittingly Ben with Guy.
At college the night porter on his rounds recognised Marc and said "Good night, sir" and locked the barrier after the space-wagon had left. In the back seat Guy already had his arm round Ben who snuggled up closer, pretending it was the effect of drink. Safely back at Oddstones the space-wagon disgorged its contents into the house, the party could begin and Adam could have a drink. The CD was switched on and the Rolling Stones played. A sixpack was taken out of the fridge and as soon as Marc saw it he could not resist displaying his. The sedentary academic life had not even after all these years led him to neglect it. Seb, Guy and Ben then had to display theirs, which forced the hands of Tom and Adam who lost the competition.
The music and the beers flowed. They danced and suddenly there was a ring at the doorbell. Who could that be at this time? The house was set back in its own grounds and the nearest neighbours were two hundred yards away, so they couldn't be disturbing them.
"I’ll go," shouted Adam above the music. At the front door were two burly policeman whom Adam ushered in. In the dimmed lights and their hyped-up state the others did not notice that there was something not quite right about them. The music stopped and the officers enquired who lived in the house. Marc and Seb sheepishly admitted they did and were informed about complaints received from the neighbours about a disturbance. Marc looked shame-faced and said it would not happen again, but before the party atmosphere was ruined Adam offered them a beer.
"Not on duty, sir," came the reply. They looked at their watches and said "But as we finished at twelve we'll join you." They turned round, took off their jackets, their caps and their moustaches and still not instantly recognisable it slowly dawned on Seb who they were. It was Daniel and Rob, contemporaries of his at Buckton and members of Marc's old mentoring-group. Seb ran towards them and shook their hands in a hug while Marc nearly fainted in surprise. Recovering he too greeted them heartily.
"Sorry we couldn't make it earlier. When Adam invited us we told him we work in London and wouldn't be able to get away until late. Anyway, we're both taking a duvet day tomorrow, so we thought we'd motor up and surprise you." It was indeed a surprise.
They all sat down. Adam fetched a couple more six-packs from the fridge. The beer flowed, the tongues got looser until someone suggested they played Spin the Bottle. Seb shouted "Strip Spin the Bottle" and in their enthusiasm they all agreed. An empty wine bottle was fetched from the kitchen and they were just settling down in a circle on the floor when Seb piped up again with "I want to play Dress Spin the Bottle" with which he got up, disappeared for a couple of minutes and returned completely naked carrying his clothes and sat down. He had not lost the beautiful physique he had honed since adolescence. His body was meatier, better proportioned, but still without an ounce of fat and he knew it. Marc could not ignore him as he craftily took his place at the opposite edge of the circle and his days at Buckton College flashed through his mind leading up to the present evening, for their relationship had not ceased with leaving school and it had not been a coincidence that they were sharing a house. The bottle was spun. There was bound to be a hidden agenda and as it was his stagnight Marc suspected it was him. He hadn't been far wrong, except that a new and unexpected factor had come into play. As if by coincidence the first spin pointed to him, Marc, and he was glad he still had his tie on as he casually discarded it. He spun the bottle and this time it stopped on Seb who got up, strolled over to his clothes purposely left at the far end of the room and put on a sock. The game proceeded pretty evenly until the bottle pointed to Guy. He took off his cardigan and threw it over his shoulder, but now every time he spun it, it would point at Ben without fail. Ben had been one of the most lightly dressed anyway and it was not long until he was down to his slip and it mysteriously ended there. Guy had gone as far as he wanted to and obviously did not wish to humiliate him. Seb was up to two socks and the others in various states of undress. Marc remained largely unscathed, his last garment discarded being a pocket handkerchief. The bottle pointed at Seb again. He put on a tee shirt. The bottle landed on Guy who removed his tee shirt, sent the bottle spinning to land on Seb. He got up, sauntered across the room picked up a jockstrap, a black jockstrap.
"The black jockstrap," gasped Marc half aloud and felt his heart pounding.
The bottle fell on Adam and then Rob who sent it gyrating to point at Seb who simply said "I’m out now," got up and minced across the room well aware how his black jockstrap contrasted with his pale skin and white tee shirt. The game was over. Ben put on his shirt and trousers, sat on the sofa with Guy while everyone else flopped out in chairs. It was nearing three. Outside there was a glimmer in the east heralding the early dawn. Everyone was exhausted. The party had come to its natural conclusion.
"Time for bed," said Marc. With Tom, Seb, Rob and Daniel there he was immediately whisked in his mind back to Buckton and the end of the Friday evening mentoring sessions. Adam, ever mindful of his responsibilities as the organiser, helped Rob and Daniel to bring their things in from their car and showed them to their rooms. The party broke up and everyone said good night.
It was not long before complete silence reigned over Oddstones. Complete silence? Not quite. For those who had not fallen into an immediate slumber might have heard the movement of Seb as he made for Marc's room. His idea of getting undressed for bed was to take off the two socks he was wearing while keeping on the tee shirt and jockstrap. This was Marc's night and he was determined they should both enjoy it. Moving in the other direction was Guy on his way to Ben's room. He had invested a lot of effort in this evening and was about to reap the dividend.

XXXIII

It was seven o'clock and Marc was sitting in the kitchen over a cup of coffee and the Daily Telegraph crossword. He always got up at much the same time even after a heavy night and the bright sun in a clear blue sky was reflected in his mood. He had left Seb in bed asleep, put on his step-ins and come downstairs. It still was not unusual for them to sleep together still. Marc enjoyed feeling Seb's naked body next to his and found it no way at odds with sleeping with Elly, just different. At that moment Ben came in dressed in a pair of shorts and a tee shirt looking equally bright-eyed and bushy-tailed. Now that they were both full grown the casual observer might have mistaken them for twins despite the five years difference in age. Closer observation would have revealed a difference in the colour of their eyes.
"You look cheerful," remarked Marc.
"What a night. Normally you would say you couldn't remember what had happened. It's quite the opposite with me. I remember everything in detail."
"What did you think of Guy?" Marc had not missed much the previous evening, he never did, and now he was probing.
"What a hot boy! He showed me a thing or two I'd never dreamt of." The two brothers had always been candid with one another.
"Go on."
"I was just dozing off when there was a knock at my door. Before I could get out of bed or even say anything it opened and in came Guy. 'I thought you might want this.' he said. It was my pen. 'You left it in the restaurant.' He came and sat on my bed and at first just talked. I was fascinated. I hardly noticed what he was doing with his hands until finally he lifted the duvet and climbed under with me. And after that it was like magic."
"Is that your first time?"
"With another lad? Yes. I'd never even thought of it before and now I feel great this morning."
"You? I'd never have thought it, either. Welcome to the club," and Marc took his brother in his arms and hugged him. "What do you want for breakfast?"
"A full fry-up, okay? And by the way, I didn't take a pen to the restaurant!"
The others appeared in dribs and drabs. Marc had appointed himself cook and provided whatever they wanted. Despite the previous night they all had hearty appetites even if they were themselves a little jaded. About ten Jessica turned up and after a cup of tea took Adam off. Slowly the party broke up until Marc and Seb were left on their own. In a secluded corner of the garden they sat swinging together on the sun lounger and with odd murmurs of conversation enjoyed the warmth of the sun.
They were both in nostalgic mood. A combination of sun and gin and tonic made them talkative. "It’s odd," started Marc, "how our lives have become inextricably involved. All right, I know you worked your butt off to get to Cambridge."
"That was because of you, Marc, because I wanted to be with you and also at school you taught me to work."
"So you ended up at my college just as I came back from my year abroad, taking the same course as me!"
"You know you had made such a good impression there that they encouraged applications from Buckton."
"I do now, but I wouldn't have known that as an undergrad. I'd bought Oddstones, so it seemed the obvious thing for you to come and share with me."
"Then Elly came up when I returned from the year abroad," continued Seb, "and we all got organised when she moved in. Anyway, I wouldn't have been without her for the world."
"I’ll drink to that," said Marc casually lifting his glass of G&T to his lips, "and look what it’s led to."
"Do you remember that first week in Maurach, Marc?"
"How could I forget?"
"Over the years I've come to realise what a little schemer I was. It probably all seemed to have happened by chance to you. The only part that fortune played was joining in with my plan."
"How many years have we known each other?" interjected Marc, "and I still underestimate you." Seb continued. "If I'm honest, I suppose after the Guy experience I came to Buckton looking for a continued sex life, but among my contemporaries. However, I became so infatuated with you that sex came second to love. Even so I did spend most of that first autumn term at Buckton working out how I could seduce you. After prep school I didn't dare try it on at Buckton. I don't think Dad would have been quite so supportive a second time, particularly because of his love of the place."
"That didn’t worry you that summer term on the last night." Marc giggled at the thought.
"That was different."
"How?" Marc's question remained unanswered.
"Then there was the House Christmas party, you know, the fancy dress one when I came dressed as a ballerina. I was sitting on your lap and you didn't know what to do with your hands. So that was a huge failure." He gave a stage sigh. "I nearly got to the point of shoving your hand up my tutu, but at that moment we had to go and eat. Then over Christmas Mum and Dad made the suggestion I took a friend on holiday with us. The rest was easy. From then on I had it worked out to the last detail, but one, and how could I know we would be sent off to the annexe to sleep? I knew the annexe was there because we'd used the pool and the sauna, but before that I'd always stayed in the family suite with the others. Anyway, it all fell into place. I'd given myself certain objectives. As I've already told you I was scared of frightening you off, but even that worked out amazingly smoothly."
Marc put his arm round Seb and pulled him closer to him. They both took a sip from their G&Ts. Marc thought back to how naïve he had been in those days. Even after three years of boarding school he still hadn't had a physical relationship with anyone and in the lower sixth he slowly realised how experienced Seb was by contrast despite being over two years younger. He had never regretted falling in love and giving himself to Seb. He felt that the experience had only ever enriched his life. In the ensuing silence Marc recalled the week in Maurach and went over it in detail in his mind. For Seb it had hinged on the Sunday night, for Marc, however, on their intimate talk together in the Goldener Apostel, but even he had not realised the extraordinarily willing victim of Seb's charm and scheming he had become. As they sat there together on the sun lounger with their eyes closed Seb's voice spoke as if from another world as he took up the narrative.
"You remember we got there on a Saturday. Well, the first night you’re always knackered from the journey, so we went to bed early, slept through till morning and there was no point trying anything on. You see, I remember I had three aims: to see you without any clothes on. Despite my efforts at school, like the late shower, you had never taken the hint. The sauna was the fail-safe method. Secondly I needed to sleep with you in order to reach my third objective to seduce you. One was simple, two was make or break, and fortunately it was make, and three then followed on from there and our heart to heart in the pub.
"The sauna was amazing. Stripped off you were even hunkier than me. How I controlled myself and didn't get an instant stiffy I'll never know to this day. Throughout the previous six months I just had to think of you in a certain way to harden up. I knew the risk, but it made it even more worthwhile going on to the next stage."
"Then Sunday night you climbed into bed with me. You know, that was the first time I'd ever slept with anyone? It was just nice holding your body. I felt ever so possessive. And as you said on the Monday night when we were having a drink, it was a try-on and I hadn't kicked you out."
"In the morning you kissed me on the forehead and if that wasn’t a come-on signal I don't know what is, which meant that Monday night I would get my wicked way."
"And I made it easier by rolling back the duvet and inviting you to climb into my bed. How marvellous hindsight is."
"And I nearly ruined it by drinking too much beer!"
As Marc had got to know Seb better over that year he realised that he took his clothes off at the slightest excuse and would sleep in the buff unless convention demanded otherwise - school fire-drill, company. He now knew that on the Saturday night Seb had given in to wearing shorts and a tee shirt in bed, but after the sauna on the Sunday afternoon they (or perhaps more precisely Marc) realised that they had nothing to hide and plenty to gain if neither of them wore anything in bed for the rest of the week. So on that Sunday evening two naked bodies lay under the duvet. Seb had built into his plan the fact that he would have to take the lead.
Meanwhile the sun had slipped round farther to the west as they had been reminiscing on the sun lounger. Seb was stretched out across Marc who was still sitting upright. Neither could be bothered to cook. So Seb fetched another long G&T each before they went in, showered and wandered along the lane to the village inn for dinner. Over dinner they continued their conversation about their first experiences together, in Maurach, at Buckton College and on holiday in France. The day was savoured, as over the remaining two Marc's time would be taken up in the final preparations. With Ben as his best man he knew that he was in capable hands.
The wedding day arrived and was a great success, fully supported by Old Bucktonians. In time the first born arrived, identical twin boys. What better opportunity than to invite Mr Bell, who had keenly followed both Marc's and Seb's careers through Cambridge, to be godfather to the one and, however incestuous it might sound, Seb to be godfather to the other.
And so life continued in happiness and good fortune. What had started as a schoolboy friendship between the sons of two sets of parents originally unknown to each other had grown into marriage between their sons and the daughters and a sharing of the grandchildren.

PART TWO

I

The first week in July had simply flown past. After Ben had left Oddstones on that Wednesday morning he fully focused his thoughts and actions on the coming weekend when his brother's wedding would take place and at which he was to be the best man. His mind had no time to consider the confusion it had been plunged into at the stagnight. It was simply stored for the time being.
On Saturday Marc's and Elly's wedding proceeded smoothly and Ben could justly feel proud of the efforts he had made on his brother's behalf. While the bride and groom left on their honeymoon late in the afternoon it was midnight before the party broke up and he shared a taxi back to Oddstones with Seb. They needed to relax before they went to bed and with those two alone in the house it was inevitable where the conversation between these brothers-in-law twice over should lead, to the one thing they now had in common besides the family, sport and their long friendship.
Ben would be twenty-three years of age later that year. He had been out of university for twelve months during which he took a post teaching maths in an East Anglian prep-school that had also provided him with a bachelor flat. He had enjoyed his year there where he could also pursue his sporting interests. He was even better generally at games than his elder brother and had decided to take a teaching qualification specialising in sport to add to his maths degree. He therefore had three months of leisure in front of him and a pied-à-terre until the end of August. It had been his good fortune that school had broken up on the last Friday of June as that enabled him to apply himself fully to the task of giving his brother a good send-off into married life.
Ben had passed through school unscathed. He had loved his five years at Buckton College where he developed both academically and on the gamesfield. No way did he feel in the shadow of his elder brother whose reputation had, however, smoothed the path for him and he had finished his career there as Head of School. During that time he had enjoyed the company of his best friend Adam, destined from as early an age as thirteen to marry Ben's sister Jessica, which had happened earlier in the year.
After school Ben spent three years reading maths at Durham and while to assert his independence he did not maintain the family tradition of Cambridge, he had followed the other family tradition of gaining a first. The most extrovert of the three children he enjoyed a full social life and broke many women undergraduates' heart for he rivalled Marc as a handsome young man and was the object of many a girl's desire. Unsure on graduating about any career he was offered a post at short notice at the East Anglian prep school which brought him to the area where his brother and sister and future in-laws lived. He had taken to teaching and this made him decide he would seek a professional qualification at the university in Cambridge.
Also, being such an extrovert, he did not think much about his own existence and consequently it ran without a hitch; that is until the stagnight when he met Guy and with a complete absence of any resistance, physical, mental or emotional, was seduced by him. Because of the business of the impending wedding he had had little time to talk to Marc whose experience he would have valued, indeed little time to think any more about it until now, after the celebrations, and being driven back to Oddstones had so vividly switched his mind back to the previous Tuesday night. At last in the small hours of Sunday morning he could finally chill out and furthermore in the company of his brother's boyfriend.
As soon as he had arrived indoors Seb went off to his apartment to discard the morning suit and cravat and when he re-appeared he had slipped into a tee shirt and shorts. Ben raided the fridge and returned to the living room with two glasses and a couple of cans, one of which he offered to Seb. He slumped into an armchair, kicked off his shoes, loosened his cravat and poured himself beer.
At first the conversation was about the wedding - the funny hats, the in-laws who were already in-laws, about who had got drunk and who was flirting with whom until Ben plucked up the courage to say, "Seb, can I ask you about Guy?"
"What do you want know?"
"Marc told me a bit, you know, how he was a good friend of yours." He hesitated. "Well, I slept with him after the stagnight, or rather he slept with me." Seb raised his eyebrows and a broad grin spread across his face.
"You? Never."
"Didn't you know?"
"He kept that quiet. He's not usually so reticent about his conquests, as you might have gathered over dinner on Tuesday." There was a silence as Seb continued grinning to himself, his mind obviously running riot. "You know, I still can’t quite believe it. You, the one who can twist every adoring girl round his little finger."
"But that's the odd thing. I enjoyed it - my first time with a bloke and I enjoyed it and now I come to think of it, I never really enjoyed my time with girls at university. I did it because it was the thing to do."
Seb could see that Ben was wrestling for some explanation of his own behaviour. "And now, are you going to come out?"
"Not at the moment. I'm still a bit confused and I want to be certain. I'll need to talk to Marc, too."
Ben slumped back into the armchair and the conversation lapsed. Both young men savoured their beer. Only, Ben's eyes were looking at Seb, looking at him in a way they had never looked at him before. Fully aware Seb pretended to take no notice. However, he slowly shifted on the sofa, using his years of experience to recline there in a most provocative way. He was testing Ben, or was he teasing him?
Ben's mood was mellowing as he relaxed. He said he was going to change and came back in a pair of step-ins. Seb sat there immobile as Ben came and sat beside him on the sofa. For Seb it was a reversal of rôles after his first House Christmas party at Buckton College when he had sat himself on Marc's lap. He reminisced, telling Ben stories from his schooldays. Ben knew most of the characters involved and giggled as he listened to them. Some he had heard before, some he hadn't.
"Didn't you have any experiences at school?" enquired Seb. "I remember you were considered a bit of a lush. Quite a few lads had a crush on you."
Ben thought. "Not really." He took another sip of beer. "I remember one boy called Jackman - all body odour. He wanted to play me at snooker. That was during my first week there. He was in the sixth form. When we got to the snooker room it was empty and the first thing he did was to get up me against the wall and try and unzip my flies. I belted him and had no trouble from him after that. We had quite a discussion about that at our mentor meeting. I can remember that."
"Yes, and I can remember he had a black eye round about then. I didn’t realise it was you, though." They both laughed and Seb told him about the time he had tried something similar on him and how he had ended up by locking Jackman in the snooker room.
"There was one other time," Ben recollected. "It was in the fourth form in the queue for lunch. There was quite a crowd in the corridor and I suddenly felt this hand between my legs touching me up. It was a third former, I'm sure, and oddly I liked it."
"And more significantly you still remember it," interjected Seb.
"Mmm, that’s true," pondered Ben, "but before I could do anything the queue had moved on and I never did find out who did it. But there's the difference. Unlike that occasion with Jackman this time I didn't mind. As I say I quite enjoyed it really. Now I wish I had known. With hindsight I might have followed it up."
They continued talking about school and the family holidays they had spent together, laughing and giggling at some of the jolly japes they had got up to until exhaustion suddenly took over. Ben's heart started pounding as he plucked up his courage. "Seb, can I sleep with you tonight?" There was no hesitation in the reply.
"I think not. There’s only one person I want to sleep with and sister Elly's got priority tonight." Ben blushed. "Don’t worry. I’m flattered really, but you'll find this out in time. If you are gay, it's not the cheap thrill you're after. It's a loving relationship. It took Marc and me almost six months before we slept together. And nothing else happened on the first night, either. Guy's a different kettle of fish. He's promiscuous, or to put it another way a randy old goat, not to mention a smooth operator. If it's there, he'll get it one way or the other. But we’re not all like him."
They parted amicably and said good night with a hug. But that just left Ben feeling even more frustrated.

II

Next morning they both got up late, unusual for Ben who was normally keen to get on with the God-given day, but the past week had exhausted him, emotionally more than physically. A sociable creature by nature, he appreciated having the family there, and that included the in-laws who seemed more like blood brothers and sister to him and so with both families around he had been in his element. Over a spartan breakfast he challenged Seb to a gentle jog round the lanes. Their talk in the early hours of the morning had sparked off the wicked side of Seb's sense of humour and brought back how he had teased Marc during their 'courtship'. He accepted the challenge without a second thought and went to get changed. And what was he wearing on his return to the kitchen? A snug singlet over those very same white knee-length, body-hugging, see-through shorts under which his packet, supported in a black jockstrap with the straps visibly crossing his buttocks, was obvious to the world in general and Ben in particular. He pretended to ignore Ben's sharp intake of breath and as they proceeded on their chosen route he would stop from time to time to perform erotic and provocative body-stretching exercises, all the while paying no heed to his jogging-partner's obvious delight and by the time they returned to Oddstones even Ben's more modest sportskit could not disguise the overall effect Seb had had.
After a quick shower and change they wandered down to the village pub to meet the remaining members of the family for Sunday lunch. After that everyone came back to Oddstones for a relaxing afternoon before splitting up to go and carry on with their normal lives, conducting their own affairs from Monday morning. Jessica and the two mothers worked particularly hard providing tea and in the meantime putting Oddstones back into reasonable shape, for until Elly and Marc came back from their honeymoon it would still have a particular bachelor atmosphere about it. Seb had another two weeks' leave until he went off to Berlin on five months' secondment from his firm. Meanwhile Elly and Marc would be able to settle down to their routine. Elly would start her new job on the 1 August and Seb would return to his apartment in December in time for Christmas. So come Monday morning Ben was on his way back to his accommodation at the prep school where technically he was employed until the end of August.

III

The first week of October arrived. Ben had spent an interesting summer. Through a contact of Seb's he had gained some freelance work as a photographic model. He had been taken on by the agency for his very lack of experience in the modelling world and naturally for his extremely well honed physique. He did of course meet a number of entertaining people who were only to ready to help him develop his newly discovered sexuality, but he had taken his brother-in-law's advice and while enjoying their company socially he had no further contact. He was now getting used to seeing pictures of himself in fashion magazines and even in one instance his appearance on the back of buses. Most of September he spent walking in the Alps with friends from university, then returned to Cambridge afterwards to take up residence for his year in college.
The term started with the usual confusion of getting to know new people, going back to lectures after eighteen months' freedom from them and a return to the discipline of having to write essays, although compared to his undergraduate studies this course proceeded at a leisurely pace. He quickly fitted into a small circle socially and was to some extent relieved to find that he was not surrounded by a group of PE hearties as the course encompassed all teaching disciplines and the college accommodated undergraduates on various courses. For a change he would occasionally dine in with his brother Marc at his college. The usual student social life was available, but after a year out he found that he had really outgrown it. Within his own social circle he was surrounded by adoring women and always managed to act courteously towards them and occasionally go out with them without getting involved. The fact that he had been a model just added to his kudos. He did not join any of the sports clubs for he knew that the sporting commitment at school would make him unavailable for most of the season. It would not be long till the end of schools' half term when he would start seven weeks of teaching practice. Indeed what had attracted him to the course was the two periods of TP with the theory sandwiched in the middle term.
Ben had been allocated to the Mythe School, a local boys' independent day school. A year in a prep school had convinced him he wanted to teach seniors. Some of his fellow students had been sent much farther afield to boarding schools where they were expected to live in. He would not be alone for one other student had been sent to the same school, a chemist that he had yet to meet, but whom he would hunt out at the earliest opportunity. After the final briefing he found out who he was. He was a young Scotsman named Lewis who had been living out, but with one or two rooms becoming vacant over TP he had applied to move into the spare accommodation in college. The college course finished Thursday lunchtime to permit a long weekend for those who had to travel. On the following Monday things began in earnest.
Ben could walk from college to his school. He did own a car, but because of the restrictions on parking he kept it at Oddstones under Marc's care. If he needed it, it was easy enough to beg a lift from his brother or sister-in-law, or at worst catch a bus to the local village and hoof it to Oddstones from there.
Finally teaching practice was here. For Ben it had not come soon enough. Specialising in sport he spent most lessons either in the sportshall or on the gamesfield, but he did teach a little maths and he sat in on the theory lessons for GCSE sports studies. He was pleased to have Lewis as company. Lewis spent most of his time in the labs, but had indicated a willingness to help out with games. Therefore they had something in common from the start. By coincidence they had also recently become neighbours in college as Lewis had moved into an adjacent room on his floor.
Ben threw himself into school life heart and soul. He found it refreshing to be tackling a new subject, namely physical education as opposed to his degree subject of maths. He knew straightaway he had made the right choice in changing from prep to senior school. He got on well with the pupils and found them a friendly bunch, but no self-respecting PE master ever has trouble anyway. He always has the whip hand. Again it did not take long before he was recognised for having a 'face like the back of a bus' from his modelling days which made the boys believe they had a celebrity amongst them. Even so he was a little surprised to find himself the object of hero-worship, and in one case perhaps a crush, for it was not as if he had been a county or England star as two of the PE staff had been. Saturdays were in theory school-free days, but he always found himself involved somehow with a rugby team, often the dizzy heights of the 4th XV, either refereeing or looking after it. Strangely he did discover that he had one thing in common with his brother Marc. He enjoyed the smell of a boys' changing-room, liniment and all. It went no further than that. It did not worry him, to the extent that he unhesitatingly told Lewis during a chat one evening over a beer. Lewis said nothing, but his face indicated he was neither shocked nor surprised and the conversation continued its natural flow.
Over the second half of that term Ben and Lewis were fast becoming firm friends. They would go to the cinema or theatre, jog, visit the gym, even occasionally be invited out to Oddstones together for dinner or Sunday lunch.
The Education Department students naturally had to stay behind after everyone else had gone down in order to complete the school term. By the end of seven weeks at the worst time of the year the two lads were exhausted. Ben had managed to gain an alpha minus for his teaching practice, and those were not given out lightly. He enjoyed the end of term celebrations at school and was summoned by the Headmaster to be thanked personally for the contribution he had made. However, the greatest surprise was to be told that a junior maths post would become available in the following September and that he might like to consider making an application. It would be advertised at the beginning of February, but he should not be too disappointed if he did not get it. That gave Ben something to think about. After all, teaching practice was a time of making mistakes and being able to walk away from them, but jobs in a school where you knew you fitted in were few and far between.
So Lewis returned to Glasgow for New Year and Ben returned to his parents, initially in the west country, for Christmas, but with the majority of the family now living in Cambridgeshire there was a lot of travelling during the festive season. Seb was back from his spell of work in Berlin which meant that the family was once again re-united. Ben also had gained himself a breathing space to think about his own future, but that would depend really on where he ended up teaching.

IV

A new year, a new eight-week term and back to college for the theory of education. Ben had spent a full holiday socially, that is to say after collapsing for the first few days from the strain and tiredness of teaching. However, he soon bounced back and joined in the festivities fully. Now for the difficult part. He was, though, pleased that the theory would be tested right at the beginning of the summer term so that he did not have to worry about TP and theory examinations, as well as simultaneously searching for a post.
He found the course quite concentrated, but not so time-consuming as TP. He was a disciplined worker and provided he worked conscientiously during the week he could use Saturday morning or afternoon for catching up and have the rest of the weekend free. After all, hadn't they been told at the beginning of the course that the PGCE was a form of relaxation after their undergraduate years? During TP Ben had been pretty single-minded, but this term he had widened his activities and begun enjoying himself. It was already February, one of those weekends when there is a hint of Spring in the air, but also one when coincidentally most people disappear for a long weekend. He and Lewis were the only students left on their landing. They were used to doing things together and had fixed up to go off for a game of squash at ten o'clock. The courts were equally abandoned and they had no reason to keep strictly to their hour.
The weather had definitely put Ben in high spirits and a spring in his step. Everything appeared lighter, cleaner and more interesting under a blue sky and bright sunshine. And for some reason that applied to Lewis who looked sharp in his white squash kit. Lewis did not live up to the Flanders and Swann image of a hairy Scotsman. Under jet black hair he had bright blue eyes and fair skin. Slightly shorter than Ben he had a neat, slim, well-proportioned body. He always dressed in smart, well-fitting clothes of noticeable quality. Ben admired his physique and often gave more than a casual glance at the cut of his trousers, or today his white shorts. And Lewis knew it. It was almost as if he dressed to please Ben and over the few months they had known each other he had unconsciously started to adopt Lewis' sense of fashion.
Today something happened to Ben, inside, in the pit of his stomach, in the area of his heart. Their games of squash were always competitive, usually with Ben finally gaining a hard fought victory. But this morning he could not concentrate, or rather he could not concentrate on his game, for his singlemindedness was forcing him to concentrate on Lewis, the way he moved about the court, his various body positions and the teasing smile he gave when he realised he was the centre of attention. Thus there came a time when Ben realised he was truly beaten and that there was no chance of hauling a game back. They shook hands and went off to shower and then it happened. Ben was washing his hair when he suddenly had to turn to the wall and turn the cold water on. He had finally lost control of the attraction he felt for Lewis. Lewis pretended not notice at first and blithely continued to soap himself up with shower gel, but then he unhooked the showerhead and started spraying Ben. His passion had started to subside, but he still couldn't hide the fact he had been aroused, and to cover his erstwhile embarrassment joined in the horseplay until he got Lewis in a wrestling hold that forced them both to stop, look each other in the eyes and realise that Ben was not alone in his excitement. He released Lewis, they smiled at one another and continued their ablutions as if nothing had happened. They dried themselves off, dressed, wandered back to their rooms, confirmed their arrangements for the rest of the day and went off to do their own thing.

V

Ben walked into the city to do some shopping, still on a high under the influence of bright sun, blue sky and crisp refreshing air. If it had been dull he might have sulked at losing his squash match, but he had long forgotten the game and was exhilarated by what had been awakened within him. Was this love? Although twenty-three years of age he had never experienced such a feeling, but at the back of his mind were conversations he had had with Marc who had experienced similar feelings within himself all those years ago. He wanted to catch the bus and go and see him, but then he remembered. He and Elly were down in the west country with his parents for the weekend. What about Seb? He took his mobile out of its holster and dialled Oddstones. Voicemail! He didn't feel he could leave a message like that. Adam and Jessica? They wouldn't understand. (Little did he know! After all they had grown up with their elder brothers in full knowledge of their propensities.) He crossed the road and went into the botanical gardens, found a bench by the hardy geranium beds and sat down.
By nature he was not introspective. Marc was. That's why Marc had become a man of letters and he'd become a mathematician. He applied the cold logic of mathematics and it worked. One, for years his interest in girls had not exceeded beyond the social. He had never had a fulfilling relationship with a girl. Two, back in the previous summer, to no greater surprise than his own, he had been seduced by Guy and enjoyed it to such an extent he then wanted to try it on with his brother-in-law. Three, he consequently thought back to Seb's advice. If you are gay, you want a relationship as much as heterosexual people and you don't climb into bed with the first person that comes along. Four, his mind advanced to thinking about Lewis, the odd things he said, the odd way he sometimes behaved. As mentioned, he had not got to know Lewis until half way through the first term at Cambridge. He had been one of the crowd. They had shared the general lectures and gone to different subject lectures. Of course there had been no point of contact. Then it was almost as if fate had intervened to bring them together. They had been allocated to the same school. At the same time Lewis had moved into a room on the same landing in college. They had been fellow students, then colleagues as it were and as they got to know one another in school they became friends with interests in common, and as friends had started to have more intimate conversations.
It had come out casually that neither of them had much interest in girls - no more than that, no insinuations on either side. Lewis was a stylish dresser, not trendy, but stylish, and he had started to influence Ben in the way he dressed, too, even to the comparative merits of various kinds of underwear, a refinement of the briefs versus boxers argument, a subject that they found they had little disagreement about. In their conversations they would unobtrusively touch one another on the arm, on the shoulder, on the knee and as they became more familiar on the buttocks, and Ben was not a great one for physical contact outside sport or the family, either. And only just that moment had this occurred to him. They had both talked about pupils they taught while on TP, and furthermore it had been the same pupils they had become interested in and finally it dawned on Ben that it was not their intellects which had made them topics of conversation, but their physiques, their appearances, or dare he say it, their attractiveness. Ben had never thought deeply about why he had taken his PGCE in physical education rather than maths, but sat there on a park bench he traced his thoughts back a year to the time when, while teaching at the prep school, he had made his application.
He had enjoyed his year at the prep school, but knew there and then it was not fulfilling. He put it down to the enclosed world of a typical prep school. He enjoyed teaching boys of all ages. There had been some rather sharp minds there, even among the eight year olds, but it was the thirteen year olds he liked teaching most. They were clever and competitive, out to give him a run for his money. He met them on the gamesfield and in their boarding house. They had reached that age when they change from being small boys into lusty youths and it was in their company he felt most at home. He took an interest in their breaking voices, their growth spurts and, he realised now though not at the time, their developing sexuality. He had never wanted more than just to be in their company. He had acted professionally and with all propriety, but now he knew what had made him feel so at home in a school. Returning to his teaching practice it became clear to him that he had unwittingly given extra attention to boys of a certain type, the handsome, the well-developed and particularly when combined with a lively wit or a lively mind.
Ben had exhausted that train of thought and went on to think about the way Marc had grown up. Not having been at Buckton College at the same time he could not know all the details, but eventually he did come to learn how Marc pined in the holidays and as he got to know Seb some of the mental turmoil which Marc had suffered, but which Seb had escaped. And the difference? Seb knew he was gay; Marc had to make the painful discovery. However, once each had come to terms with the fact the way forward seemed easier, life simpler. Was there a clue here? "Tonight I am going out with Lewis. It could be make or break."
Despite the Spring sun in the clear blue sky sitting on the park bench had chilled him and he needed to get going. He was starving. Wasn't this a good sign as lovers were meant to lose their appetite? He walked towards the city centre, spurned MacDonald's and took a snack in the one of the department store restaurants. He felt there was still a reserve of adrenalin in his body, ready for action later that day, a leftover from the shower that morning. You know, if conditions were right this evening he was going to go for it. After all, he was no longer a virgin. Guy had seen to that. "QED" said the sporty mathematician, or was it the mathematically inclined sportsman?

VI

Ben did what he had to do in town which included a browse round the clothes shops and having his hair cut. On a whim he had it cut shorter than usual which made him look more boyish. He was pleased with the effect. Then he wandered back to his college. He had planned to finish off a health education essay that afternoon. Afterwards he would meet Lewis at seven. They would go out to dinner and then on to the cinema for a late showing of Billy Elliot.
The essay finished he went and soaked in the bath for an hour, luxuriating in a heady solution of bath oils and using an advanced conditioner on his hair. He was determined to look his best that evening. Before dressing he stood in front of the mirror, not to admire himself, something which had not been unknown in the past, but to trim any excess body hair, really a figment of his imagination for he could never be described as particularly hirsute. He anointed himself with body oils and subtly scented potions - all Christmas presents of course - and chose each article of clothing from his undergear outwards with the utmost care. He pulled on the brand new white Hom Ho1 slip he had selected, adjusted himself and continued to dress. One of his assignments had been to model this garment and he had immediately fallen in love with it mainly because its horizontal fly gave easy access and easily turned petting into heavy petting. Afterwards he had been given a dozen pairs as perks of the job and he found he loved the soft cotton and the design which held him so well. In his loose dark grey trousers he was displaying his well-formed packet most advantageously. He would always admire any well-formed packet, whether his own or other guys’, but found that for his taste a bulge in loose trousers was that much hotter than its equal in tight ones. There only remained his hair which was subjected to the styling mousse. The experience gained as a photographic model had not been wasted and when the knock on his door came at seven he stepped out with style. Ben could see straightaway that Lewis was impressed and the reason for this extra effort was not lost on him after the morning’s events. Indeed, Lewis too had made that extra effort and the new trousers he wore fitted precisely in all the right places. They put on their long flowing cashmere winter overcoats and left.
They went to one of Lewis' favourite restaurants hidden away in the backstreets of Cambridge. Downstairs it was a normal pub used more by town than gown. However, upstairs was a cosy restaurant. Ben had not been there before. He had left the choice to Lewis knowing he could depend on his impeccable taste to make the right one. The restaurant was dominated by a huge open grate in which burnt a large log fire, welcome on an evening where the still blue skies of the day had brought with it a typical fen-country frost. The tables were arranged between large winged wooden pew-like seats amply provided with cushions and each with an intimacy of its own. Lewis had obviously been here before and on booking had made a deliberate selection of the table to be reserved. The tables were candle lit, but instead of being on the tables the holders were mounted on the walls. In the middle of the table stood a narrow vase containing a single red rose. At first its significance escaped Ben until it dawned on him it was the fourteenth day of the month and knowing the symbolism of the said flower he tortured himself in deciding whether it was sheer coincidence and only by looking round at the other tables did he realise how naïve he had been. It made the evening that more exciting for him, gave him palpitations, that feeling in the pit of his stomach and a heaviness in his loins. He plucked the rose from its vase, savoured its perfume in appreciation and handed it to Lewis that he might follow suit.
The conversation flowed freely. In fact they talked about themselves and Ben learnt more about Lewis that evening than he had ever found out over the last two months. He discovered how cultured he was. He talked about music, literature, art. He mentioned names such as Tippett, Britten, Isherwood, Spender, Wilde, Gide, O'Neill and Michelangelo. Thomas Mann he knew from his brother's academic work and it was not long before he discovered what these artists had in common. Lewis' thesis described how only the frustrations of the male could produce great art and not uncultured himself, even if not familiar with some of the names he heard, Ben appreciated the discourse and discovered an intellectual depth in his dining partner as yet unfathomed as he sat there listening enraptured. Yet the conversation was not all one way for as the alcohol coursed through their veins Ben felt he could open up about himself. The food, traditional English fare, was ordered, served and consumed. He talked first about his family and their intermarriage with the shared in-laws. Lewis led him on to talk about himself, his feelings, his passions and so skilled was Lewis' art of getting Ben to talk that he could induce him to bring up the one topic he was burning to know about, his physical show of passion after squash that morning. Time passed without their noticing until they sat back intellectually and gastronomically replete over a brandy. Ben had opened his heart, talked about Marc's stagnight, was even more amazed when he heard that Lewis had actually come across Guy when he spent a fortnight on an exchange at King Edward's from his school in Scotland, though he divulged little more. By now they were leaning over the table, their faces less than six inches apart, talking, when Ben unobtrusively held Lewis' hand. The hand slowly twisted and opened up maintaining the grip and eventually Ben felt his palm being stroked. In full recognition he returned the signal.
Ben had already booked the seats for the cinema earlier in the day so that there would be no need to queue, but finally it was time to pay the bill and make their way. They might just miss the adverts and the trailers. The high of the morning had continued into the evening.
They reached their seats in the back row of the circle with a couple of minutes to spare. They divested themselves of their winter coats and settled down to watch the film. Surprisingly neither of them had seen it immediately after its release and they were pleased to catch it on a re-run. It was not long until Ben felt an arm round his shoulder and pushing up the arm rest between them he snuggled closer to Lewis and eventually took hold of his other hand as it rested in his lap. Ben had not felt so relaxed in ages which aided his full enjoyment of the film. Once it was over they donned their overcoats again and walked briskly back to college to be let in by the night porter.
On the landing Lewis said "I’ve got a special malt whisky that you won't get in England. Would you like a wee dram?" This made Ben's alternative offer of coffee and biscuits appear rather uninteresting and he readily accepted. Inside Lewis' room Ben sat down on the sofa. Lewis produced two glasses of the precious liquid and joined him. He took a sip and it went down like burning nectar. In his relaxed mood he slipped off his shoes and lay across the sofa with his head cradled in Lewis' lap. The external throbbing he felt in the back of his neck sent the right message.
Ben was the first to wake in the morning. Completely bare himself he felt Lewis' naked body stretched out over him. He reached down the bed and stroked his buttocks. His head was clear and it gave him pleasure to remember the past twenty-four hours in detail. After last night he would never have to turn away from Lewis again in the shower. Now there could be no secrets between them. As Lewis lay asleep still Ben carefully got out of bed, pulled on his slip and peering round the door to see if the coast was clear padded across to his own room, took off his slip, put on his dressing gown, returned to Lewis' room with a tray of coffee and biscuits and woke him with a kiss. He slipped off his dressing gown and climbed back into bed. His body felt cold against Lewis's. They drank their coffee in silence before going off to shower and then down to a buffet breakfast. Ben had not felt so great since the morning after Marc's stagnight.

VII

Ben was now in a quandary. He was due out at Oddstones for Sunday lunch and his parents were also there. When he accepted the invitation he could not have foreseen how the weekend might turn out. He could cancel, but he knew better than that. There was nothing else for it. A quick telephone call. Elly answered.
"Yes, of course you can bring Lewis." He was known to the family anyway. He leapt across to Lewis' room. The outer door was open. He knocked.
"How about lunch with the family at Oddstones?"
"Love to." And that was it. Problem solved. They would have to catch the bus, then walk, but there was one at twelve which meant they would arrive by quarter to one at the latest.
On the way to the bus station they had some serious talking to do. What would they say about their newly established relationship?
"Nothing," said Lewis rather masterfully. "They know we're friends. We don't have to tell them we jumped into bed together last night. You said you don't want to come out yet. Fair enough."
"But what about you, Lewis?"
"I haven't said a lot. We're still getting to know each other, but I came out at the age of fourteen." Ben's jaw dropped and then he smiled.
"You’re a dark horse."
Meanwhile they had reached the bus station and climbed onto the bus. They sat together on the back seat. There were few other passengers.
"It was no big deal," continued Lewis. "The hard part is knowing for certain and even these days you need to be discreet, especially in our profession. They can conveniently forget our 'human rights', even though we have committed no crime. You just have to remember the Woolworth's rule - you can look, but you're not allowed to touch - and we still have freedom of thought, just, despite the PC crowd."
"Tell me how you did it," rejoined Ben.
"I will, but not now. When we're both in the right mood some time." If it hadn't before it was just dawning on Ben that he was dealing with a past master. Despite the experiences within the family he was just the new kid on the block.
During this conversation they had arrived at the village and were wandering along the lanes to Oddstones. Yesterday's crisp high pressure had given way to a damp and overcast, though warmer day. A breeze had sprung up and occasionally they could feel rain in the wind. The door was opened by Elly and they were greeted in the hall by Marc and Seb. A curious electricity sparked between them, an odd form of recognition. Marc and Seb had met Lewis before, but today a kind of sixth sense or telepathy was at work which seemed to increase the warmth of the welcome. Having taken off their outer garments they were led into the large sitting room and Ben could introduce Lewis to his parents.
For lunch seven of them sat round a large dining table. The roast pork was a Marc & Elly co-production. The parents had been banned from the kitchen, though Seb seemed to have free access. In fact he was a very good factotum, opening wine bottles, pouring beer, laying the table. Until the meal was served Lewis and Ben could talk to the parents over sherry. Marc carved the joint, symbolically master in his own house. It was three before they left the table when coffee was served. Time was getting short for Marc's and Ben's parents as they had to drive back to the west country and wanted to leave while it was still light until they reached the main roads. As they were collecting their things together, Ben and Lewis took over the washing-up and when the parents finally left the whole family plus Lewis were gathered to wave them goodbye. The wind had increased and now the rain had started with a vengeance.
The time passed so congenially that it was rather late when they thought of having tea. Usually on these occasions Marc would give his brother a lift back into town. When Elly went to get the tea, Seb took Lewis off to show him his apartment. Marc and Ben were left alone in the sitting-room. It was Ben who started the conversation. He told his brother about the previous evening.
"Since your stagnight I have had to rethink my whole life and now this confirms the conclusion I came to. Still, while he's been a close friend for over three months now, that was the first time that Lewis and I had any sexual relationship. I was, I still am very fond of him simply as a friend and if I hadn't been so naïve I should have seen it coming. I've no regrets apart from being so blind before. I thought that up to yesterday I had been taking the initiative, but if I had, I lost it when I lost that squash match."
"Well, you know what happened to me. I fretted about it for months, then suddenly I felt overwhelmed and I accepted my destiny."
"How do you think Mum and Dad will take it?"
"I don't think it will be a surprise. They gradually found out about Seb and me. Not that I hid anything. It was just that I was finding out about myself gradually. They were very understanding and they know of course how similar we are in many ways. The other thing that will help, as it helped with me, is that you have been a good son and made a success of your life. After this afternoon they will be prepared. Your body language will have given something away."
"Oh, I didn't think of that."
"And a good thing too," said Marc "or you could have appeared to be acting in a very strange way."
With a clatter of cups on a tray Elly came in with the tea things. "Where are Seb and Lewis?" "They'll be down in a minute. Seb's showing him his apartment," and at that they were to be heard coming down the stairs, laughing and chatting all the way.
As the evening went on the wind had become even higher and the rain lashed against the windows. Elly said "Marc, I don't like the idea of you driving through this. That wind's strong enough to bring a tree down. What about if Ben and Lewis stayed for the night?"
"What time's your first lecture tomorrow?"
"Not till ten."
"Then I recommend you do what Elly suggests."
"You will have to share the spare room in the attic," she said. "I haven’t had time to get any of the other rooms ready, but if you don't mind you're welcome to stay." Lewis made the usual polite protestations. Ben knew that it was useless to fight his sister-in-law's determination and thanked her for her kindness. Elly took them upstairs while Marc and Seb cleared away the tea things. They were amazed at the size of the room which had been built into the loft and despite the wind outside it was warm and snug. It had an ensuite bathroom with shower and towels were laid out on the twin beds. When they returned to the sitting room Marc had the malt whisky and glasses ready. No one was going anywhere any more that night. Towards eleven o'clock it seemed a natural time to retire. The two boys (boys! Well they were the youngest of the menfolk there.) said their goodnights and in a mellow mood climbed the stairs to the attic. They knew Seb had his own wing which separated them from Marc's and Elly's part of the house. They even noticed the room had a telephone and Elly had put a tray ready for coffee in the morning. They realised without speaking how lucky they were to be spending a second night together. Ben put his arms round Lewis' waist and kissed his lips. Nothing else needed to be said. They undressed and climbed into the same bed.
At half past seven the next morning they were woken by the telephone. Lewis tumbled out of bed to answer it. Breakfast would be at eight. They showered and dressed and before going downstairs Lewis took Ben in an embrace and gave him a long kiss. They separated, Ben ruffled the other bed and swapped over the pillows and they went downstairs.

VIII

After breakfast Marc drove Elly, Lewis and Ben into Cambridge in the family space-wagon. Looking around at the state of the roads strewn with the odd debris from trees Elly repeated her conviction it had been better for the lads to stay the night. As he sat in the back with Lewis Ben could not help but think back to the stagnight when instead of Lewis Guy had sat in that same vehicle with him. That was the beginning of an adventure which this weekend had only just begun to unfold.
The two lads arrived back at their rooms in time to change and reach their ten o'clock lectures in good time. They briefly saw one another at lunchtime. With the pressure of work they decided to meet in the college bar for a beer at ten that evening. They needed to take stock. Also, on the following Thursday Ben had been summoned for interview at his teaching practice school. The letter from the Mythe was waiting for him on his return from Oddstones. So now something else had crept into the equation, something which also required some preparation. They dined in Hall but disappeared to their rooms as soon as dinner was over. At the appointed hour they went down to the bar. As it was a Monday they expected it to be fairly quiet, but sod's law dictated all their mates were there and of course they wanted to chat. Ben and Lewis ordered their pints and after five minutes of banter with the lads and a couple of ladettes took their drinks up to Ben's room.
Ben didn't know how to start, but Lewis helped him out. They both agreed on the marvellous weekend and the fact that they could not have predicted such a fortuitous outcome.
"How did we ever become so attracted to each other?" Ben enquired. Despite his family background in these matters he still possessed a certain amount of naïvety. Lewis was ready to offer an answer.
"You know I told you I came out when I was fourteen? Well, I'll tell you a little more about that in a minute, but anyway I had a few relationships while I was still at school, nothing serious, just as young lads do at that age. After the sixth form we parted and at university I got into the same sort of company. It's not difficult with a little experience and if you keep your eyes and ears open. But it was casual and no one stole my heart exactly.
"I decided to come south on graduating and was lucky enough to get a place at Cambridge. After all, it has got a certain reputation. As you know I had lodgings in town, which I didn't particularly like, especially as I didn't get to meet people, but then I had the chance of rooms in college which is what I'm used to. We were allocated the same school for TP, as well as the same landing in college. When we first met I was immediately taken by your appearance. All right, I fancied you. No more than that. I'm not in the business of conversion. That's a sure way to get a good slapping. It was only gradually that you gave away clues. You had been a photographic model. In itself that says nothing about you except that you were bound to have worked with gays and you never said anything anti. I fed in odd remarks or we discussed certain topics and you reacted in the right way. Then I got to know your family and its history, both personally when we went out to Oddstones. Of course I only actually met Seb for the first time this weekend and we took to one another immediately. We had great fun when he took me to his study. We talked about his photographs and that's when I spotted Guy. Well, that gave us something to talk about. You remember on Saturday night the coincidence that I had met him on that school exchange and I said little more? Yes, you've guessed it. He was the first person to seduce me. I won't say rape, either, because it was with full consent. He certainly knows his job well. We had a thoroughly good time and I learnt things I could only previously have dreamt of. After that, although he had had no intention previously, he wangled his way onto the return visit when one boy went down with appendicitis. So at fourteen I realised my true sexuality and came out. I was surprised how well my parents took it. I was expecting a row. And by the way Guy and I had a jolly good time during that fortnight in Glasgow as well. So now we have something else in common. We both lost our virginity to Guy.
"Then on TP we got to know one another better and better. I enjoyed working with you in those two sessions a week on the gamesfield where we had the interest in our own physiques in common, not mention those of some very pretty boys. I cherished your company and assumed you liked mine, but did not want to push it. Then this weekend it all came together. During squash you lost the match, and I must admit to some sneakiness there, then in the shower control. The rest we both know."
"Where do we go from here?" asked Ben.
"It’s early days yet," Lewis replied. "We’ve got each other definitely until the end of teaching practice next term. Then we could end up anywhere and that will be a test. The important thing will be to act discreetly. If we sleep together it will be a happy coincidence as it was this weekend. Otherwise we just share each other’s company." They looked at the clock and finished their pints. Time for bed. They embraced tightly and kissed. Lewis left and Ben took the glasses back down to the bar. He didn't want to wake up to the smell of stale beer in the morning. He was soon in bed asleep.

IX

During the rest of the week Ben had plenty to occupy his mind. With Lewis' advice accepted their relationship in public was no different from what it had been before the weekend. They might have been in and out of each other's rooms slightly more frequently, but who would notice that? Thursday was ever in the forefront of Ben’s mind, not only in preparing himself, but also making sure he could take a day out and still keep up with his work. For the evening Marc had invited him to dine as his guest in his college.
Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday at last. Ben got up, showered and took an early breakfast. He had to report to the school at 10 o'clock. Lewis popped in to say good luck just as he was changing into a sharp navy blue suit. His black shoes gleamed and Lewis waited to adjust the silk tie under the collar of Ben's pale blue shirt. Lewis gave his suit a final brush, kissed him on the cheek and took his leave. His hair was immaculate.
Ben reported at the school's reception at ten on the dot and then went to the Common Room to be greeted by colleagues whom he knew from TP and who were pleased to see him again. As he was no stranger to the school he was down for the first interview while the other candidates were given the guided tour. At lunch he had the chance to meet the others over sherry and was relieved to discover that only future NQTs had been called. It was a policy of the school to give young men a chance to enter the profession, not out of cheapness, but from a form of idealism which had been found to work. All the interviewees had gained firsts in maths at various universities and appeared quite high-powered. In fact Ben thought his only advantage was the fact that he had already taught there and perhaps, even though he thought so himself, because he was the smartest dresser (and the only ex-model!). Lunch was taken at a separate table presided over by the Second Master. Each candidate was given a chance to talk about himself informally and Ben was interested to hear the various things they all offered over and above the maths. He certainly felt at a psychological advantage having finished his formal interviews. Unlike the others he had no need to give a demonstration lesson, and he pressed this advantage home. After lunch he was free to leave, but decided to talk to staff in the Common Room and then wander down to the gamesfield to meet his TP mentor. Finally he walked back to college. He didn't even have any expenses to claim and even if he had not got the job he had spent a thoroughly enjoyable day.
Once in his room he removed his suit and shirt carefully, slipped on a pair of tracksuit bottoms and a tee shirt and went for a run which cleared the cobwebs. On his return he lay on his bed and imperceptibly fell into a deep sleep.
He was woken by a bang on the door. He had forgotten to sport his oak. It was Lewis and a couple of other mates dying to know how he had got on. He was grateful really for such a rude awakening for he only had an hour before he was due to meet Marc. After satisfying their curiosity he took a shower, climbed into his dinner suit, grabbed a gown and went off to Marc's college.
Marc ushered Ben into the Senior Common Room and offered him a glass of sherry. As a don Marc was smartly turned out in white tie. Since it was not Ben's first time there, he was no stranger, but there was one face he recognised immediately and which recognised him. He came across and said "Good evening, Ben. I hope you’ve survived the ordeal today." It was Professor Johnston, chairman of the school's board of governors. "I can’t say too much at the moment as it were, but we were all very impressed with you. Of course you had the advantage of already having a foot in the door. Better the devil you know, so they say." At that he patted Ben's bottom with one hand and Marc's with the other and to avoid any questions he might not be allowed to answer passed on discreetly to where the drinks were being served. For Ben it was not a life or death decision for he had other irons in the fire.
In a short time the assembly moved to the college hall and they took their places for dinner. It was one of those occasions when the whole college was summoned and expected. At last Marc could ask his brother about his day. Ben felt reasonably content with the way he had acquitted himself, he said, but realised he was up against strong competition. He thought that taking his PGCE in physical education with subsidiary maths had given him an advantage over the pure mathematicians, especially as it was a junior post. He was more puzzled than anything else by Professor Johnston's remark, but he put it out of his mind. Obviously the decision had already been made and lay in the Headmaster's secretary's in-tray ready for typing up.
"Which question put you on the spot most?"
"'Why do you want to teach?' was easy because I had already done it for a year. 'What special contribution to teaching here could you make?' would have been more difficult if I hadn't done TP there. I don't know really." The dinner proceeded and for Ben it was a relaxing end to a strenuous day.
"By the way I wanted to ask you. Next week Elly is off to a five day conference in Luxembourg over the weekend. She suggested to Seb and me we might like to have a bachelor weekend and wondered whether you and Lewis would be interested. Elly thought it would be quite a good idea. Would you like to come along?"
"I'm up for it. I'll ask Lewis and let you know."
"I suggest you both come back with me on the Friday evening and stop over. Then I can bring you back on Monday morning. That'll give us two complete days."
"I look forward to it."
"Well, I haven't got anything planned yet."
By now it was time for the toasts and speeches. Marc and Ben just sat back and relaxed. "One day you’ll be on your feet up there," Ben told his brother.
"I'll worry about that when it happens." Afterwards it was back to the SCR for informal post-parandial drinks and Ben finally reached his rooms just before midnight. He stripped off his clothes and fell into bed and asleep.

X

Friday at last, Poets' Day. All lectures in the Education faculty were over by lunchtime. Ben caught up with Lewis who could not contain his keenness to attend Marc's bachelor weekend at Oddstones and readily accepted the invitation. Ben was keen to use Friday to catch up the day he had missed and was only to be seen briefly at dinner before he disappeared back to his room. By ten o'clock he felt he could have a relaxing weekend without a bad conscience. After a late night the day before he decided to turn in early.
He woke at his normal time, dressed and went down to breakfast. He was keen, but did not want to appear so, to see if the morning's post had brought anything. There it was. A white DL envelope with his name and address neatly typed and postmarked Cambridge. His heart skipped a beat, but his face betrayed nothing. He took it up to his room, slit it open carefully with a paper knife and removed the contents. Sitting on his bed he read 'We are delighted to offer you an opportunity to attend our careers advice service on…' What a let-down! Still he had other fish to fry. His duel with Lewis - squash rackets at ten. After last week he had a score to settle and nothing was going to prevent him from being single-minded today.
At a quarter to ten there was a knock on the door. Ben picked up the bag with his kit and accompanied Lewis to the courts. They quickly changed and started warming up the ball. Try as he might Lewis could not distract Ben's attention as he proceeded in a clinical manner to give him a thrashing. At the end of the match they shook hands in a way that re-affirmed their relationship and went off to change. Even in the shower Ben maintained his normal cool. They parted with the arrangement to meet for a drink later that evening. Ben telephoned his brother to confirm acceptance of the invitation, then his parents and finally Jessica and Adam, after which he applied himself to his work till lunchtime. He was now up to date. In the afternoon he went into town in search of some light reading and came back to college by the scenic route in time for high tea.
At the appointed hour he picked up Lewis and they wandered into the city to find a quiet watering hole. They talked about the job situation. Lewis had spent the afternoon trawling through the Times Ed. There were plenty of posts available in the maintained sector, but he really wanted to teach in an independent school. He had been particularly annoyed at the picture of one fat, smarmy headmaster who claimed that NQTs were queuing up to teach at his tin pot little school for two thousand pounds a year less than the going rate. It was already difficult enough for those leaving university with loans to pay back. He had ignored an over the top ad for a chemist at that school and anyway he had found three posts he was interested in and would get down to making applications on the Sunday.
"You know, we used to play that place at rugby and cricket when I was at school."
"I’ll show you the picture and the article when we get back to college. What are you doing over the Easter vac, Ben?"
"Revision."
"You can't do that the whole time. You'll need a break."
"And there's the final dissertation to write."
"How about coming up to Glasgow and spending a few days with me?"
"Sounds good. I’ve never been to Glasgow before, but I don't want one of your Glasgow kisses, okay?" Lewis had his own flat in Scotland passed down when first his father and then within a year his mother died. He also had a small legacy which helped with the upkeep and kept him out of the grasping hands of the banks while he was at college. But that would not last for ever if he could get no job.
"We could go up in my car. That'll save you the railway journey. But I can't stop up there the whole time. I'll have to go back down to the west country." They drank up and wandered back to college, had another in the bar with their mates and then called it a day.
Sunday passed as Sunday does when there are no special arrangements, then Monday morning. At breakfast Ben had to summon up all his patience to remain there until the mail might have reasonably arrived and been sorted. He approached the Porters' Lodge and enquired. Nothing. He made his way upstairs, hands in pockets, head bowed and shoulders sloping. He buried his nose in a book on the philosophy of education until it was time to move off for his ten o'clock lecture. Once he was back in the mainstream his normal high spirits returned.
That afternoon he was due to visit a local comprehensive school to observe some maths lessons. He caught Lewis briefly at lunch and then went off across Cambridge with the other mathematicians. The teacher they observed was obviously gifted and provided his audience with one or two ideas. He was young and lively. Ben could not help but notice how the girls had packed themselves at the front of the class and were hanging on his every word, while the boys at the back of this year nine set represented some kind of attentive normality. Two bright eyed youths particularly caught his attention. In their faces was not only a spark of intelligence which made them stand out, but they were also separated by their neat and clean appearance in their school uniforms - shirts tucked in, ties neatly knotted - and in the end his attention wandered from observing this lesson in good practice, for he was completely taken by the lithesome and supple movements of their bodies to the extent he could not keep his eyes off them. When he realised he told himself he was after all a physical education student, but without any conviction. He tried to concentrate on observing the teaching methods, but his eyes kept straying back to the two adolescents he found so attractive to the point where one of them had noticed and he immediately communicated this to his neighbour. Ben looked at his watch. Ten minutes to go. In the background of his mind he heard the lesson being summed up, but his attention was still held by these two boys who were now looking across and, he was sure, smiling at him. He didn't even look away, but smiled back and winked.
"For the last five minutes," he heard the maths master say and Ben immediately returned to the real world, "perhaps our visitors would like to look at the class' work and talk to the pupils." With a little bit of a conscience that his private thoughts might have been unprofessional he was about to move to the front of the class where the girls were when to his devastation he saw the two attractive boys bringing their exercise books across to him. He gulped and talked to them about what they had been doing, but could not fail to notice that as they stood either side of him they had him trapped as it were. They were leaning against him in a most innocent and friendly manner. He was savouring the warmth and smell of their bodies and was sure from the way they were acting that they were enjoying his. The bell went for the end of the lesson. Ben was relieved. As the class streamed out of the room, the boys told him their names, hoped that he had spent a pleasant afternoon with them and said goodbye, all in a cultured accent one rarely associates with fourteen year olds en masse. On hearing their names he realised that they must be twins, though obviously not identical.
Ben felt hot and was glad to get into the corridor with his fellow students. They had a meeting with their tutor and the maths teacher which would occupy the time until their next period of observation. During it he was restored to his normal balance and extroversion and he asked in full knowledge why the girls sat at the front and the boys at the back of the class. They were unconvincingly informed that was simply the way the class arranged itself. The second lesson ran smoothly for Ben and he felt he had gained a lot from it. School was out and as the local population re-enacted the Bash Street Kids from the Beano the students gathered in the canteen for tea and a final summing up of the afternoon from their tutor and the teachers they had observed.
Eventually the party left and they made their ways back to their various colleges. As Ben passed the Porters' Lodge he noticed a large white envelope addressed to him in the mail rack. It had obviously been hand delivered for it bore neither postmark nor stamp. "Another personal invitation to a careers agency or financial seminar," he thought to himself and secured it to his clipboard as he went upstairs to see if Lewis was in his room. He was and he told him over a mug of coffee about the afternoon he had spent, especially the incident with the two boys. Lewis listened intently. As he got up to go across to his own room the letter fell out of the clipboard.
"Careful. You'd better read that before you lose it."
"I expect it's another load of junk mail," Ben replied as he casually stuck his thumb under the flap and ripped it open. To his astonishment it was a letterhead from the Mythe School. Open-mouthed he skimmed it until to his greater astonishment he read "… I therefore have pleasure in offering you the post of junior master in the mathematics department from the 1 September under the conditions of the enclosed contract and the proviso that you successfully complete your PGCE course. Please let me know at your earliest convenience, etc, etc. I look forward to working with you. Yours sincerely … Headmaster."
Ben could suppress his feelings no longer. "I’ve got the job," he shouted at the top of his voice and immediately took Lewis in a bearhug. He dropped his arms and pressed his hands so tightly against Lewis' buttocks that they could feel the throb of the other's body.
"We must celebrate this," said Lewis.
"That's exactly what we'll do this weekend," replied Ben and in their excitement they tripped and fell onto Lewis' bed still in an embrace. When they eventually released each other they just lay there for five minutes emotionally exhausted. Then Ben went back to his own room. He took out his mobile. He had a few calls to make. Finally he got round to changing into something more casual. As he went to empty his jacket pockets he pulled out a piece of paper from an exercise book. 'We were so surprised to see you today. We spotted you from that Lynx advert in Stud. Jack and Ted Batty' with an address and telephone number. Ben would send them each an autographed photo from his modelling portfolio.

XI

Over the next few days Ben and Lewis only saw each other at meals, passing on the landing, at communal lectures and for a quick cup of cocoa before bed. They were both clearing the decks for the following weekend. Ben finally admitted to himself that any reservations he had about accepting the post were a defence mechanism for the worst case scenario had he not been offered it. Admittedly he was surprised (that was just his natural modesty), but with hindsight the clues were there and all he had to do was to act sensibly. He wrote his letter of acceptance and delivered it personally. Now he could simply get on with his PGCE course and enjoy life.
Friday afternoon Ben got his work up to date and packed a bag. He knocked on Lewis' door and after a cup of tea together they picked up their kit and made their way across to meet Marc in his college carpark. Marc drove them out to Oddstones. It was still light as late winter was preparing to turn into spring. On arrival they climbed out of the motor, taking their kit with them, and were shown to their room. Not the loft this time, but the main guest room on the first floor, complete with a double bed. They had the floor to themselves as Marc was sleeping with Seb in his apartment while Elly was away. Seb had not yet got home from work.
So after freshening themselves up the three of them sat in the sitting room over a drink. It gave Ben and Lewis a chance to talk to Marc about their relationship, but Ben was still not ready to tell anyone else, particularly his parents. After all, Marc already knew and he had been in the same situation himself earlier in life. He ventured the opinion that they would be sympathetic and after meeting Lewis a fortnight ago they might not even be surprised. At that Seb arrived. He greeted them all with a hug and went to change into something a little more comfortable. Then they all put on their outdoor clothes and armed with torches walked along the country lanes to the village pub for dinner.
They all got on so well together that they were content just to sit and talk. Just before closing time they donned the outdoor gear once more and wandered, perhaps more noisily and maybe not quite so directly, back to Oddstones. Not ready for bed they got the Monopoly board out until the canny Scot had cleared the other three out of cash. Ben had a warm glow in his body as he stripped himself of all his clothes and climbed into bed. Lewis did likewise, switching off the lights except for his bedside lamp before snuggling down with Ben at his side.
It was nine o’clock by the time Ben climbed out of bed. That was late for him. He pulled on a pair of shorts and a tee shirt and went down to the kitchen where he found Marc alone just putting the finishing touches to the Daily Telegraph crossword. Both brothers had a ruddy glow on their cheeks, the radiance of full health.
"How did you sleep?" enquired Marc.
"Not a lot, but very well when I did," countered Ben with a knowing grin on his face. "How about you?"
"Fine. Tea or coffee?"

XII

The mood in the space-wagon on Monday morning was subdued. On the one hand it was an anticlimax after the excitement and activities of the weekend. They had all worked hard and played hard. On the other it had caught up with the three occupants of the car whose tiredness might otherwise be blamed on that Monday morning feeling. Fortunately Marc had no classes that day, but he felt that his new piece of research might not receive one hundred per cent attention and there was a faculty meeting late afternoon. Lewis' and Ben's bodies felt the aches and pains of their exertions and any ideas the PE student had that he was superfit could be summarily dismissed. Seb had disappeared earlier as he was working in London that week.
As the space-wagon crawled its way along one of the main commuter routes into Cambridge Ben lapsed into that halfway state between sleeping and waking. His mind went back to Saturday evening. After a physically strenuous day all four went back to Oddstones to relax before the evening's activities which had been organised by Seb. It was to be a fancy dress dinner and dance in his apartment, interesting for two reasons. First his apartment while quite adequate for him could not be described as other than small. Second no one had brought any fancy dress with them. However, that was the least of the problems for Seb had provided. Before he went off to start cooking he handed the participants a Lycra bodysock, each a different colour. Marc's was a sunshine yellow, Ben's a bright red, Lewis' a light green while Seb kept the turquoise one for himself. At a quarter to eight Ben and Lewis went up to change. They showered together to save water and time and dried each other off. Ben had difficulty at first getting into his bodysock and so he sat there watching Lewis slip expertly into his. He gave a sharp intake of breath when he saw how the garment clung to Lewis' buttocks and packet and quickly followed by putting on his.
They made their way to Seb's apartment. Marc was already there helping in the kitchen and rather than spoil the effect it was enhanced by the pinafores they were wearing over their Lycra apparel. Just before serving the pinafores came off and Ben's eyes grew large at the sight of the pair. Even his brother had taken his attention and he found life much more thrilling when the two joined him and Lewis for sherry on the three-seater sofa. The meal proceeded with the usual banter and conversation, but things hotted up again when they retired to the sofa for coffee. Coffee over Seb changed the music on the CD player and suggested they danced. Marc took Lewis in his arms while Seb embraced Ben. You can imagine the sensuous feeling of the Lycra clad bodies in an embrace, but before the excitement spilt over it was time to change partner until Ben was eventually dancing with his brother. He had always admired, even adored his elder brother, but in his twenty-three years this was the first time Marc had aroused any sexual feeling in him and while they tightly embraced he had to use all his self-control to prevent himself from kissing him for it would not have been the normal fraternal kiss on the brow or the cheek, but something more intense. Ben was brought back to reality as the space wagon jolted to a halt at the entrance to Marc's college carpark. He was pleased that Seb had allowed them to keep the fancy dress for a future occasion.
Lewis and even more so Ben had experienced a steep learning curve over the weekend to the extent that Ben felt he was bottom of the class. They had had long conversations with Marc and Seb together about the meaning of life. Ben had always valued his big brother's advice and experience and he felt that when the moment was right he could talk to his parents about his relationship with Lewis. Marc and Seb had also suggested, subject to Elly's approval, that he could spend the Easter vac at Oddstones. There would be no one at home during the day and little to distract him from his revision and dissertation. It was not long now until the end of term. A few days in Glasgow with Lewis to recover from term, a weekend with his parents in the west country, then back to Cambridgeshire for the duration.

XIII

Term ended. As promised Ben took Lewis to Scotland in his car. The flat was small, but sufficient for the two of them. Lewis had converted the other bedroom into a den, an office-study with an electric model railway and the wall covered with pictures and posters of gay icons, with a particularly large one of David Beckham while he still had his flowing blond mane.
"You didn't tell me you're a soccer fan, or that you had a model railway."
"Perhaps not a soccer fan. You would never get me to a Rangers match, and even less likely to Celtic," and they spent many an hour running trains between England and Scotland. At first they slept a great deal, but then Lewis was able to take him to see the sights of the city. Compared with Cambridge it was still winter. In the evenings they would go to the theatre or cinema, or perhaps choose a restaurant, then come back and chill out till the small hours of the morning and sleep in late.
Ben discovered what a meticulous person Lewis was. His flat was the opposite of a normal student's accommodation and its orderliness appealed to Ben. He also found out that Lewis was a dab hand at the kitchen stove, something he had little opportunity to discover at college.
Ben also had time to reflect on his conversations with Lewis. He readily acknowledged that family bereavement apart he had never had an unhappy moment in his life, but the last six months had given him added bliss, an extra dimension provided by Lewis' company and companionship. Privately he was dreading the end of the summer term, but that went unspoken.
Eventually that Friday morning came, Good Friday in fact, time for the journey south, but being a disciplined person by nature he accepted it stoically, said his farewells and climbed into his car. A74, M74, M6, M5. He would be home before it got dark. Home - that was an odd concept. Where was home? In the west country while he was boarding at Buckton and probably while he was at Durham. But during his year's teaching and two terms at Cambridge he had become increasingly more detached from his parents and their house and felt he was already putting roots down in Cambridgeshire. After all, most of the family were there. Now he had a job there and he could see his parents eventually selling up and coming to live over on the eastern side of the country near him, his brother and sister.
He had come to the inevitable decision that he had to tell his parents about his sexual orientation. For most of the journey south he pondered how. He thought back to his time at home when the family usually took a walking holiday over the Easter weekend. Now the fledgelings had all flown the nest and his parents felt they were too old for such exertions. He thought back to one Easter holiday before the time he had gone to board at Buckton College. Marc was home on holiday, but not in his usual happy mood. It was about the time he (Ben) met Seb for the first time. At the time Seb had seemed no more than just one of Marc's friends, someone who had come on holiday with them. He had not even found it strange that there was a difference in their ages. Seb had become a friend of the family, was welcomed by them. He seemed to be a member of the family until Jessica married Seb's brother Adam and he officially became one. He was very fond of Seb. Only later as he started to adolesce did he learn that Marc and Seb were in love with one another. The fact was accepted and no great fuss had been made. It had never struck him that it was unconventional, nor until he had gone to Buckton himself that it was a sexual relationship, but with years to get used to it it didn't worry him either. It was just part of his upbringing. Now the mantle of Elijah had fallen on Elisha.
His parents were pleased to see him. His mother commented how well he looked. On the Saturday evening his mother had some of her lady friends round for bridge. It was an ideal opportunity for father and son to go out for a drink. At first his father did most of the talking. He was keen to know about Ben's new job, where he would live. That was something he had given little thought to over the excitement of the past few weeks. Finally he felt he could direct the conversation.
"Dad, do you remember that Easter we went walking in the Peak District for the weekend, the one when Marc was going through a miserable time? And you know Jessica and I didn't really know what it was about, but we found out as we grew up?" His father nodded in agreement. Ben drew a deep breath. "Well, I think I'm the same as Marc. I'm gay, homosexual." He took a large sip of his beer and waited for his father's reaction. His father said nothing at first. He didn't even look shocked, not even surprised. Finally he spoke.
"And does that make you feel unhappy or discontent with yourself?"
"No, not at all. In fact quite the opposite, perhaps relieved even."
"I’ll say the same to you as I said when Marc told me he was gay. Your mother and I are proud of all our children. We love you and we're proud of what you've achieved so far in life. We produced you and we made you what you are and we love you the way you are. I don't want you worrying about us. We just want your happiness and all the time you're happy and it's not at someone else's expense we'll support you." Ben heaved a sigh of relief. "You’ll need something stronger than that to drink. Whisky or G & T?"
"A malt whisky please, Dad."
While his father was at the bar Ben could breathe again. He had shed a great weight. His father returned with two doubles. Fortunately they had walked to the pub.
"Here's to you, son, and to your future happiness." He went on to tell his father about Lewis and how he had spent the weekend with him and Marc at Oddstones and about spending a few days with him in Glasgow.
"We’re really like Marc and Seb were."
"Do you want to tell your mother or do you want me to do it?"
"Can we do it together?"
"Well, it’s ten o'clock. The bridge party will be breaking up. We'll make our way home."
The bridge party was indeed breaking up as they went through the front door. When the ladies had finally gone Ben's father brought a glass of sherry and two more whiskies into the living room. Together father and son broke the news to mother. She had been there before, she who is unshockable. She simply raised her glass and said "Then we have something to celebrate." When the toasting had died down she said "I liked Lewis immediately I met him. He’s a good-looking lad, too." So Ben went to bed that night with a light heart, but woke Easter morning with the heavy head of a hangover. However, the three made it to church and Ben had recovered sufficiently to enjoy one of his mother's Sunday roasts afterwards.
After an early lunch on Tuesday Ben embarked on his return to Cambridgeshire and in the evening safely installed himself with his books, notes and laptop in Oddstones for the rest of the vacation.

XIV

Ben now felt at peace with himself and could consequently concentrate on his dissertation and revision. He had chosen as his theme the importance of physical education in balancing the academic curriculum and countering the couch potato society. During a break on his journey back to Cambridgeshire he had telephoned Lewis to say he had told his parents about their relationship, how reasonably they had reacted and how they looked forward to meeting him again. That evening he made a similar announcement over dinner to Marc, Elly and Seb who heartily congratulated him on the boldness of his decision, but he made it clear that for professional reasons he did not want to come out publicly, well not yet anyway. Despite having the law on his side he felt that independent schools could still react very insensitively, unafraid of any subsequent industrial tribunal, while the maintained sector had to toe the line.
Ben worked hard until the day before the University term began. He interspersed his revision with daily runs, visits to the college gym and of course calls to Lewis whom he encouraged to work hard at his revision. On that Monday he moved his kit back into his college room early in the morning, brought his car back to Oddstones, caught the bus back into Cambridge and waited for the arrival of his loved one. He knew the train journey from Glasgow was less than direct, but using the Internet he deduced Lewis' ETA and walked along to the railway station in the hope of being able to greet him as he alighted from the train.
At last the train drew into the station and as he he looked up and down the platform he eventually spotted Lewis. He ran up to him and without further ado Lewis dropped his luggage and they flung their arms round each other in a hug. Ben picked up one of his bags and they walked towards the exit. As they did they heard two voices behind them hailing them with a cheery hallo.
"Do you remember us?" said one.
"How could I forget," said Ben with a smile and a twinkle in his eye. "You're the twins I met when I visited your school a few weeks ago. Jack and Ted, isn’t it?"
"That’s right," said Ted.
"Thanks for those photos you sent us." said Jack.
"Well, you were pretty sharp spotting who I was. You're the only people who have ever done that." "Introduce me to your fans," said Lewis, obviously interested. Ben reminded him of the story of his teaching observation at the local comprehensive he had visited and the penny immediately dropped.
"We’ve left that school," said Jack and Ted in unison. "We're going to the Mythe School now." Two jaws dropped.
"Well, we might see you then," replied Ben, quickly regaining his composure. "We start teaching there again in a week's time." At this they parted company as the two youngsters went off to catch a bus.
"That’s something to look forward to," said Lewis. "Should make third form games interesting. You’ve certainly got a gift for spotting talent." Ben blushed.
"It wasn't like that at all," but realising he was having the mickey taken out of him he knew any further explanation would be useless.
Back at college Lewis unpacked, informal dinner and then out for a drink to celebrate being together again.
"I haven't told you the good news yet, have I?" said Ben. "When I told Marc and Elly about us, they were so pleased, but the important thing was that they said that whenever we needed a break we could come and spend the weekend at Oddstones. You're to consider yourself one of the family which means as long as we're content to entertain ourselves we can go there whenever we want, even if they're doing other things. They're only a telephone call away."
They made their way back to college. Lewis had brought another bottle of one of his rare malts back from Scotland which had to be sampled that evening. Even without the alcohol they had the ardent desire to spend the night together, but realised that as the college was packed with those freshly returned for the new term they would have to bide their time. After an intimate hug Ben returned to his room, got ready for bed and relieved his yearning in the time honoured way.
Next day there was a special programme of lectures and seminars. The dissertations were handed in. Then two and a half days of examinations, a long weekend and TP on the following Monday. Ben and Lewis took full advantage of his brother's and sister-in-law’s invitation.
It was interesting now that Lewis' and Ben's relationship was officially confirmed among the family. Seb had always been polite, welcoming and outgoing towards them, but now he started to take a real interest in the couple and would often take them off to his apartment for a drink and a chat. He played the rôle of big brother and father figure in one, and in a most delightful way, putting them at ease. Oddstones was to become their home from home.

XV

Ben and Lewis walked off to the Mythe School together on the Monday morning. As a future member of staff Ben found a different attitude towards him from the colleagues. The pupils did not know. His maths commitment was doubled. He now had two forms which in all probability he would not teach when he started officially in September. He was also encouraged to observe sixth form classes. Lewis again disappeared off to the labs for his chemistry and would join Ben for third form games two afternoons a week.
The school was large enough to provide a choice. The cricketers were creamed off and they practised for inter-school matches, while over the term the rest followed a varied programme of team sports such as cricket and softball, or individual ones such as tennis, athletics or swimming. And this is where Ben and Lewis worked together under the supervision of the games staff. As a PE man officially, at least for the time being, Ben had responsibility for organising the various activities.
Lewis, of course, still had not gained a post and was tired of reading about the shortage of science teachers. He had made many applications, but at present was not even getting interviews. Ben jollied him along, quite easy from his position of strength, and would help him trawl through the Times Ed.
After their combined games afternoons the two lads would remain behind and thrash a ball about the tennis court. Ben could easily fit his runs into the teaching day, but Lewis felt he was neglecting his fitness. One advantage of this term's TP would be that they at least had the school half term holiday and they had plans for it.
The first week had passed quickly and on Friday evening after a game of tennis the two wandered back to college depressed at the idea of marking and lesson preparation for the following week plus a visit from their tutors. However, on arriving back there was a little light relief, for the workers returning from the chalkface were soon directed to the college notice board. The results of the theory exams were posted and both Lewis and Ben had passed. Whatever the workload this called for a celebratory drink after dinner. Ben was relieved since he only had to pass this term's TP and he had a PGCE and a job. Lewis had something else to add to his CV. Not only that, but he also had a letter inviting him to interview at the school where Ben had first met the Batty twins while on observation. He encouraged his friend by saying how impressed he had been with the atmosphere.
In the college bar there was the usual Friday night crowd, but of course not many of them were education students, many of whom had moved out to their boarding schools again and would not hear their results until the following day, or even Monday. Lewis got in the first round and the lads joined their friends, but it became clear that they really wanted to be on their own. So they drank up and went out to town to find a quiet pub. Some hope on a Friday evening, but they did manage it in the backstreets of Cambridge. Lewis possessed an uncanny ability of seeking out eating places and watering holes suitable for the particular mood or occasion. As they walked through the streets Ben slipped his arm round Lewis' waist and immediately experienced a tightening in his trousers which just added to his overall feeling of frustration. Despite the terms of the open invitation he did not feel he could at such short notice telephone his brother and sister-in-law and stretch their hospitality, especially as it was less than a week since their last stay there. In any case the work for school had piled up for both of them and it had to be a working weekend. Installed in a dark and quiet corner of the pub Ben disclosed his feelings to Lewis, quite unnecessarily as Lewis was not only in the same state, but had also correctly judged his friend's mood.
They drank slowly and quietly, often staring longingly into one another's eyes. It was all they could do to prevent themselves from behaving in an unacceptable way in public as their passions became roused. Eventually as last orders were called they realised how time had melted away and they made the decision to wend their way back to college. Ben invited Lewis to his room for a nightcap of cocoa and biscuits. Lewis went to his own room and divested himself of his outdoor clothes, quickly returning with his new bottle of malt whisky. As Ben was mixing the hot drinks Lewis came up behind him and took him in a hug. Any resistance he might have had disappeared in a trice and still in a hug he led him to his bed and they tumbled onto it.
When Ben woke he was freezing for his clothes were in a pile on the floor mingled with Lewis'. It was one o'clock in the morning. He slipped on his dressing gown, finished making the cocoa and took a cup to Lewis. He too felt cold and slipped his clothes back on. They slowly drank their cocoa, feeling like death warmed up, before Lewis finally stood up, kissed his lover on the cheek, picked up his untouched bottle of whisky and disappeared back to his own room with a whispered "Good Night".

XVI

The lads' Saturday squash game in winter had given way to tennis in summer. After today's game they parted company to do marking and preparation. From then on the weekend was unremarkable which is more than could be said for the following week. It appeared to start with Tuesday games, or at least that was when our two friends first noticed what was happening. It was one of those warm, still Spring afternoons that lull you into the illusion that Summer is beginning. Tuesday and Thursday games were the occasions when the four people involved came together. This particular day Ben and Lewis were organising a softball match and who should be in their group, but the Batty twins. So far, so good. Apart from the customary cheery greeting from each to each of the games staff there was at first nothing to pick them out of the crowd. As newboys they had integrated well with their classmates. They even already appeared to be well-liked. Ben divided the class into two teams with Jack on one side and Ted on the other, trying to make the sides equal according to their training and certainly not allowing the captains to pick in case the last two chosen should suffer the pangs of inferiority. From what followed it also seemed that he had divided the twins correctly with Ted in Lewis' team while Jack was in his. Both boys did what they could to be helpful in setting up the game, or to put another way to attract the attention of their respective team coach to the extent that Ben even remarked upon it to Lewis.
"So you noticed as well. It's not an unknown situation. I'll tell you about it later." Lewis went off to organise his team while Ben sorted out his. Then it happened, as if rehearsed and on cue. Just before the game was about to begin Jack and Ted removed their tracksuits, not just that, but by asking questions about the game they made sure they had the attention of their teachers. Jack was dressed in a white singlet and very short white shorts leaving very little to the imagination, while Ted wore a Linford Christie type Lycra running-suit which left absolutely nothing to the imagination, and to say the least both were very well developed boys. However, the remarkableness did not stop there for their gear was as near as possible to what Ben had been modelling in the pictures which he had sent them from his portfolio the previous term. No problem for Lewis. He just went on and answered the questions, but it was Ben who forgot himself, dropping his jaw and with his eyes popping out on stalks. Lewis helped his friend and colleague out by causing a distraction and anyway the cheers, clapping and wolf-whistles from the rest of the class saved the situation. Obviously Ted had done it for a dare.
Lewis clapped his hands and called everyone in for the toss-up and final instructions, but Jack at least, if not Ted as well, knew they had attained their first goal. Fortunately the other boys seemed oblivious.
The rest of the session went as planned. However, when the group was dismissed who should stay behind but Jack and Ted who wanted to help put the equipment away, or rather they wanted the undivided attention of their teachers.
"Don’t forget your tracksuits," said Ben who after a whole double lesson had eventually got used to their appearance.
"Do you like the sportsgear, sir?" piped up Jack.
"It was a birthday present," Ted joined in.
"I think I’ve seen something like that before," said Ben.
"Yes. You were wearing it in those photos you sent us when we were still at the comp."
"I know. That's why I looked so surprised," said Ben lying through his teeth, and the boys knew it. Lewis just looked away so they couldn't see the grin on his face as he almost choked suppressing his laughter.
"They say imitation is the sincerest form of flattery," he managed to splutter out. Jack and Ted were as good as their word in clearing away and with a typically cheery "See you Thursday, sirs" went off to get changed.
With a feeling of relief once they had gone Ben challenged Lewis to a jog round the playing fields which they interspersed with sprints and exercises. Since they had been back at the Mythe Ben had taken Lewis' complaint of losing his fitness seriously and they kept each other up to scratch physically. They went off to shower and change, collected their books from the Common Room and made their way back to college.
Walking along the main road Ben said "What were you going to explain later?" It was the first reference to the afternoon's amazing events.
"What? About those two lads?"
"Mmm."
"Typical adolescent crushes. We used to do that sort of thing at school if we fancied a young master, especially if we thought he was gay as well. They've obviously got us sussed and I would say they were sympathetic rather than anti."
"So what do we do about it?"
"Act professionally. Don’t react to their behaviour, but remain deadpan. Don’t encourage it, but on the other hand don't avoid them or ignore them because that could lead to all sorts of trouble."
"It's all right for you to say that, but I've got a job here and I want to keep it." Ben was obviously troubled inside, particularly by the fact that he had found them both attractive. Despite his love for Lewis he still had not sorted himself out fully. There were depths in his make-up that even he had not as yet fathomed.
"Well, one thing is to make sure as far as possible that they remain with the group. Try and forestall them from staying behind alone and if they do, make sure there are other boys there with us." Meanwhile they had arrived back at college and they went for a cup of tea in Lewis' room.
That was fine on Thursday. The twins had been detailed off to play tennis while Ben and Lewis ran two five-a-side soccer games. By the time the following Tuesday session came round they had forgotten about the twins until Ben came to take their swimming session. Firstly he could not help but notice them because of their cheery greeting followed by an enquiry as to where Lewis was. But once they had made themselves stand out from the crowd Ben could not keep his eyes off them in their snug fitting swimming costumes, for while a good half of the class wore boxer type shorts Jack and Ted were among the minority attired in scrungies and theirs clung to and accentuated every nook and cranny of their lower anatomy. To make matters worse the pair stretched and posed whenever waiting on the side of the pool and Ben could not look away when Jack in particular clasped his hands behind his head, bent backwards and turned and smiled at him. After that he kept the boys in the water as much as possible until the changeover in activities halfway through the session in the hope that the effect of the cold water on their anatomies would give them less incentive to tart so outrageously, but it seemed to have the opposite effect. He was grateful no other member of staff was there to witness what could have been embarrassing for him. On the other hand he wasn't to know that they would not have behaved so outrageously had their regular member of staff been there.
After dismissing their classes Ben and Lewis met and as they were not on changing duty that afternoon they went for their run round the fields. The warm, late Spring weather was continuing and they had worked up a profuse sweat by the time they returned to the staff changing room in the pavilion. Lewis checked that everyone had gone before they stripped off and went for a shower, but imagine their surprise when walking into the shower for who should they find still there? None other than Jack and Ted. At first the two pairs stopped in their tracks. Ben, as naïve as ever, just stared open-mouthed. The twins just stared. A smile, or was it a grin, broke out over their faces as they made no effort to look away. Ben could not take his eyes off Jack. Yet neither could Jack tear his away from Ben. It was as if time stood still and when they eventually did look one another in the face they each saw on the other a wide-eyed picture of wonderment and admiration. Ben had never noticed such perfection of form in the beauty of a human being, a beauty that could not be surpassed by Lewis or Seb or even his brother. Jack was obviously in awe of how well developed Ben was, although neither twin could exactly be described as a eunuch, and meanwhile time continued to stand still.
Again it was Lewis who saved the situation saying "Shouldn’t you have been gone ages ago?"
"Is it that late, sir?" remarked Jack.
"Sorry, we didn’t realise. I haven’t got my watch on," said Ted, at which they slowly and deliberately in mock deference minced past and out of the showers with satisfied smiles on their faces and a cheery "Sorry, sirs.", "We won’t do it again, sirs.", "Bye, sirs, see you tomorrow.", but in a manner for which they could not be reproached and just in time before Ben betrayed his genuine interest.
"How do you manage, Lewis?" Ben exhaled a long sigh of relief.
"Experience," came the reply.
They showered and changed, collected their books from the Common Room and made their way back to college. When they had arrived back at college they went for a cup of tea in Ben's room.
Thursday Ben made sure that he organised the session so that he and Lewis would be nowhere near the twins, but afterwards felt that he had cut off his own nose to spite his face for he missed them, something which Lewis coincidentally remarked on as they made their way back to college.
On the Friday school broke up for half term. They would return after ten days for the last two weeks of TP and their final assessment. Also Lewis had at last gained a job interview at the comprehensive after half term. However, first they were going on holiday and on the recommendation of Ben's brother and brother-in-law where were they heading for? Nowhere else but Mykonos.

XVII

Ben and Lewis spent the Friday night at Oddstones from where Marc took them to the airport early Saturday morning. Once on the aeroplane they could finally relax and look forward to a week of sun, swimming, other sporting activities and most importantly each other's company. They arrived at their hotel in Mykonos Town late in the afternoon. They vowed to do very little that evening. So after dinner they returned to their hotel room, chilled out for an hour and went to bed. They woke to bright sunshine, got up, showered and appeared for breakfast by the pool dressed in tee shirt and shorts.
The week passed quickly for Ben and Lewis. They didn't mind that there was little sight-seeing to be done on the island. They were happy to bathe and sunbathe, to play the various sports on offer. After a light lunch they would return to their air conditioned room at the hotel for a siesta during the heat of the day when they could lie in bed together and enjoy each other. Late afternoon they would swim in the sea or in the hotel pool and in evening eat either in the hotel or in one of the many bars where they met fellow British tourists with the same interests and with whom they sat and talked over a drink. It would be gone midnight before they finally climbed into bed and fell asleep in each other's arms.
Saturday they had to fly back to England and to make them feel the benefit of their week's holiday the weather was at its most dismal with rain on landing at Stanstead. Their first job was to ring Marc which meant that they had at best an hour to kill until he arrived. Rather than look back over the week they sat in one of the cafés and looked forward. Two more weeks of TP, then the long summer holidays. Ben had not given a thought to where he was going to live, probably because if push came to shove he could stay at Oddstones. Lewis still had no job, but he did have an interview. One more thought occupied Ben - the twins, especially Jack.
On the Monday Ben walked to the Mythe School alone. For Lewis this was interview day and Ben had left him at college after wishing him the best of luck and giving him some unneeded advice on his attire. At school there was a large stiff brown envelope awaiting him with a 'Do not bend' label stuck to the front. It had come through the post, typed address label and Cambridge postmark on the franked label. It was time for assembly. So he carefully put the envelope into his briefcase where it remained temporarily forgotten for the rest of the day. Ben had more important things on his mind. His tutor was coming to observe third year games on the Tuesday afternoon and he wanted to make sure he was well prepared. As the programme was his he made sure that the Batty twins would not be in his group, but delegated them to Lewis. He was going to spend the whole afternoon with the same boys on various athletic skills: sprint starts, baton changeovers for track events and long jump and triple jump for field. He cleared the programme with his mentor, made sure the facilities were available and retired to the 'quiet room' to write out his lesson plan. Fourth form maths and then the seniors for games in the afternoon. After the end of school he kept up his personal fitness with a run and a medley of exercises, then made his way back to college. He had been so busy all day that it was not until the walk home that he gave a thought to Lewis and how he had got on. He went straight up to his room and was surprised to find he hadn't returned yet. He spent the next hour luxuriating in the bath. Finally he got out, dried himself and dressed down in grandad vest and his faded 501s to face the rest of the day. Like his brother he could wear Levi's as if they had been personally tailored for him with them fitting snugly and emphasising his manly figure without ever appearing tight.
Once he had dried his hair he made his way across the landing to be met halfway by Lewis. He had no need to ask him how he had got on. His face told all. Ben took him in a hug and swung him round like a young child.
"But did you accept it?"
"I asked for a night to think about it. It seemed too good to be true and I wanted to search out the disadvantages. Anyway, it's chemistry or combined science throughout the school with a strong sixth form. A games commitment if I want it. A third form tutor group and no other responsibilities in my probationary year. I have until midday tomorrow to get in touch. How did your day go?"
"I’ve been planning for my final assessment tomorrow afternoon. Can we discuss it after supper? And then a small celebration is in order. The drinks are on me."
As on most evenings it was informal dinner. Afterwards the pair went back to Ben's room to talk about lesson plans. He took his folder out of his briefcase and with it came the brown envelope.
"Oh, I’d forgotten that. It was waiting for me at school." He took his paper knife, carefully slit it open and slid out a letter and some photographs. The letter was addressed to both him and Lewis and was from the Batty twins. Ben could hardly believe his eyes as he read the letter out. The photos were holiday snaps from the twins' Easter break. They had been offered as a thank you for the ones Ben had sent them at the end of last term. There were two separate folders clearly marked with Lewis' and Ben's names. Ben opened his. Inside he found two large colour photographs. The top one was of both twins in most revealing swimming costumes on the beach somewhere. Lewis had the same. The second one was of them individually - a picture of Ted in Lewis' folder and a highly provocative one of Jack in Ben's. Ben felt his blood pump faster round his body and when he could finally take his eyes off the subject and look at the background he recognised straightaway where the photos had been taken. The twins had spent their Easter holiday in Mykonos.
It was five minutes before Lewis could tear his friend away from the contents of the envelope. He could only take his eyes off the photos when he was reading and rereading the letter which incidentally ended with 'Your affectionate admirers'. Even Lewis' genuine interest faded into indifference when set besides Ben's. Finally Lewis took them gently out of his hand and put them in Ben's desk drawer. Woken from his dream at last Ben spoke.
"Lewis, before we go out we ought to make a decision about the weekend. I thought it might be a nice idea if we went to Oddstones."
"What about work?"
"Well, we can probably do that just as well there as here. Probably better as I'll be the only distraction and I promise to behave myself. Honest."
"Oh, that’s a pity. Anyway, it's just that I’ll be building up to my final assessment on the Tuesday after."
"Oh, you've got the date?"
"Yes, there was a note waiting for me when I came back from the interview." At that Lewis went back to his room to get ready and Ben hauled out his mobile to phone Oddstones. Marc answered.
"Yes, of course you can. No worries." Marc had obviously been watching too much Home and Away. "You know Elly and I are going down to see Mum and Dad this weekend, don't you? And Seb's in and out. So you’ll have the place to yourselves. Don’t worry. We’ll do the Sainsbury's run and fill up the fridge and the larder before we go."
"No need," said Ben unable to hide his mendacity.
"So I’ll pick you up Friday afternoon and get you back in time for school Monday morning. Is that all right?"
"Couldn't have planned it better myself. We're just off out to celebrate. Lewis has got a job offer and as I've spent all day preparing for my final assessment tomorrow, I need a break, even if it's only for lemonade and lime."
"Good luck for tomorrow."
"Thanks. Love to Elly and Seb. Bye." And at that point Lewis came back into the room suitably dressed down for a warm summer's evening. "We’re on for the weekend," and with that they left for one of Cambridge's low spots.
As good as his word Ben bought all the drinks that night, all two rounds. Not that Lewis lived up to the reputation of a Scotsman. In fact he had a very generous nature. Also you had to listen to him very carefully to discover that he was Scottish at all, although Ben did notice on his visit to Glasgow he soon lapsed into the accent when he was talking to the natives. Perhaps that was self-preservation.
Settled into a quiet corner with a drink and sitting beside each other Ben said to Lewis "So what about this job, then?" He talked very enthusiastically about it, how he liked the school and the pupils he had seen, how concerned they were to help NQTs through their probationary year. He'd liked the staff and the atmosphere in the staff room. "So what’s holding you back?"
"It’s you, really." Ben looked genuinely shocked and Lewis realised it. "“Or rather us." The look on Ben's face eased.
"What do you mean?" Lewis was searching for the right words.
"We talk a lot, don't we? But we never really talk about us."
"We’ve never needed to. We just came together by chance, got on together by chance and discovered we shared the same interests by chance. I suppose we've just taken everything for granted. We have never needed to talk about us."
"I won't ask the question I want to ask, not yet anyway, and I think I know the answer, but I'll tell you what's on my mind." Ben sat back and took occasional sips of his lemonade and lime as Lewis spoke. "As I said, we came together by chance for this PGCE year and I have always assumed that at the end of it we would for good or ill go our separate ways, but…" He paused. "…you’ve got a job in Cambridge and I've been offered a job in Cambridge. I like the job and I'm also desperate to take it. It's late in the school year." He stalled. "I've grown very fond of you, Ben. We've had a lot of fun together, but I have never assumed that I have any claim on your life apart from the natural demands of friendship. My feelings, however, have gone beyond friendship and I have fallen in love with you."
Lewis waited for the shock to appear on Ben's face, but it didn't come. The more extrovert and therefore less introspective of the two, Ben, had never questioned their relationship. He had fully accepted it without concerning himself with the implications. After a short pause he simply turned towards Lewis, took hold of his hand, kissed him on the cheek and then whispered in his ear "I've known that for ages and I've fallen in love with you too. Only I've never got round to telling you, which now makes me feel awful." Lewis returned the kiss. Ben stood up and got the second round in.
After toasting their love for one another they sat back. Rationality had returned. They sat back and Ben began the conversation again. "I had to sort myself out and I could only start to when I knew I had a job and where it was. I haven't done much, but get tomorrow over I've got just under three months and no excuse. You've probably heard one of us say that Marc bought Oddstones out of a legacy. The legacy was from our grandparents, mother's parents, and was split equally between Marc, Jessica and me. Jessica's now got her home with Adam. I was under eighteen at the time and my share was invested, and invested very well. I can afford to buy a house and have some change left over. If you would like to, you could move in with me. You could help me choose the house." Lewis' face had become radiant.
"That's more than I ever dared think and if I sell my flat I can pay my share."
"We'll worry about that later. The important thing is - will you accept the job?"
"You’ve taken all my reservations away. Of course I will. Now look, my first lesson's at ten tomorrow. Can you tell them I'll be in late, but in time to teach, as I've got to go back to the school? Then I can deliver my acceptance in person."
They drank up and made their way back to college. It was still light as the sun was dipping below the horizon and the day had lost little of its warmth. On the tortuous way back they passed through a narrow alley. As no one was in sight Lewis took Ben in a tight embrace, pressed him against the wall and gave him such a passionate kiss that it was to leave them both with a feeling of extreme frustration that night.

XVIII

On the next day Ben's final teaching assessment went very well, although not without one hitch. Despite his best laid plans who should turn up in his group but the terrible twins. They had come to an arrangement with two other boys and sent them off to Lewis' group. They couldn't have known in advance how important this lesson was for Ben, not until they recognised his college tutor from previous sessions. He could not send them away and in the end it paid off to have them there. Considering that they had only been at the Mythe for just over half a term, and among people who had known each other for nearly three years they had been extremely well accepted. Though typical of the ethos of the school it was still quite a social achievement. Perhaps with their experience of peer group pressure from the comprehensive they knew how to run a class and although they had never used that ability maliciously they immediately noticed a place for it now. Not that Ben had ever had any difficulties with his classes, but he could tell the right atmosphere had been set among the pupils. They were attentive and they tried their hardest. Without going into any more detail the session could not have worked out better. Afterwards there was a discussion between him, his tutor and his school mentor at the end of which he was sent away with an invitation to sherry with his tutor before dinner that evening. Ben could only wonder at the purpose of that. It was informal dinner anyway.
By the time he got back to the changing room Lewis was just coming out of the shower after his sprints and jogs round the school playing fields. Ben faithfully reported what had happened including the way the Batty twins had swapped groups. Had they known something?
"Do you think they heard us talking in the changing room?" enquired Lewis.
"Then they must have reacted very quickly," answered Ben.
"They can’t have picked anything up from before half term, or could they?" Ben went round to check the pavilion before he took his shower and changed. They collected their books from the Common Room and made their way back to college. When they had arrived back at college they went for a cup of tea in Lewis' room.
P E students were expected to wear a blazer when they were at school and not in sports kit and this is what Ben wore when he crossed the court to go to his tutor's rooms. After the formalities and the sherry had been poured he sat back in a deep armchair anxiously awaiting to hear the reason for this summons.
"Ben, it will take a little time before you hear this through the official channels, but I wanted to tell you personally how pleased your practice school is with you and with what you’ve done there. It certainly makes it easier for us to place another student with them next year. They're looking forward to your starting in September. Have you found somewhere to live yet?" Ben outlined his plans, leaving out one important detail. "You’ve been an interesting student to teach. We rarely have anyone who is not PE trained and so there was a challenge for us, as well. You'll be pleased to know that we shall be awarding you a straight alpha for this term's teaching practice which with the previous TP's alpha minus and your meritable theory exams and dissertation means that you will receive your certificate and although there is no official class or honour you have performed most creditably. Congratulations and I look forward to seeing you on my future visits to the Mythe. Still, the enemy has caught up with us and it's time to stroll across to Hall. Good luck in your career and I hope you will enjoy teaching." Ben rose from his chair flushed with pride and enthusiastically thanked his tutor for all his help.
He could not wait to tell Lewis who was as happy as he was on hearing the news. Later in the week at school the Headmaster caught up with him and took him into this study. After congratulating him on gaining his PGCE he confirmed Ben's post from September and asked him to come in for a day during school exams to prepare himself for the term ahead.
On Friday afternoon Marc picked up Ben and Lewis and took them off to Oddstones. As they went in Seb walked out with a suitcase which he put in the boot of his car. All four joined Elly for a cup of tea. After greeting them warmly she said how pleased she was that the house would not be empty over the weekend. The 'boys' offered to wash up while she and Marc got ready for their weekend journey down to the west country. Finally with Seb already gone Ben and Lewis waved them goodbye, wishing them a safe journey and sending their love to the parents. Finally they could relax and plan their weekend of work for Lewis, marking and lesson prep for Ben with a little relaxation permitted inbetween.
On Saturday morning they slept in. After a late breakfast they spent their time on keeping fit with a run round the neighbourhood. They were getting to know the area by now and had found a route of public footpaths that would take them round the village and bring them to the main road on the Cambridge side. Just as they were running along the lane which opened out onto the main road they had to stop while Lewis bent down to do up his shoe lace. As Ben wandered around his eye happened upon a 'For Sale' notice and mindful of an earlier conversation he called across.
"Hey, Lewis, come and have a look at this." A drive led from the lane to a plot of land largely screened from any traffic by high hedges, but once they looked inside they saw two separate houses set back quite a way from the road and obviously with some land attached to each. Strangely both were for sale, but even odder was the fact that though they obviously belonged together, they were built in two entirely different styles. Both brick built, the larger one was a conventional detached house with obviously at least four bedrooms and a double garage. They could see no more from the front. However, it was the other one which intrigued Ben. The ground area was smaller, but unusually it was a cottage built in an L-shape with two wings. The garage was separate from the house. The other thing that struck him was that although architecturally different the two houses belonged together for there was little sign of their being fenced off. "What do you think of these, Lewis?" He pointed out what he had noticed. "I’m quite taken with the L-shaped one. You don’t see many of those." Lewis' mind was not really tuned to houses at that moment, but after a little consideration he agreed. Ben made a mental note of the estate agent's name. As he was based in Cambridge he could easily pop in on Monday.
They continued their run through the village and back to Oddstones. After a shower they decided out of sheer caprice to put on their bodysocks as these not only showed their bodies off to great advantage and the delight of the other, but the material enhanced any physical contact they had. Lewis disappeared up to the bedroom while Ben stayed in the sitting room to get on with their various tasks for school. Ben had volunteered to do the cooking to allow Lewis time for his work. They would snack at lunchtime and eat properly in the evening. Up to date with his tasks Ben took the newspaper into the garden and promptly dozed off on the sun lounger. In the afternoon Lewis joined him there and they simply relaxed. Once dinner was over and cleared away they slumped down in front of the television. At least Channel Four could be relied on for something reasonably stimulating on a Saturday evening.
For the meal they permitted themselves a bottle of wine from which they had just drained the last drop. It was already dark when suddenly over the sound of the television they heard a noise outside. They put their trainers back on. Ben grabbed a baseball bat left with the umbrellas by the backdoor and they both crept out. As they did the security lights came on. There was the sound of a motor and a van, its backdoors still open, screeched and with a skid start sped down the drive. The driver, however, left his unfortunate accomplice behind. He dropped the bag he was carrying and tried to leg it. With two against him he had nowhere to go and with two fit young men, one a qualified (almost) P E student, he would have stood very little chance had he tried to escape. Held in an arm lock by the other two the unfortunate was dragged indoors and forced to the floor by the telephone. Lewis dialled 999. Ben removed his balaclava and saw the frightened face of a youth much their own age, but with a variety of pustules and body piercing. Once Lewis was free, Ben said he had an idea. In the scullery he had seen some large plastic ties, the type used in the garden to tie trees to stakes. Once fastened they could only be cut off. With Lewis' help he slipped one round the culprit's ankles. Then he was roughly turned round and his wrists were similarly bound at the back. Now it was just a question of waiting which they did in complete silence to unnerve the burglar still further. Lewis then went and fetched two pairs of tracksuit bottoms which our heroes slipped on, feeling that a bodysock might not be the most appropriate attire to meet the police in. Within twenty minutes they could see the bluelight flashing outside. They quickly cut off the cable ties, put the baseball bat back in the bin with the umbrellas and let the police in through the backdoor. Once the intruder was in their custody Lewis went and picked up the bag he had dropped outside. The tools and the stolen property were enough to make his intent clear. The police made the arrest, took some details, were confident that they knew who his accomplice was and said he would receive a visit before the night was out. The detainee was taken away in handcuffs and quiet descended again on Oddstones. Fortunately because of the quick action by Ben and Lewis nothing had actually gone missing - the contents of the bag had been taken away as evidence - and the damage was limited. Incidentally some months later they did hear that the arrest of that villain, and later that night of his mate, resulted in a custodial sentence and a significant reduction of break-ins in the Cambridge area.
The following day went smoothly. Fitness and work in the morning. Sunday lunch at the village inn and a relaxing afternoon spent on the sun lounger together. By eight o'clock Marc, Elly and Seb had returned. Over a cup of tea Ben and Lewis described the adventures of the previous evening. Elly said how pleased she was someone had been there while they were away, or the burglary might have been much more serious. When they had finished Marc and Elly announced that they had some news of their own, which had been the purpose of their visit to the west country. Elly was expecting their first child to arrive some time in January. With congratulations all round Seb went and found a bottle of champagne in his fridge which for reasons of medical prudence Elly would not share.

XIX

The conversation in the space-wagon on the way to Cambridge that Monday morning was surprisingly animated. The events of Saturday night were still much to the fore, but when they had gone through the village Ben remembered his interest in the two houses and asked Marc what he knew about them.
"They’re not that old. They belonged to one family. The parents lived in one house and the daughter and son-in-law in the other. Then they suddenly decided to sell up and go to New Zealand, except the houses aren't sold yet because of the recession. Why? Are you interested, Ben?”
"We've got to find somewhere to live as we're staying in the area and I just liked the idea of the L-shaped cottage. It's on the right side of Cambridge for the Mythe and it's close for the family. Which brings me on to another thing. We've got to get out of college when the course ends. This is the last week of TP. I think we might be able to get a few days grace, but with all the excitement of the weekend and your news I forgot to ask if we could live at Oddstones in the interim."
Lewis had kept pretty quiet up to now, but chimed in with "You can always stay with me in Glasgow," which took the pressure off Marc to give a definite answer.
"As far as I'm concerned you can, but you had better talk to Elly, especially while you've got a few brownie points. Let me talk to her first. Then give her ring on Tuesday evening."
The lads got into college for eight and then it was back to routine for the last week of TP. Ben could not wait to finish school that day. Once he had a bee in his bonnet he was pretty single minded. By half past four he had visited the estate agent, been given the leaflets for the cottage, called The Nook, and had an appointment for the following evening to view. He just mentioned all this to Lewis, but did not want to distract him from his important task on the next morning.
As it was a Tuesday they had third form games together in the afternoon which meant he could get the full SP from Lewis. Apparently all had gone well. There was no need to say who had been in the class and who had been as bright as two new buttons. Unlike Ben he had received no official or unofficial clue to his performance overall, but his tutor seemed pretty satisfied. Ben asked him if he would like to come and help him view the Nook. Wild horses would not stop him. They organised an early meal and waited for the estate agent to pick them up at college. Even their after school run had gone out of the window.
When they were shown round the Nook they were surprised how spacious it was. Downstairs there were two large rooms, called reception rooms, a smaller study type room, the usual offices and a more than adequate kitchen. On the back was a conservatory which looked down a large garden that was mainly put down to lawn. The two upper floors were almost identical with three rooms each plus the bathroom. Even the loft had been converted and the whole was double-glazed, insulated and had central heating. The daytime rooms were at the back and with the garden faced southwest to get the most of the sun. Ben was obviously impressed and Lewis could not argue against him. As the previous occupants had emigrated they had left the carpets, curtains and fittings and a lot of the kitchen equipment to be included in the price. Although it was within Ben's price range he seriously underbid to be told by the agent that he would have to consult the owners. Finally he enquired about the other house. A couple with two children were being shown over it the following evening and they appeared to be serious.
Trying his luck Ben asked if he could pop into Oddstones on the way back to get his sister-in-law's advice. After persuading the agent, he could see Elly and find out whether she would agree to their staying there until they could move into permanent accommodation. Naturally the answer was yes and the agent drove them back to college content and with a further appointment for bargaining.
The rest of the week flashed past. Thursday afternoon games - who should be waiting behind, but the twins. Ben's mentor had told the games group that Ben and Lewis would be leaving at the end of the week and publicly thanked them for all they had done in the department. Of course he had also mentioned that Ben's absence would only be temporary as he would be returning in September and that while he was coming back as a maths teacher he would also be taking the U15 rugby squad. He could not help but notice two pairs of sparkling blue eyes light up even further, although nothing was said. After the others had gone home it was clear that Jack and Ted were doing nothing more than chatting Ben and Lewis up. Their teamwork was even more obvious. Although the conversation was mainly a collection of flattering remarks on both sides with thanks for making the lessons so enjoyable it was also dropped into the conversation that the twins had gone for county rugby trials and had gained their county caps as the two halfbacks. Being twins helped them to know what the other was thinking. The boys would not have gone home had not Ben and Lewis finally dismissed them in a kindly manner, for they still had their run to do. It was with a cheery goodbye that the boys left them, saying they would see them around tomorrow in school. After a thirty minute work-out they took a shower, changed, collected their books from the Common Room and made their way back to college. When they had arrived back at college they went for a cup of tea in Ben's room.
On the Friday they were summoned to the Headmaster's table for lunch during which he entertained them generally, but also made it clear that both of them had made a good impression. He knew Lewis had gained a post, but asked him to keep in touch with the school in case there were any future developments within the science department. He also enquired whether he had heard the result of his second teaching practice and on receiving a negative reply assured Lewis he had nothing worry about. In fact Lewis had an appointment with his tutor late that afternoon after school while Ben would be at the estate agent's. There would be no run after school that day. The twins were as good as their word and sought out our two heroes after lunch, waylaying them just as the Headmaster had finally shaken their hands and said goodbye. The boys were charm personified, even to having the common sense not to delay their ex-schoolmasters more than a couple of minutes.
Ben and Lewis met again at informal dinner. From the looks on their faces both of them obviously had something important to impart. Ben insisted that Lewis went first who announced that he had built his last TP grade up from a beta plus to an alpha minus. Ben felt a celebratory drink coming on and because he knew that most of the undergrads had gone down and that he and Lewis had the landing to themselves that weekend he also felt something else coming on. Ben on the other hand had come to an agreement with the estate agent acting on behalf of the émigrés and subject to the contract going through he would be the proud new owner of an L-shaped cottage some fifteen minutes away from Cambridge (outside the rush hour, naturally). If all went smoothly he could look forward to moving in during August.
As an area of high pressure was still dominating the weather they decided on a watering hole by the river. It was not just an evening of celebration but also one of earnest discussion about what they should do over the next week. They had won themselves a few more days in college before they had to vacate their rooms to American tourists or international conference visitors. The following Friday was their last day. They had to move their belongings out, not a great problem if Ben could secure a parking slot in college for which it was not difficult to obtain permission outside term. He also had to secure himself a solicitor, complete negotiations with the estate agent and untie his capital. Once the business was sorted out and the contracts signed they would disappear to Scotland, base themselves in Lewis' flat in Glasgow and if the weather looked settled, pack a tent in the car and take a short or a long tour of the Highlands, but before that Ben wanted to take Lewis down to stay with his parents for a long weekend to fulfil an open invitation they had been given.
It was already nearing eleven and time to return to college. They drank up and made their way back to college. It was no longer light as the sun had dipped below the horizon although the day had lost little of its warmth. On the tortuous way back they again passed through that narrow alley. As no one was in sight Ben took Lewis in a tight embrace, pressed him against the wall and gave him such a passionate kiss that neither of them would be left with any feeling of frustration that night.

XX

Over that weekend there was absolutely no pressure on Ben and Lewis. In fact the college resembled a ghost town and they could not conduct any business anyway. Having secured his parking bay for the rest of his residence Ben took the bus out to Oddstones on Saturday morning to bring his car back into Cambridge. As he entered the drive he saw Adam's and Jessica's car parked there. They were all sitting in the kitchen over a cup of tea along with Seb. So it also gave him a chance to bring the whole family up to date about what was going on. Adam and Jessica had only heard snatches relayed by Marc and Elly about what Ben had been up to over the past few weeks and decided there and then it might be a good idea to invite him and Lewis over to dinner one evening before they went away, for despite hearing so much they still had not met Lewis and as they viewed him as an unofficial future 'brother-in-law' they were keen to vet him. Ben promised he would ring to confirm.
The next eight weeks we shall take in synopsis. Dinner was duly taken the following week with Adam and Jessica and Lewis received their seal of approval which Jessica confided to Ben by telephone the following day. Actually he hadn't thought otherwise for childhood experience had taught him that if mother had approved, his sister was bound to follow suit and Lewis had such a winning way with the people he liked. On the other hand Ben had no wish to try his luck on what for him was such a sensitive and important issue. By Friday morning he had got as far as he could with the house purchase and its finance. It was just a matter of waiting for the conveyancing to be completed. He and Lewis had moved their worldly goods from college to Oddstones and vacated their rooms. They were now officially resident in the loft which gave the siblings some privacy although the little time they did spend there was divided between Seb's apartment and the main house. Friday lunchtime they were well on the way to the west country where they stayed until Tuesday. Subtly Ben's mother had provided the guests with the twin-bedded room which had formerly been Ben's room as a child. Over the weekend Lewis was treated with the same status as Seb had been even before Jessica's marriage to Adam, that is member-of-the family status. The boys took mother and father out to dinner on the Saturday evening which the parents unexpectedly and tastefully turned into a celebration of their son's friendship and their own acquisition of a quasi son-in-law. Ben and Lewis felt no embarrassment whatsoever, mainly because Ben had seen how they had accepted Marc's relationship with Seb, which incidentally had only been strengthened by his marriage to Elly. Being at his parents' home gave Ben the opportunity to take his camping gear out of the loft in preparation for the coming holiday.
Tuesday morning the pair were on their way back to Oddstones. Once there Ben took a rain check on the progress of the house purchase. If everything went to plan it would all tie up for the 1 August when he could collect the keys. Six weeks to go. Seb had left him a message to say that his friend in the modelling agency had been in touch and would Ben contact them. This he did and they wanted to know if he was interested in some freelance work. He made an appointment to see them on the Wednesday morning. After all he could not have foreseen what the previous year's session had led to for one thing and another with moving house any extra income would be welcome. Also it gave him the opportunity to be away from Lewis for a few hours and gain some personal space. The weekend with his parents had given him one or two things to think about and he needed solitude.
At the meeting he made some appointments for after his return from Scotland, then he got into his car and drove off to Ely for lunch and visited the cathedral. He sat in the nave and delved into his own thoughts for so long that he could attend Choral Evensong, not a service he liked, but which on this occasion formed a suitable conclusion to his introspection. After a little shopping in the city he returned to his motor and headed back to Cambridge. On Saturday he and Lewis packed the car and headed north, spent two nights in Lewis' Glasgow flat, then they started out on the grand tour. Before they left Ben tried to focus Lewis' mind on what to do about his flat, but Lewis still had a rather uncertain feeling about the future. Ben on the other hand thought he perceived why and this fell in with his thinking in the solitude of Ely cathedral.
The pair were lucky with the weather. They had found that period when the Atlantic lows skirt round the north of Scotland en route for Norway. Eventually during the grand tour they found themselves in Fort William and decided the next day they would climb Ben Nevis. They had started out early and on reaching the top experienced a great feeling of achievement. When they arrived they found a small contingent of Air Cadets there who were undertaking the challenge of climbing the highest peaks of Scotland, England and Wales within twenty-four hours. They had a brief chat with them before the exigencies of their task meant they had to get back to their transport for the next leg in the Lake District. After their disappearance Ben and Lewis felt the abandonment, but Ben judged the time just right. He gave Lewis that look which signified his rising passion. Lewis responded and they clasped each other round the body, smiling, laughing and looking into each other's eyes when Ben finally summoned up the courage to say what he had been wanting to say for days, weeks, perhaps even months, and despite the thorough thought he still did not really know how to phrase it, but overcome by the moment he drew breath and in a half whisper said "Lewis, I love you. Will you become my partner for life?"
Lewis showed no surprise. He just said "Give me a kiss before I say anything." The kiss seemed to last a lifetime. They were just coming up for breath when they heard the approach, but some way off, of another party of climbers. With a whisper of "Why on earth didn't I think of asking you? Of course I will," a brief kiss sealed the pact and they separated before they could be seen by the new arrivals.
They bounced their way down the mountain, at times hand in hand when there was no one in sight, and reached the car. Over the next few days they talked about how their relationship should develop. They still did not want to come out officially for professional reasons, but they had decided to keep their decision private until they could organise a housewarming party just for the family. Once they had moved into the new home, Lewis would put his flat on the market. The holiday over Ben left Lewis in Glasgow and returned south. They agreed to meet again towards the end of July at Oddstones. Two whole weeks apart.
On his return to Cambridgeshire Ben checked with the estate agent. The contract was ready for him to sign and on the first day of August he could collect the keys. He would not move in straight away as he knew certain jobs had to be done. To be fitted into this programme were Ben's modelling commitments. With Lewis back they could decide on the final use of the rooms and carry out any decorating required. Also certain items of furniture would have to be purchased. Over the holiday they had discussed the practicalities of living together. They were well aware that even with their tight emotional bond they needed their own space at times and so they arranged to make the ground floor communal, the top floor of one wing was to belong to Lewis and the top floor of the other to Ben which gave them each a bedroom, study, spare room for guests and a toilet and bathroom. Where they slept would depend on mood and circumstances. Therefore there was plenty to be done and one other arrangement could not be overlooked.
On pledging to live with one another they had promised to exchange rings which had yet to be selected. On the 1 August Ben was to be found promptly at nine o’clock outside the estate agent's office. The formality of collecting the keys lasted less than a quarter of an hour and then he was the proud owner of 'The Nook'. He could discover little about his potential neighbours but the fact that they had signed contracts and it was just a waiting game until they could move in. Then with Lewis he went to the jeweller's with the express intention of choosing identical rings, signet rings to be engraved with the recipient's initials. The jeweller was the height of discretion for it would have been natural curiosity to wonder at the purpose of the purchase, although the subterfuge of buying identical rings for oneself would have fooled few people. The engraved rings could be collected the following week. Over coffee in Ottakar's Ben and Lewis planned their campaign. Shopping finished they would travel straight back to the Nook and take possession. They joked about giving it another name, a combination of their own abbreviated names, but decided it wouldn't work. They named the 15 August as their official moving-in day in the hope that furniture and kitchen equipment would be installed by then. Housewarming the following weekend and a fortnight to settle before the start of the new school year. With a change of heart they also decided that their first night there would be the occasion when they would exchange rings.
By noon they had arrived. Ben insisted on Lewis holding his hand while it turned the key. They crossed the threshold. Electricity yes, gas yes, water yes, telephone no. Still that was of little inconvenience as they each had their mobiles. They explored as if they had been there for the first time. From the top floor Ben's bedroom looked north east, his study southwest over the gardens. The boundaries had been marked out roughly by the surveyors, for the previous occupants had needed neither fence nor hedge. Ben hoped it would cause no trouble, but would wait until he had met the new neighbours before taking any action.
Over the following fourteen days our two lads worked like beavers preparing the home that they wanted. Furniture and tradesmen arrived in dribs and drabs. The cottage was gradually becoming a home, one they both felt proud of. Then after a day in town tying up odds and ends they noticed on their return a Mercedes parked on the other side of the drive.
"That must be our new neighbours," Lewis remarked.
"Let’s just get sorted," said Ben, "and we’ll go and introduce ourselves and ask them over for a cup of tea." Ben went up to his study to empty his pockets and put the credit card receipts on his desk. As he heard the joyful shouts of children playing in the garden he peered out of the window. To say the least he was amazed at what he saw. "Lewis," he shouted, "come and have a look at this!"
"What?" said Lewis as he bounded up the stairs.
"It’s our new neighbours."
"Yees?"
"Well, take a look!" Lewis walked across to the window.
"My God, I don’t believe it."
"Nor did I to begin with, but both of us have spotted them now." There, down on the back lawn wrestling with each other were the new neighbours' two children, none other than Jack and Ted.

XXI

Ben and Lewis were at a loss. They did not know whether to panic or cheer, to be embarrassed or glad. Should they go across right now? Well, time would not alter anything and they would have to confront the fact sooner or later. Why not sooner? And anyway what had gone unsaid was that they had not seen the twins for two months and they had sorely missed them. Lewis put the kettle on to boil before they both went across and rang at the front door of the neighbouring house. It was opened by the lady of the house.
"Hello," they said in unison, "we're your new neighbours." They felt rather foolish as it came across like a pantomime act.
"I’m Ben."
"And I'm Lewis." It was getting worse. They almost giggled. Their neighbour broke the spell and introduced herself as Christina Batty. They'd obviously known that she was Mrs Batty, but couldn't say anything.
"We've just put the kettle on and wondered if you and your family would like to come across for a cup of tea."
"We'd love to. I'll just call my husband and the boys. They're in the garden."
Lewis could not help but notice that Christina was giving Ben a puzzled look. Ben tried not to notice. He just said "Come across when you're ready." Five minutes later there was a commotion at the front door and all four had arrived with a familiar and cheery "Hello, sirs" from Jack and Ted.
"You appear to have met before."
"Yes. It's our games masters from school. You know, the ones we told you about." Temporarily Mr Batty seemed to have been left out in the cold.
"Now I know where I've seen you before, Ben," said Christina. "Aren't you the one in the advert on the back of the buses? The boys have spoken a lot about you."
At this Mr Batty coughed to draw attention to himself and said "I’m Phil. How do you do." They shook hands and all four were led into the kitchen.
Lewis busied himself making the tea, while Ben took out plates and cut up slices of Elly's home-made fruit cake.
"I can't get over this coincidence moving next door to you like this." The twins were pretty pleased as well.
"When are you actually moving in?" enquired Ben trying take the spotlight off himself.
"Next Tuesday the furniture van arrives and after that we shall be in residence," said Phil. "I've taken a week off work to try and get everything organised."
"Well, we're having our housewarming party on the following Sunday. You will be most welcome if you’re free."
"Does that include us, sir?" piped up Jack.
"Of course. The more the merrier, and please don't call us 'sir' at home. It's Ben and Lewis. Otherwise we'll call you the Batty boys. Mind you, school's different. Okay?"
"Okay, sir, I mean Ben," said Ted, though it sounded like a piece of gentle mickey-taking.
The conversation continued in a lively manner as tea and cake were consumed in double quantities and each fought to get a word in edgeways. Once the food had disappeared, so did the boys.
"See you later, sirs. Sorry, Lewis and Ben," in unison.
Phil and Christina remained behind, mainly to get some peace and quiet. Proud of their efforts Ben and Lewis gave their new neighbours a guided tour of the house. They could tell that Christina was dying to know why they were living together and the separate bedrooms threw her off the scent although the double beds in each did not go unnoticed. There was no edge to her. It was just typical woman's curiosity. On the other hand she casually mentioned how the twins doted on each other. They were virtually inseparable and she could never see a girl splitting them.
"We love them dearly and they're a lot of fun as you'll find out if you haven't done so already." From what Ben had seen at school he sensed there might be a story behind it all, but thought it was too soon to enquire. He certainly had his own thoughts on the matter. He also noticed that the twins had inherited their brilliant blue eyes and fair hair from both parents.
After the Battys had gone and when our lads had finished what they had set out to do they climbed into Ben's car for the Sainsbury's run and stocked up so that they could move in on the next day and survive the weekend. Some flowers for Elly, then back to Oddstones for the last night. They could have moved in there and then, but they wanted to take Seb, Marc and Elly out to dinner in appreciation of their tolerance over the previous few months.
The next day, Saturday the 15th, Lewis and Ben put their final belongings into the car, tidied their quarters in the loft and said goodbye to Marc and Elly, leaving them a key to their new home, giving them an open invitation to call whenever they wanted to and reminding them about the housewarming. On arrival they noticed the Mercedes was parked there again, but just went inside. After all their hard work they spent a lazy afternoon in the garden until five when they went indoors, showered, changed into their bodysocks and set to work in the kitchen. Lewis was duty chef and Ben carried out all the ancillary work. Once the decision on head chef had been made they were very good at forming a team for meals and very rarely clashed on what they were doing.
During the preparations there was a sudden thump of a football against the side of the house, followed by shouts and running and finally two cheeky grinning faces at the kitchen window with a call of "Hey, Mister, can we have our ball back, please?" However, the grins soon changed to interested amazement when the twins saw their new neighbours dressed in bodysocks, bright red for Ben, light green for Lewis. At first they could hardly take their eyes off them until an involuntary "Cor, their packets are even bigger than ours," from Jack gained him a thump on the arm from Ted who called out "Thanks" as Ben and Lewis gave their assent.
"That'll do my reputation a lot of good next term," remarked Ben.
"I don't think you’ve got a lot to worry about. After all they saw us in the showers last term. I'm beginning to think that it's a case of 'People in glasshouses shouldn't throw stones'. I think that's one reason why they like us."
"And I think I tend to agree. I can't help wondering whether it is pure coincidence they moved next door to us, though I can't see how it could be otherwise."
"Put it down to destiny. When you look back it's been a strange sequel of events altogether." "Careful," said Ben, "the spuds are boiling over."
Ben went to set the table in the dining room. He drew the curtains to avoid any curiosity from outside, although with the middle of August the nights were drawing in fast. On the table he placed a candlestick and lit the candle. In the centre stood two red roses in a small vase, a reminder of their first declaration of passion on St Valentine's Day. Finally the meal was served and they sat down. A claret had been chosen to accompany the roast beef. Not only was this choice of menu a favourite of our two young men, but it was a dummy run for the family lunch to be held as part of the housewarming the following weekend. After the pudding had been served and enjoyed they withdrew to the drawing room taking their glasses and the unconsumed claret with them and Lewis sat down on the settee. Ben put on a CD, quietly playing in the background, then filled the glasses with wine. They stood and Ben proposed a toast.
"To us and to a long, healthy and loving life together." They touched glasses and drank with their right arms entwined. This was followed by their taking the signet rings out of the boxes and placing them on the third finger of the other's left hand and together they declaimed "May we wear these symbols of our eternal love until our dying days."
"We'll celebrate the 15 August as the anniversary of our Day of Commitment," suggested Lewis. "Agreed," said Ben.
"Agreed," repeated Lewis and they drank from their glasses again, put them down, took each other in their arms and celebrated their spiritual union with a long kiss. The material of the skin-tight bodysocks enhanced the feeling as their bodies closed together in an intimate embrace and their feelings became aroused. They could control their passion no longer.
"Your room or mine?" said Lewis.
"I'll toss you for it," riposted Ben with a grin, and they only just made it to the top floor before completely losing control. In the morning they came down late to face the uncleared dining table and the washing up.

XXII

The following week passed unremarkably. Tuesday the Batty family duly moved in and our two heroes were on hand to provide refreshment if needed. All four of them worked like slaves to bring some order into the new house and neither of the twins shirked their tasks or sneaked off to play games in the garden. Friday Ben's parents arrived at Oddstones from the west country and in the evening came for a sneak preview of the house. Various parts of the family met and did things together on Saturday, but left the boys alone to get on with the important matter of preparing for Sunday. The house had to be hoovered and dusted from top to bottom, the food and the drinks bought in and the garden tidied, all in preparation for inquisitive eyes. On Sunday the whole family attended early Communion at the parish church. Ben and Lewis scurried back home for the final preparations and at twelve they were ready for the first guests. As well as entertaining they had to keep an eye on the Sunday joint, but were relieved when Jessica offered to take over.
From the noise you could hear that the party was going particularly well. Tony and Margaret were entertaining Phil and Christina Batty with stories of their various children and the way they had intermarried. Ben's parents were fussing over their children and children-in-law, particularly Elly. Meanwhile the twins had cut loose and cornered Ben and Lewis. Not only that, they exploited the opportunity of their parents' being busy talking to issue an instant invitation to come and view their den in the new house. When they reached the den, Ben and Lewis were amazed at the size of the room. In it everything was in duplicate: the desks, the chairs, the computers, the poster boards, the wardrobes and chest of drawers, everything with one exception and that one exception was the large double bed which dominated. Looking at the picture boards Ben was astonished to see in a prominent position the modelling photos he had sent them earlier in the year.
"If you like you can have a sample of this year's, that's if there's anything there you fancy."
"If there's anything we fancy?" chimed in Ted.
"Is the Pope Catholic?" retorted Jack. During the guided tour the conversation took a strange turn. Ben and Lewis could scarcely believe they were not dreaming it. Yet afterwards that evening they individually corroborated what the other remembered. It started something like this.
"We just loved those bodysuits you were wearing last weekend," started Jack.
"Where did you get them from?" enquired Ted.
"You'd better have a chat with my brother-in-law Seb," replied Ben. "He got them for one of our bachelor weekends."
"Can you get a couple for us?" asked Jack.
"We'll certainly try," said Lewis.
"But it will cost you," said Ben.
"How much?" asked Ted.
"Oh, not money," continued Ben, "but something in kind."
"What do you mean?" asked Jack.
"Well, just think back to the time when we first had games lessons together and you took off your tracksuits. Jack, you were sporting some fantastic white kit which fitted in all the right places, and you, Ted, were wearing a Linford Christie type Lycra running suit. We were so taken that we couldn't take our eyes off you, and not only did you notice, but we think you’d planned it."
"Us?" said Jack turning to his brother.
"Not us," said Ted, both looking hurt in order to stifle their giggles.
"We'll swap you a bodysock each for photos of you in that kit."
"Easy-peasy," said Jack.
"Lemon squeezy," said Ted.
"Done," they said together. "We'll get the digital camera, put the pictures on the computer and then we'll print them to look as if they're on photographic paper however you want them done. We'll take them this afternoon."
Why were they so willing, Ben asked himself, but soon it all became clear. The conversation continued in a lively manner until Jack suddenly asked "Do live together because you're gay?"
"Why do you ask?" Ben enquired cautiously.
"We’re homosexual," answered Ted.
"Incestuously homosexual," explained Jack.
"At least that's what Dad says we are," continued Ted. Jack took over.
"It's the twin thing, even though we're not identical. Maybe its even because we're not identical. We've always been together and we don't like being parted. It feels as if a bit of us is missing, and we've always slept together for as long as we can remember."
"Apart from when we're ill or away from home," added Ted.
"A couple of years ago Mum and Dad suggested we had our own rooms."
"But we said no."
"Then they suggested they would 'treat us' to new beds, which was code for single beds."
"But we then said an emphatic no."
"And we were a bit naughty and ganged up on them and as you can see we still sleep together and we'll say no more than that."
"I don't think you have to," said Ben with a knowing wink and a nod from Lewis.
"Is that why you went on holiday on Mykonos?"
"How do you know we went to Mykonos?"
"We recognised it from the photo," said Lewis.
"Mum and Dad thought it was just a Greek island. When we got there they didn't notice anything at first and so we got let off the lead," said Ted.
"When Dad became dubious it was too late. We enjoyed being chatted up." added Jack, "but remember we are the Atomic Twins - we’re difficult to split."
"But what about school?" asked Ben. "Do your mates know about all this?"
"Not as far as we know," continued Ted. "We've always made an effort to behave ourselves and anyway they don’t know us well enough at the Mythe yet."
"But you seemed pretty popular," said Lewis.
"It's the entertainment value of being twins and we do in fact make a pretty good double act," said Jack.
"And the test will come next term when we go for the halfback slot in the rugby team after the same pair have kept it for three years," continued Ted.
"I ought not to be listening to this," said Ben.
"But we were the U12, U13 and U14 county halfbacks," reminded Jack.
"And the Mythe did send theirs to the trials last year," interjected Ted.
"Anyway, we'll make a bargain with you. If you don't mention my relationship with Lewis, I won't mention yours."
"You drive a hard bargain," said Jack.
"But done," said Ted and as they shook on it Ben both times felt the palm of his hand being stroked.
Changing the subject Lewis enquired why the twins had swapped schools and gone to the Mythe in year nine.
"That's another family secret, but you're bound to find out sooner or later," said Jack.
Ted went on "We never felt stretched at the comp and at times we misbehaved out of sheer boredom."
"Nothing serious," said Jack.
"And then," continued Ted, "earlier in the year our family fortunes changed. Mum and Dad won the National Lottery and so here we are: new house, new school, new car and Dad still insists on working." Ben looked at his watch and drew in a sudden breath.
"We've been here ages and we're supposed to be hosting a party. It’s a good job Jessica's taken over cooking the lunch."
As they went down the stairs, Jack said "Who’s Jessica?"
"She's my sister," replied Ben.
"What about the one who supplies the bodysocks?" asked Ted.
"That's Seb."
"Is he your brother?"
"No. You'll find it terribly complicated, but he's my brother-in-law."
"So he's Jessica’s husband?" The twins were certainly tenacious in their inquisitiveness.
"No. He's Jessica's husband's elder brother, but he's also the elder brother of my sister-in-law Elly. So you see there's a double marriage in the family."
"So who's Seb married to?"
"Well, he's not and this is where it becomes even more complicated. Elly is married to Marc, my elder brother. Seb was and still is my brother's first boyfriend."
"So Marc and Seb are gay as well?" That was Jack.
"Not exactly," said Ben, fighting to keep his head clear on the matter. "Seb is gay, but Marc is bisexual."
"You must come from a very broad-minded family," said Ted.
"That's hard to say because you don't know what it's like in other families. I've grown up with it and we've always accepted it as part of our life and got on with it."
Meanwhile they were back at the house. They slipped in through the front door to find various people in various rooms, obviously enjoying themselves talking and drinking and the hosts and the twins hadn't even been missed.
"Introduce us to Seb," said Jack.
"We'd love to meet him," said Ted.
"We'll chat him up," said Jack. Lewis took the twins to find Seb while Ben peeled off to the kitchen to find Jessica looking radiant as she slaved over a hot kitchen stove.
"Sorry, Jess, I got waylaid by the people next door. I’ll get cracking now."
"No. It's all right. You go and look after your guests and I'll grab you when I need some help." "How many are we?"
"Eleven."
"Do you think we could squeeze in the four Battys?"
"It will be a squeeze, but if you can find the table space, the cutlery and crockery, I'll find the food.' "Cutlery and crockery are not a problem because Elly and Marc brought a whole lot across with them. I'll go and ask the Battys. You’re sure?"
"Of course I'm sure. How many years have I been a member of this family and we've never turned anyone away hungry yet?"
"Just yell when you want some help."
Ben went and circulated. He smiled to himself when he saw that the twins had first cornered Seb and were now leading him out of the front door, obviously intent on giving him the guided tour. They were smooth operators and so affable in their manner. Their parents must be proud of them.
Somehow fifteen people were seated round the table and fed. Fortunately Ben and Lewis had overestimated quantities when they had gone shopping. It was interesting to see the Batty family dotted about the table. Only the twins had remained unsplit and they were comfortably sandwiched between Seb and Lewis. Once the pudding plates had been cleared away everyone started relaxing at table over coffee when Ben stood up and without a word commanded silence. He asked Lewis to stand alongside him and they thanked the guests for coming.
"We also have a family announcement to make. As you all know, Lewis and I have been together for some time now and our relationship has never been a secret. Now that we are finally fully qualified and have gained useful employment we have come to the decision to dedicate our lives to one another." He could say no more as the family and their guests cheered and applauded, but notably all four of the guests. Seb was the one who took over then as he stood up and congratulated the couple on behalf of those assembled while Ben's father and Tony took their turn to stand up and welcome Lewis as a member of the family.
However, the celebrations were nowhere near an end for it was the turn of Adam to stand and ask Jessica to rise for the announcement that they were expecting their first child in the following March. After a shower of congratulations, hugs and kisses Marc in his turn begged silence and holding Elly's hand said that good things always came in threes and that they had a further announcement concerning their future, namely that it had been confirmed over the last week that Elly was now expecting twins. Again applause, congratulations, hugs and kisses, but those most affected by the news were surprisingly, or perhaps not so surprisingly, Jack and Ted themselves.
Lewis said that this called for champagne which they just happened to have in the fridge, bought two days ago for special occasions, but not thought to be needed so soon. Lewis and Ben rushed around and collected all the glasses they could find for an instant wash-up and within a quarter of an hour the champagne arrived, was uncorked and served.
The excitement over, the party started to break up, but not before Tony and Margaret had taken Ben and Lewis on one side to emphasise the words they had said about being full members of the family, wishing them all the best and offering any help they might be able to give. Marc said that there would be a drink for them at Oddstones from eight onwards if they had recovered from the party sufficiently to stroll across. The Batty parents thanked them for making them feel welcome so soon in their new home and although they did not know what or how they did already recognise that Ben and Lewis had inspired something in their sons. Suddenly it was quiet. Ben and Lewis just collapsed onto the settee and fell asleep. They awoke an hour later feeling like death warmed up and with the clearing up still to be done.

XXIII

And so over a year had passed since Marc's and Elly's wedding and the significant events of the stagnight. Lewis and Ben were now hoping they could settle down to a fortnight of relative peace until the beginning of their respective terms and with them the first posts of their careers. However, it was not to be so. On the Monday morning Lewis received news that his flat had been sold, more or less at the price he had asked, but the couple now had to hurry up to Scotland to arrange for the removal of Lewis' belongings to Cambridge. That took a few days, but then he had to hand over the keys to the estate agent and beat the removal van to reach the Nook before it did. Some of his furniture fitted nicely into his floor or the communal ground floor. Other items had to be stored in the garage until he could arrange for their sale. Most important his model railway could be set up in the loft although it would be the Christmas holidays before any attempt was made at that. With the receipt of funds from the flat he could offer his partner a substantial sum towards the cost of buying the Nook. Not only did that put their relationship on a more equitable financial footing, but it had tax advantages as well. It also enabled Lewis to buy a car which he needed for school and gave him some financial independence over and above his salary.
In the meantime the twins had been as good as their word. The portraits had been photographed and duly processed on the computer and they had presumably known what Ben and Lewis were looking for, as they would not have produced better themselves, had Ben been supervising the shoot with his professional knowledge. Lewis and Ben received identical packets with individual exposures of Jack and Ted in the agreed sports gear and retaken with them together, plus a CD-ROM of the prints. There were also additional shots which no less attracted their attention. Equally Seb had enabled them to keep their part of the bargain by previously supplying the bodysocks in their chosen colours and they too had made due appearance in the folios.
However, before school began in September there was to be one occasion into which, it later became clear, the twins had manipulated their unsuspecting parents when they could claim Lewis' and Ben's undivided and undisturbed attention.
Christina Batty appeared on the doorstep of the Nook one morning and was readily invited in for coffee. She obviously felt some embarrassment at the request she was about to make, if only because the neighbours had known each other for such little time. Phil and Christina had a short time ago arranged a long weekend away without the boys who were to be left in the charge of her sister and family. Unfortunately her sister had broken her leg and they did not feel it was fair to impose two fourteen year old boys on her in that state for the bank holiday weekend. Jack and Ted were not backward in coming forward to suggest that they could stay at home and Ben and Lewis might be their babysitters. They'd be perfectly happy with that and if mother didn't ask they certainly would, and they couldn't possibly spoil their parents' weekend away by accompanying them. In any case there was no spare accommodation. Phil and Christina were unable to come up with a better solution either. Our heroes were more than happy to help in any way they could and readily agreed without thought for the implications. In fact they thought that Christmas and their birthdays had suddenly all come at once. The twins might have to muck in and give them a hand with some jobs about the house and garden, but they were so outgoing and ready to make the best of everything that they readily accepted anything that was provided for them and the Battys insisted they should cover all the expenses the four incurred. Christina promptly called Jack and Ted across from their house and they were sat down in the kitchen while the ground rules were set out by their mother. Lewis and Ben couldn't help smiling to themselves as it became clear that while Christina believed she was in charge her sons had actually wound her round their little fingers and rather too readily agreed to all the conditions she set out. Lewis and Ben agreed despite hardly getting a word in edgeways.
Accordingly on the Friday morning Jack and Ted brought their kit across which they deposited in the spare room in Ben's wing, dutifully waved their parents goodbye as the Mercedes departed down the drive and were now, theoretically at least, in the charge of their brand new nextdoor neighbours who, excited at the prospect, had formed a plan of work and entertainment for the weekend for which they sought and easily gained the agreement of their young charges.
The first thing that sprang to Ben's mind was the impending rugby season. With all the excitement of decorating, moving into the Nook and moving Lewis out of his Glasgow flat personal fitness had gone by the board. So not without an ulterior motive he sent the twins off to change and he was not disappointed when after their return and warming up they took off their tracksuits to reveal the Lycra running suits and Ben was pleased he had decided to wear his, as yet hidden by his unshed tracksuit. It was not entirely coincidental either that Jack had brought the digital camera across with him, and he was certainly ready with it when Ben finally decided he had thoroughly warmed up. The main workout consisted of a run through the lanes and public footpaths and to prevent any monotony Ben had planned a programme of fartlek. The one who needed the most encouragement was Lewis as Ben found even he really had to put in an effort to keep one step ahead of Jack and Ted. On their return and after a short break they got a rugby ball out and practised their routines which had been so successful in gaining them their schoolboy county caps. Lewis volunteered to prepare a snack lunch.
Ben was really impressed with the effort the twins had put into the the whole morning and soon realised that they were out to impress before the real competition for team places began in September. Somewhat recovered from his earlier exertions Lewis came out and used the opportunity for a photo call with Jack's digital camera as well as his own normal one, taking advantage of the good light as the sun approached its meridian.
Finally Lewis called all three in for lunch. Disappointingly the boys put their tracksuits back on and went and stuck their heads under the cold tap. Over the lunch table in the kitchen they discussed the arrangements for the weekend. Lewis had made sure that there was copious iced water on the table to compensate for the morning's dehydration. This afternoon work had to be done and although Lewis and Ben made it clear throughout that Jack and Ted were free to come and go as they wished and do whatever they wanted the twins enthusiastically offered to join in with whatever was going on. First job after lunch was the Sainsbury's run. After that the grass had to be mowed and immediately Ted offered their family's brand new sit-on motor mower and they would cut the lawns for both houses. In the evening it would be dinner and relaxation, television or a video. On Saturday Ben and Lewis thought they might try the new leisure centre and country club that had recently opened at which Jack broke in and said that they had been given a year's premier membership as a birthday present and that they could each sign a guest in free for a day as part of the deal.
Then Ted said "What are we doing in the evening?"
"Nothing in particular," replied Lewis.
"Why?"
"Well. we'd like to cook you a meal," said Jack.
"We're quite good actually," said Ted.
"Though we ought not to say it ourselves," completed Jack.
"And what about Sunday?" they enquired in unison.
"Well again you don't have to do this, but as we told your mother we've had a family day organised for rather a long time, but we can work round it," said Ben.
"Will Seb be there?" asked Jack.
"I imagine so," answered Ben. Their faces lit up.
"We're on," said Ted.
"We have a little unfinished business still to transact," said Jack. Lewis and Ben looked puzzled, but made no enquiries. They thought it might concern bodysocks.
"By the way," said Ben, "you might find this strange, but we've made the arrangement that all the men wear 501s."
"We do things like that," explained Lewis. "It's a form of corporate identity and without you might end up paying for the drinks."
"We're too young," piped up Jack.
"Since we met you we've found nothing strange," said Ted.
"Wouldn't wear any other jeans," said Jack.
"Haven't you seen us in ours?" said Ted.
"Knowing you two you'd have noticed," said Jack and the twins winked at one another.
"Then on Monday," said Lewis with emphasis and a cough before the conversation got out of hand we thought of the Duxford air display."
"Sounds good to us," retorted Jack and Ted.
As good as their word Jack and Ted helped with the shopping at the supermarket. Ben invited them to put whatever they wanted into the trolley as they would need things for their Saturday night cooking adventure. On their return to the Nook they took charge of mowing the grass and while on the motor-mower they covered the two gardens. Meanwhile Lewis and Ben did the laborious part of cutting the edges. At the end of a warm afternoon Ben organised cold drinks and Lewis arranged the garden furniture on the patio and they sat back sunning themselves to get the last touches of a tan before autumn set in.
Finally it was time to cook and the twins disappeared over to their own house for an hour. On their return our boys' pleasure was enhanced to see that they were sporting the new bodysocks that Seb had procured for them, both in turquoise blue which certainly suited their eyes and complexion. The suits fitted perfectly over their packets and buttocks and Lewis and Ben found it essential in order to honour the occasion to change into theirs.
On their return Jack said
"Ben, as a professional, you know about this sort of thing."
"What’s that?"
"Are you supposed to wear a jockstrap with these?"
"I would in public," said Ben, "but in private it's up to you. Whatever you feel comfortable with." "Well, we're not in public at the moment, are we?" said Jack.
"And we're not wearing one anyway. So it doesn’t matter really, does it?" added Ted with a smile and an air of defiance towards his brother.
"We’ve noticed," chimed in Lewis smiling.
"And we've got no criticism whatsoever, either," commented Ben, also with a smile, or rather a grin. "We love you the way you are," said Lewis provocatively.
"But," continued Ben, "if you do, you ought to wear one of those dancer's jockstraps, the ones they call a dance-belt with the single strap that goes up your crevice." The twins' eyes lit up.
"We haven't tried one of those."
"You can get them at Pate's in Cambridge."
"That's where you got yours?" said Ted cheekily, eying up the pair with a critical mien.
"Photo calls apart it's the first chance we've had to wear them," said Jack as they both felt the the admiring glances made towards them.
"Just feel the material," added Ted, seeing how far they could go, and both Ben and Lewis took this as permission to pat and stroke their bottoms, which, forgetting for the moment that the twins were only fourteen, they found satisfyingly firm. Ben enquired whether they were allowed to drink wine at home and upon an affirmative opened a bottle of claret and set four glasses on the dining-room table.
The four were happy to sit and chat over the meal. Lewis and Ben reminisced over the story of how they had become so friendly with the Batty family (for 'family' read 'twins') and as the wine had in fact loosened the twins' tongues Ben took this as an opportunity to satisfy his curiosity.
"Well, Jack and Ted, you know the story from our point of view. Let’s hear it from yours."
"Oh, that's easy," said Ted.
"As you said, it was built on a series of happy coincidences," continued Jack. "Let's go back to the beginning, that maths class at the comp. There you were, Ben, among the visitors. I could hardly believe my eyes. So I turned to Ted and said 'Isn't that the bloke in Stud, you know the one in the Lynx advert?'". "'You should know. You've got it on your poster board,' I replied. 'He’s amazing,' you said."
Then Jack continued. "I had butterflies in my stomach and then I noticed that you were looking at us. You weren't paying the least bit of attention to the lesson. Okay, we weren't either, and when we made eye contact you smiled." Ben blushed. "That's when we decided we would chat you up at the end of the lesson and I was going write a note and slip it into your pocket."
Ted took up the story. "We just loved it afterwards and we knew you fancied us, as well. Anyway, that was the end of it until we received the photos. You didn't put your address inside. So we couldn't thank you and all we found out after was that you were in a group from the University Department of Education."
Jack took over. "And that was it until that time on the station in the Easter holidays. From the way you hugged each other we knew you were either brothers or 'partners' and you don't look like brothers. I went weak at the knees to see you again, Ben, and Ted went weak at the knees when he saw you, Lewis, and from the conversation we knew you were interested for a start."
"We’ve always had people chatting us up," said Ted.
"Especially at the rugby club," interrupted Jack.
"But you were the first guys we ever felt like chatting up. When we told you we had changed schools and you said you were teaching at our new one, we couldn't believe our luck."
"So that's when we started planning, not all at once, but over a period. First of all the kit. After that there was never any doubt you fancied us. Then we worked on the shower. Neither of you ever came to supervise us in the showers and now we know why. So we had to try something else and it didn't take long to realise that you always did some sort of fitness after the lesson before coming back to the pavilion to shower and get changed yourselves. It was so routine."
Jack let Ted continue. "It was easy enough to hide, both ourselves and our kit. You thought everyone had gone home - you even checked. We waited until we saw you coming back, stripped off quickly and hid in the showers until you'd gone into the staff changing room when we switched on the showers and you found us. You didn't have your towels with you, so we were on equal terms, as it were, and did your eyes pop out of your heads!"
"Mind you, ours did as well," said Jack.
"We also sent you some holiday snaps through the school post. Objective achieved. School went on smoothly until you left, but the news that you at least, Ben, would be back in September, plus you were to be our rugby master really cheered us up."
"But no way could even we have known that Mum and Dad were going to buy the house nextdoor to yours and now we're neighbours."
"Friends," contradicted Jack.
"Family friends," countered Ted. Ben and Lewis raised their eyebrows in pleasant surprise, but said nothing.
Finally it was time to clear away which the twins joined in with and they spent the rest of the evening all four sat cosily on the settee in front of the television, obviously enjoying the closeness of their bodies enwrapped as they were in Lycra. At eleven they climbed the stairs after a strenuous day. Ben was sleeping in Lewis' room lest any of the things that go bonk in the night should cause a disturbance.

XXIV

Saturday turned out to be a great success. With hindsight it was obvious that the twins had between them organised the events while wisely giving the impression that Ben and Lewis were in charge. Everyone was down to breakfast by half past seven and shortly after eight they were loading bags of sports equipment and personal kit into Ben's car.
When they arrived, our two young men were, since it was their first visit, visibly impressed with the set-up. The concern was divided into three parts. The twins signed their guests in at the leisure centre. They had their photo taken and within five minutes were each issued with a go-anywhere do-anything day pass and a locker key. The leisure centre was the usual windowless building one would normally expect, while connected to it by a glass passageway was the country club which was set out as a hotel. It contained bars, lounges, a restaurant, a self-service cafeteria, two conference rooms, even a hairdresser's and shop, each marked with the expected dress code. In fact on the top floor were hotel rooms. Outside as well as an eighteen hole golf course were tennis courts, cricket nets with a bowling machine and swimming pool, more for recreation than the more serious indoor pool.
The four started in the fitness room as a warm-up and it was clear why Jack and Ted at so tender an age had such well defined sixpacks. After that they split, the twins to play squash, Ben and Lewis to play badminton. At eleven they met in one of the bars and after liquid refreshment went off to the skating rink. Lewis remarked to Ben that neither lad gave any quarter or performed any task half-heartedly and Ben was impressed with the way they dressed in the appropriate immaculate kit for each activity. As all four were beginning to feel the effects of their efforts, they went off to the cafeteria dressed in their tracksuits for a long lunch break which ended with their reading the papers in the scruff lounge. They discussed the afternoon programme - tennis followed by the swimming pool, followed by what the twins called a particular treat to end with, but would then say no more.
Ben and Lewis mused over their relationship with the twins. It was less than six months since they had met and since then a strange sequence of coincidences had occurred to form a relationship which had transcended the normal pupil-teacher relationship and they were fast becoming firm family friends without overstepping the bounds of unacceptable familiarity. Ben wondered how he would fare with them at school next term, but their track record had given him nothing to worry about so far.
On the tennis court they split to make a more even game. Had Ben and Lewis performed the impossible? "We are after all the Atomic Twins - we're difficult to split," echoed in their minds.
"Anatomic twins - now that's far more interesting," thought Lewis, but kept the thought to himself. Ben naturally partnered Jack while Ted willingly played with Lewis and it was a hard fought game with the set going 7-6, 7-7 and so on until they had to play a tiebreaker to keep within their allotted time with Ben and Jack finally gaining the victory.
Then off to the indoor swimming pool. As they had the changing room to themselves the twins inaugurated a posing competition, not so much to show themselves off, but as a prelude to what was to come. In the pool they chased one another up and down the chutes, ducked each other and took full advantage of the wave machine.
Exhausted they left the pool and dried themselves and as Jack wrapped a towel round his naked body he said "And now off to the sauna!" Likewise clad in nothing but a towel all four went off to the sauna which they found empty. They discarded their towels and disported themselves on the benches, too tired to talk, just relaxing after their physically demanding day. Halfway between waking and dreaming Ben's thoughts went back to that fateful time after squash when alone in the shower with Lewis he was unable to disguise his passion. That had been the culmination of the getting to know Lewis process, caused by a lust he could no longer suppress. Fortunately it led Lewis on. It could have gone so disastrously wrong, but he took it as a compliment and in his dream Ben relived the moment until he woke up with a start realising that it was no longer a dream, but reality. As he opened his eyes he expected to be the object of everyone's amusement, the butt of jokes. Yes, all three were obviously entertained, but it was nothing new for Lewis anyway. However, there was no cause for superiority as he had led the way and the other three were all in the same state and yet no one was embarrassed, except perhaps Ben himself who dearly wanting to relieve his passion by his own hand could only banish the thought by replacing it with a desire to give Jack a hand. And from the look on Jack's face his thoughts were not dissimilar. They simultaneously all burst out laughing which released the tension. At least they were all on an equal footing with nothing to hide.
Ted announced that it was time for the last activity and he led them through the cold shower which killed off any remnant of passion, out of the sauna picking up their towels, past the changing room where all their gear was, following a sign marked Jacuzzi. Again they shed their towels and jumped in and once the bubbles flowed so the giggling began and they relaxed again. After a thoroughly enjoyable day they dressed, handed in their locker keys and passes and climbed into the car for the journey home.

* * *

Once there Lewis set up some cold drinks in the garden and they sat and chatted about the day's events until Ted said "If we’re cooking supper tonight, it's time we got started." At that Jack jumped up, asked their babysitters to give them a brief guide of the kitchen and then banished them upstairs or into the garden until supper was ready, probably in an hour's time, prisoners in their own home. Neither could deny being exhausted, although their tiredness was accompanied by that self-righteous feeling that comes after physical effort. So they slipped upstairs to Lewis' room, set the alarm clock, divested themselves of their sports clothes and lay on the bed dozing in each other's arms. The alarm did its work. They showered together and without bothering to dress again Ben made his way naked across to his wing, towel and dirty clothes in a linen bag, just as Jack came out of the twins' room before looking for their hosts in order to announce that dinner would be served in ten minutes. There was no embarrassment whatsoever. Admiration, yes, adoration, maybe, envy not in the slightest for Ben and Jack matched up very well in their physiques and Jack had the temerity to slap Ben on his bare bottom as he left to go downstairs again. While dressing he thought how lucky he was to share his affection with Lewis, but also realised that neither was he left entirely untouched by Jack. Phrases like 'the sort of son I would like to have' and the transparent 'I’d like to marry sister' ran through his mind and in conclusion he came to appreciate his brother's situation where he had openly fallen in love with two people at the same time. His eyes fell on his signet ring and he instantly reaffirmed to himself his commitment to Lewis. As a by the by it dawned on him that it was too easy to forget just how young the twins in fact were especially as he and Lewis had really accepted them as contemporaries.
When he went downstairs Lewis was already in the sitting room enjoying a glass of sherry. One had been poured for Ben. Within minutes Jack and Ted invited their hosts to take their places in the dining room and acting the part they held their chairs as they took their seats. If it had not been obvious before it became so today that Jack always attached himself to Ben while Ted attended on Lewis. It had been the twins' choice, but it certainly suited them. On the table already served were bowls of Mediterranean tomato soup complete with basil leaves. They must have raided their mother's larder while Ben and Lewis were upstairs. This was followed by poached salmon cutlets in a sauce accompanied by boiled new potatoes and a mixed salad.
"We've taken the liberty of opening a bottle of wine," said Jack as he filled the four glasses on the table with a German Mosel. To finish a fresh fruit salad and assorted cheeses were offered and from the variety compared with the previous day's shopping Lewis and Ben not only deduced that they had in fact raided the larder at home, but that Christina had connived before going away in the provision of ingredients and it would have been a great disappointment, had they refused the twins' offer of playing chef. And to boot they could not fault the quality of either the production or the presentation. Was there no end to these lads' gifts?
The evening had been most civilised and over coffee Ben and Lewis extolled Jack and Ted and expressed their gratitude for their efforts. Furthermore when they went to do the washing up they found that it had already been done.
"Nothing is too much trouble for you, sirs," they said in unison and with a bow, but despite the irony in the word 'sirs' it was a remark made with obvious genuine feeling.
Despite coffee, the exertions of the day finally overcame them and soon all four made their weary ways up to bed.

XXV

Since they had been living at Oddstones Marc, Elly and Seb would attend the parish church each Sunday and now Ben and Lewis were resident in the village they joined the extended family. They were admittedly surprised when Jack and Ted asked if they might join them and even more surprised when they got themselves up early, disappeared back home and returned wearing very smart dark suits. They looked so grown up and handsome. The villagers in general supported their church very well and in sufficient numbers to retain their own rector who had been at the church more years than many of the congregation could remember which led to the fear that when he finally retired they might well have to share whoever was available and 'whoever' would more than likely be of the modern tradition and, dare one say, happy-clappy or even worse a woman. The family preferred the early service for the rector with full support of his churchwardens had resisted calls to modernise that service and week upon week it would be read from the Book of Common Prayer.
The family always walked from home to the church unless the weather was particular inclement and their timing was such that the Oddstones group and the Nook contingent converged on the lychgate from opposite ends of the village at the same time. Self-indulgence led to a communal family hug and the twins were not to be left out. Had anyone been looking they would have noticed the particularly warm and tight embrace between them and Seb, but no one was looking. During the service the twins sandwiched Seb between them, both in their pew and when they went up to take communion. On the way out the rector enquired after Jack's and Ted's parents and they explained that they were away for the weekend, something about a second honeymoon to celebrate their wedding anniversary.
When the extended family was leaving, the first autumnal mist was lifting as the sun gained height and ever armed with their digital camera the twins asked for a group photograph which Elly readily volunteered to take so that she could avoid being in it. Eventually the party split up. From the gossiping a bystander might not be blamed for thinking they had been parted for months. With calls of "See you later" and another hug between Seb and the twins they made their separate ways home to breakfast.
At the Nook breakfast was a leisurely affair aided by the Sunday papers, but eventually Jack and Ted disappeared over to their house to download the camera as they wanted to take some prints along with them to Oddstones. Later they were to be seen in the garden practising their rugby passing and promptly at half past eleven they returned dressed in the regulation 501s ready for the walk to Oddstones. Admittedly they thought they were having their leg pulled, but had decided to play along. However, Lewis and Ben had changed into theirs and on their arrival they discovered that with one exception all the males had played the game, that exception being Tony whom no one had remembered to tell. (Exempt on grounds of age, everyone joked.) Margaret, Jessica and Adam were also there by now. The only family missing were Marc's, Jessica's and Ben's parents who found the journey too much for just one day, especially on a bank holiday weekend, and had declined the invitation.
The temperature had risen with the sun and the three ladies had worked hard to lay lunch al fresco in a shaded part of the garden. Marc and Seb busied themselves ensuring that everyone was fully supplied with liquid refreshment. After the housewarming at the Nook Ted and Jack were no strangers and everyone went out of their way to ensure they were fully integrated and entertained to the point where they were successfully separated without the need for a surgical operation, but when lunch was served they closed in from opposite ends of the garden to ensure that at table they had Seb sitting between them and from his face you could see that Seb was thoroughly relishing their company. The photographs had been duly produced to general approval, but Jack was still carefully guarding another envelope under the table. Conversation was lively over the traditional roast, pork on this occasion, and the meal easily lasted two hours before the family rose from table. Another family tradition, the menfolk cleared away and loaded and unloaded the dishwasher. This now included Lewis of course - privileges had their corresponding duties - but not the twins who were still considered guests. Strangely, though, after carrying dirty crockery and cutlery through to the kitchen from the garden Seb was nowhere to be seen and that was unlike him. Still they had more than enough to help with the tendency to get in each other's way. After that it was relaxation in the garden for the men or the sitting room for the women who could discuss babies to their hearts' content, and an after-dinner nap was also in order.
Five o'clock and time for tea. The ladies dutifully got up to enquire after the wishes of their menfolk. Elly returned to the garden to ask Lewis if he had seen Jack and Ted and only then did he realise he hadn't seen or heard them all afternoon. He went inside to ask Ben and they duly made their way to the kitchen to report when they heard an almighty racket on the stairs as three bodies bounced their way down ignoring the odd step and chatting nineteen to the dozen. It was the twins and Seb. Each of their faces had the look of the cat who'd got the cream and Jack was no longer guarding that envelope. Ben's sharp mind immediately flashed back to the evening of Marc's and Elly's wedding day feeding him the idea that the twins had finally succeeded where he had failed. Not that it mattered to him now and they had certainly made no secret of working hard for it. Still he mustn't jump to conclusions.
Tea was served on the patio and everyone sat around and chatted until Jack asked if he could take some more snaps to finish the film off - not bad for a digital camera! Without further ado he organised everyone into various groups and clicked away or organised someone else to while he joined this group or that. When the tea things were cleared away it signalled a natural end to the lunch party and two by two everyone took their leave. Ben, Lewis, Jack and Ted were the last, mainly as the twins were still talking to Seb. As they parted the passion of the hug had not diminished from the morning after church and Ben smiled to himself. He had to confess to some professional jealousy. On the way home he asked the twins whether they had enjoyed themselves. They had.
"Where did you disappear to this afternoon?"
"Oh. we were up in Seb's apartment."
He knew he would get no further than that. There was no use trying. But he wasn't deflected from his theory either when five minutes later Ted casually said "Seb might be able to fix us up with his friend from your modelling agency." They arrived home and spent the rest of the evening in a heated game of Scrabble until bedtime.

XXVI

The following day spent at Duxford turned out to be most entertaining for our four young men. The Battle of Britain flight had managed to muster all the few remaining airworthy Spitfires and Hurricanes which formed up in a flypast. Even when there was no flying the fringe entertainments kept them occupied. The worst aspect of the excursion was the traffic in the evening and it was eight o'clock before they finally arrived back at the Nook.
Cooking that evening was out of the question, so they quickly showered and changed and walked to the village inn for dinner. The sky glowed in the west for the evenings were fast drawing in. They all felt that incandescent warmth that comes after a day in the sun. Conversation was subdued, even from the twins, for no other reason than that the weekend had scarcely been restful and that its exertions were catching up on them. Over dinner Ben bought them each a beer. He knew from experience it would get them talking and he wasn't wrong.
"How do you get on with Seb?" he blandly asked in his ingenuous way.
"Great," they replied together.
"It's odd because he acts like he's our big brother," said Ted. "He tells us funny stories and over the years he's been there, seen it, done it and he feeds in advice without being pushy."
"What were you talking about for so long yesterday afternoon? We wondered where you'd got to." "Oh, this and that. He's got a such fund of stories."
"And the people he's met through his work."
"We gave him some of our photos because of the possibility of doing some modelling like you, Ben."
"He also showed us his collection of jockstraps," said Jack warming to his subject, "and he let us try some on." Lewis and Ben gave each other a knowing look.
"We'll let you see some pictures," continued Ted.
"There's one of me in David Beckham's," said Jack.
"And one of me in Michael Owen's," added Ted.
"How did he get hold of those?" asked Lewis.
"He's never mentioned them to us," said Ben.
"There was a charity auction advertised on the internet a couple of years ago of famous personalities' clothes and kit. Mainly shirts, shorts, suits, dresses, hats, tracksuits, even trainers and boots and through friends he talked them into thinking there would be little call for jockstraps and persuaded them to come to a private arrangement."
"He's got one of Ian Botham's."
"And Linford Christie's, but even we couldn't do justice to it," said Ted.
"It was much too big round the waist," Jack quickly added, but with little chance of convincing anyone.
"Anyway, that apart, we've decided to invite him to become our unofficial godfather," said Jack. "We're not quite sure how Mum and Dad are going to take it, but we'll work on that."
"You see, our real godfather died when we were about five."
"He was a conjuror and did magic tricks for us."
"And we felt we'd missed out."
"It means he can be a friend of the family like you two are now." The twins were probably working on their parents over that, as well. Lewis and Ben were getting used to the way one twin would start a sentence and the other would finish it and didn't find it so bewildering now. In fact they'd noticed how they'd begun doing it themselves since they'd been living together.
They went on to discuss many of the other things they had done and could not express their gratitude sufficiently. On the other hand Lewis and Ben praised them for the way they had joined in and made themselves so handy about the house. They had enjoyed their company and would be pleased to babysit for them again should the opportunity arise. Lewis and Ben were dying to discuss the sexual overtones of the weekend, fully aware of the effect the twins had had on them, but could not bring themselves to do so for fear of seeming to encourage them. But in truth while they had responded undeniably positively to the twins' attractiveness and tarting they could honestly say they had not initiated anything despite the many opportunities and temptations.
It was not long after they had finished their meal that they made their way home through the lanes so completely dark that they wished they had brought torches. Once indoors Lewis asked Jack and Ted whether as a special treat and because they had been so responsible they would like to taste one of his available in Scotland only malt whiskies. Again the twins' enterprise won through and he poured them each a measured tot into a glass while pouring an unmeasured one for Ben and himself with the advice to drink just one small sip at a time and savour it before swallowing. In both the first sip caused coughing and spluttering, but the second was savoured and eventually appreciated. However, the overall effect after they had finished was that they both went very red in the face and became giggly as they sprawled over the settee. It was obviously time for bed. Our heroes first took Ted and Jack into the kitchen and insisted they drank a large glass of water, then accompanied them upstairs to their room just to make sure they were safe. They left a tray with two glasses and a large carafe of water on the bedside table and told them if they felt thirsty in the night to drink some water. There is no implication that they were drunk. They were not, just giggly, but our lads didn't want to take chances with other people's property. Jack and Ted assured Ben and Lewis that were perfectly all right and just wanted to sleep. They wished them good night at which Jack took Ben's hand and stroking his palm with his forefinger drew him towards him, put his arms round his waist, his hands on his buttocks and kissed him good night on the lips. They lingered for a few seconds feeling the contours of each other’s body before Jack released him, climbed onto the bed without undressing and immediately fell into a deep sleep.
"He's okay," assured Ted. "He always does this. Passes out on a barmaid's breath. He'll wake up after an hour and I'll help him to get undressed," he said with a knowing smile as he took his shoes off for him. Our lads wished Ted good night, told him not to worry about calling them if he needed to and disappeared downstairs.
"Tomorrow's the 1 September," said Ben once they were seated in the sitting room again. "One week until school begins."
"We'd better get down to some work, I suppose," Lewis replied.
"Still, time for bed, said Zebedee," or rather Ben and they cleared away the glasses, climbed the stairs, undressed and got into bed.
"Good night, Ben," said Lewis.
"Just a moment. I'm afraid Jack started something that's got to be finished," and Ben took Lewis in his arms and gave him a full, hot-blooded good night kiss.

* * *

"Good morning, everyone," they cheerfully chorused. The twins were down to breakfast the following morning at seven thirty sharp, carrying their bed linen and towels which they put into the washing machine. Ben and Lewis were just putting the final touches to the Daily Telegraph crossword.
"How did you sleep, Jack?"
"Like a log."
"Breakfast?"
"Yes please, I’m starving."
"Bacon, egg, fried bread, mushrooms, baked beans and sausage okay?"
"I could murder them," came the reply as Jack poured himself a bowl of muesli.
"It's all right," said Ted. "I've told him. He can't remember a thing."
"All I can remember is being downstairs and then the next was I woke up about midnight frozen stiff. Did I really kiss you, Ben?"
"That's right. You did, but I wouldn’t call it frozen stiff."
"Damn shame I can't remember. Must catch you another time," and by now he was heartily tucking into his full fry.
"Obviously no harm done," added Lewis.
Breakfast over the twins collected their things together and with hearty thanks they disappeared across to their own house. They had a morning of fitness, rugby practice and photo processing on the computer ahead of them. By eleven the Mercedes was parked in the drive and within the hour Phil and Christina were ringing the front door bell, carrying a large old-fashioned picnic hamper between them. They were immediately invited in and offered tea or coffee.
"The boys have told us all about their weekend with you," said Phil.
"We couldn't stop them talking. We haven't been able say anything about ours they were so excited," continued Christina. They lifted the hamper onto the table. Sellotaped to it was a card in an envelope.
"We've brought you this to say thank you," said Phil.
"The boys must have eaten you out of house and home," Christina went on. "I don't know where they put it all and there's not an ounce of fat on them."
"I've noticed," thought Ben.
"You didn't have to," said Lewis. "It's been great fun and they certainly kept our family entertained on Sunday."
"I'll drink to that," said Ben and after last night immediately wished he hadn't.
"In the envelope there's some cash to cover the boys' expenses. If it's not enough, don't hesitate to say so." Ben and Lewis peered into the hamper and were taken aback at what was there. It was all kinds of non-perishable food and drink. It would take them a month on holiday to get through that. They left the envelope for the moment, but expressed their gratitude as Phil and Christina made their excuses.
"All the unpacking and washing to do and a bucket of cold water to throw over the boys to calm them down. I don't know where they get all their energy from. Yes, we had a super weekend and it's made it even better to know that Jack and Ted were in such good hands." After the Battys had been shown out, Ben and Lewis undid the envelope. They gasped. The sum inside was far in excess of what they had spent.

XXVII

In September school began and both Ben and Lewis faced a gruelling first term. For them life had finally become serious with the ensuing stresses and tests on their relationship. However, facing the trials of probationary teachers they were strengthened by their mutual support and comfort. Together they were able to ensure that there was life beyond school, even if during term time that was only on a Sunday. Lewis did have two full days at the weekend, but the U15 rugby team would take up Ben's Saturdays. At least he could stay in bed longer unless it was a morning away match, but morning matches on the other hand gave him a free afternoon.
With their various common interests, not least of which was their shared sexuality, Lewis' and Ben's friendship with the Batty boys inevitably developed. To begin with there was the school run. Ben and Lewis would take turns driving to and from school, unless there was something special to detain them such as staff meetings or parents' evenings, and it would have been churlish not to take their nextdoor neighbours with them. The boys livened up the journeys with their chatter in the back seat. In fact our couple often wondered whether they rehearsed the comedy routines at home on the evening before. Despite the temptations the twins never compromised their professional relationship with Ben although they had plenty of opportunity. If they were in school uniform it was always 'sir' and 'Ben and Lewis' in casual clothes. Ben not only had them in his rugby squad, but discovered they were members of his fourth form maths set, as well. The potential problem with the U15 rugby XV did not really evolve. The twins could prove their superiority as halfbacks to their fellow pupils with such little difficulty that there was no visible or audible dissent. By then they were already very well accepted by their peer group and obviously well liked. Ben was so sure of their ability that he let the decision, publicly at least, be made by his deputy. Jack and Ted not only strengthened the XV by their own contribution, but released talent that increased competition for places elsewhere in the team. What had been a mediocre season as U14s turned out to be the most successful school U15s in the memory of any of the pupils. The acid test came when Ben heard that Buckton College was planning a tour in the area and he used his contacts to arrange an extra fixture. The match was a high-scoring success of entertaining rugby and when the whistle finally blew for no side honour was satisfied with a draw.
But we have gone off at a tangent. It is family and village life we should be discussing at this point. First among the September social rounds was the Battys' housewarming party which took the form of a barbecue organised by the local butcher. All of Ben's family had been invited, but when it came down to it only Seb, Marc and Elly besides him and Lewis were able to attend and it was to their great surprise when the announcement was made that Seb was to become Jack's and Ted's new godfather. Ben and Lewis had given it no more heed since that pub dinner after Duxford and Seb had certainly kept quiet about it. They were able to meet the aunt with the broken leg whose accident had indirectly given them such an entertaining and pleasurable bank holiday and it came out in conversation that all the parties involved would be delighted for Lewis and Ben to 'babysit' for the twins again, should the occasion arise, and the occasion certainly was going to arise if Jack and Ted had anything to do with it.
As autumn progressed the days were fast closing in and Ben and Lewis realised that they hadn't organised anything for half term. They felt a need to get away to find some sun, but not only that. They were both exhausted and had been so fully committed to making a success of their school life that they had neglected not only house and garden, but more particularly each other. If they stopped at the Nook, they knew they would would fiddle and waste the break. On the Friday in the week before half term they sat down together after dinner and formed a plan of action. Firstly they would ask their cleaner to double her hours over half term. The weekend would be spent tidying the garden, enlisting the twins' aid since they would willingly cut the grass provided they could use the sit-on motor mower. Ben and Lewis would do the rest. Then they trawled through the teletext for last minute holidays. Not wanting to repeat Mykonos just yet they found a slot for Tenerife, leave Saturday and return the following Saturday, and a phone call secured it. It was such a bargain that they did not worry over much about the accommodation as long as they could build on the physical side of their relationship. The five Ss - siesta, swimming, supper and sleep - that was what they were after, especially getting away from the chores of their everyday existence and being waited on.
In the extended family there were also developments. Marc's, Jessica's and Ben's parents had finally taken the decision to sell up in the west country and to come and live in Cambridgeshire. They had found a bungalow in the country on the other side of the city near to Jessica and Adam. Both Ben and Lewis felt some relief for they did not really want to be overshadowed while they were building as it were their lifetime partnership together. The parents were safely settled in for Christmas. However, Christmas required some planning which took place over a family Sunday lunch. There were practical considerations. The parents' bungalow was patently too small to take them all. Both Jessica and Elly were growing large with child, Elly especially, and she was petite under normal circumstances, and so it would not be fair to lumber them with the arrangements. Therefore it was Ben and Lewis to the rescue as they readily volunteered to host Christmas Day for the family if others would provide any accommodation required. However, it did not come to that for in the end for it was Tony and Margaret who insisted that everyone should come to them. Lewis and Ben did admittedly utter a sigh of relief.
When Christmas finally arrived they were more that ready for it and in the end it panned out rather well. At the Mythe School the end of term celebrations included the rugby dinner, the school play and the carol service. At least Lewis could accompany Ben to the last two and he was heartened by the number of boys who remembered him from TP. The week before Christmas saw the usual panic with shopping, writing cards and the general preparations such as decorating the house.
The holiday was a period of rest and recuperation for our two young men, punctuated with the usual round of social events with the family and of course with their neighbours, and by the way, after negotiation neither had found any necessity to mark the boundary between their properties by any other means than those the surveyors had used in the summer. The openness of their gardens was emblematical of the openness between the two (for want of a better word) families.
On Christmas Eve along with the Batty family Ben and Lewis stepped through a light sprinkling of snow to Oddstones for drinks and then on to church for midnight mass, Seb under the constant supervision of his new found godsons. After church the party split to return to their own homes. Once indoors Ben and Lewis exchanged gifts, a pair of cufflinks made from two sovereigns for Lewis and an exercise bike for Ben. They thanked each other under a sprig of mistletoe in the traditional way. Lewis poured two glasses of exclusive malt whisky which they drank in front of the television watching the remnants of a Will Hay film before returning to the mistletoe as a prelude to retiring to bed.
After the late night came the late morning. It was nine o'clock when Ben woke. As Lewis was still slumbering, he put on a pair of shorts and went and made tea. It was strange. He was proud of his body and knew it was in superb condition. He had no compunction whatever in stripping off all his clothes and yet he would feel physically uncomfortable if he walked round the house naked. He could never understand the culture of nudists. He brought the tea up to the bedroom and in the manner of the tale of Sleeping Beauty the prince gently woke his loved one and presented him with a cup of tea. Lewis smiled sleepily and looked at his watch. The family space wagon would pick them up at eleven o'clock. They had another hour before they had to get up. Ben peeled off his shorts, climbed back into bed and warmed himself against Lewis' naked body.
By eleven they were up, showered and smartly dressed, standing by the front door in anticipation each armed with two large carrier bags of Christmas presents duly packed and labelled with the combined love of Ben and Lewis.
A thoroughly happy day was spent with all the family at Tony and Margaret's. This would be the last Christmas with only two generations. Elly and Jessica were pampered to the last degree, especially by their respective mothers. Christmas was still celebrated traditionally. This year the main fare was goose, an advantage of living in the country. Lunch lasted until the Queen's speech and afterwards the presents were distributed and opened. The menfolk were finally allowed to take their afternoon nap while the womenfolk could talk of babies. The evening was time for silly games and drinks except for the duty drivers. Towards midnight the party broke up and Lewis and Ben climbed into the space wagon with the Oddstones contingent for the journey home. Our two young men chilled out for an hour until they finally decided to go to bed, and after calling by the mistletoe their day finished in the same way as it began.
However, it was Boxing Day that was to provide the surprise treat and even Lewis was taken aback. They were invited nextdoor to the Battys' for lunch and Lewis and Ben dutifully turned up at twelve. It was Boxing Day in the true sense since the six gathered together would later exchange their Christmas boxes. After a chat over sherry Phil and Christina suggested that while they were making the last preparations for lunch Jack and Ted might like to take Ben and Lewis to their den and show them their Christmas presents. No sooner said than done. The twins had decorated their room for the festive season and while our young men were recovering from the surprise Jack skilfully manœuvred Ben, and Ted likewise Lewis, under the two prominent sprigs of mistletoe and before they knew what was happening the twins wrapped their arms around them and took full advantage of the yuletide tradition by giving each a long and passionate kiss. The two pairs of bodies held such a tight embrace that all four could feel the passion aroused in themselves and their partner.
When they finally split, Jack looked Ben in the eyes and said "Do you remember that last morning at your place over the bank holiday in the summer? I said I would catch you another time? Consider yourself caught." Meanwhile Lewis was still making sure that he was giving as good as he got. Any thoughts of professionalism had long gone out of the window. The flirting had to stop when Christina's voice was heard calling up the stairs that it was time for lunch.
However pleasurable the rest of the day was, it was an anticlimax compared with the aperitif all four had just enjoyed. Each was astonished as to where the last half hour had gone. Ben had some professional qualms, but they were soon dismissed by the satisfaction of the moment. He was relieved that he had taken his pleasure with Lewis that morning or he could have been on edge for the rest of the day. Without the professional relationship Lewis had thoroughly exploited the whole affair content in the fact he had neither instigated it nor been untrue to his lover. By the time the four had washed their hands for lunch all feeling of tightness, if not dampness, had vanished from their trousers. Lunch extended into tea and further into the evening. Finally they got round to the exchange of gifts and Ben and Lewis were equally surprised as they were delighted to receive from the Batty family, signed by each member, a year's premier membership to the local leisure centre and country club they had visited in the summer. Each membership card was placed inside a folder with a picture of the relevant twin posing at a sporting activity.
New Year it was Lewis' and Ben's turn to host the celebrations at the Nook. It was almost a repeat version of house-warming with the full family and the Battys. Our two lads organised a buffet supper, which made the arrangements easier, and organised various entertainments which the two sisters-in-law had to sit out. However, they had brought their knitting. The twins behaved themselves exceptionally well and even at midnight followed Lewis' and Ben's restrained example in confining themselves to hugs with the one exception of their godfather. It was two o'clock before the party finally broke up and after all their hard work in entertaining Ben and Lewis could retire, only to fall asleep immediately. Still, they made up for that in the morning as they had the whole day before them and to themselves.

XXVIII

January brought the first piece of excitement of the New Year to the extended family when without any complications Elly gave birth to her and Marc's twin baby boys, and none outside the family took greater interest in them than Jack and Ted, especially as in this case the new born were identical twins. In due time they were christened Thomas and Guy in deference to Marc's great schoolfriend and to the man who had indirectly contributed, perhaps unwittingly, to the happiness and support of so many of the younger members of the family. Boosted by their success Marc and Elly produced Sebastian some seventeen months later who was christened in honour of his uncle. Not to be outdone Jessica brought Benjamin into the world two months after the arrival of the twins and with Adam's further assistance gave birth to Elizabeth in the same month as Sebastian was born. With a new generation the centre of gravity of the extended family altered. Now for years to come all eyes were on the new arrivals with interest in their future development.
At a family Sunday lunch to celebrate the birth of the twins the company gathered was reminiscing and because of the time of year the topic of conversation naturally alighted on the skiing holidays in Austria. "Why don't you men take one again this year," suggested Elly.
"I can't leave you and the twins so soon," replied Marc.
"Why not?" chorused the two grandmamas in unison. "That would give us a chance to come and give a hand without interfering." The two grandfathers looked at one another trying not to laugh. It was just the opportunity both had been looking for and the conversation had all the signs of devious feminine preplanning. The three bachelors said "We’re up for it."
"Count us out," piped up Adam.
"We've made other plans for the next few weeks," added a radiant Jessica.
"What do you think, Marc?"
"I'll discuss it with Elly when there's no pressure, but why don't you all go ahead anyway?" Marc was on a term out, partly leave for research, partly paternity leave, so he could not argue that he was unable get the time off. Seb was a free agent and he had some time owing to him. Ben and Lewis had half term. "We're in for a bit of taxi-driving," said the grandfathers. "Anyway, you youngsters won't want us holding you back."
"You know what?" piped up Seb. "I think it's about time I treated my godsons. Leave the bookings to me and I'll see what I can do for a party of six." Seb knew that if his sister and mother were in favour Marc virtually had his case packed. "Maurach?" he continued.
"Is there anywhere else?" said Marc whose heartstrings had been plucked by nostalgia.
"So you're coming?" said Ben.
"Wait a moment. Elly, shall we go and make some tea?" He was interested. It was conference time.
Marc and Elly disappeared to the kitchen. Seb disappeared upstairs. Meanwhile the rest of the family played Pass the Parcel with Thomas and Guy in a communal hugging session until Margaret decided it was time for a nappy change which gave the two grandmamas an excuse to go and add their two pennyworth in the kitchen. Even at this early age nappy change showed that the twins were truly their father's sons. As the grandfather clock struck five, tea was wheeled in on a trolley. Seb reappeared on cue. Decisions had been made. It was all systems go. Marc was coming and the Batty boys would be entrusted to the tender loving care of their godfather for a week. Twenty-four hours later Seb had done the biz and flights, transfers, hotel and ski hire had been fixed up.
The journey to school in the car next morning was interesting, to say the least.
"I hear you’re coming skiing with us at half term," the twins said to Lewis and Ben. They smiled wryly as they thought it was the other way round.
"Yes."
"Seb said he wanted to treat us as we were now his godsons," said Ted.
"And we're going to give him treat," added Jack.
"We've got a little surprise up our sleeves."
"What's that?" asked Ben naïvely.
"If we told you it wouldn't be a surprise any longer," answered Ted.
"But he'll enjoy it. We'll make sure of that," continued Jack.
"It's something all three of us have wanted to do for a long time." As the car disgorged its contents Ben and Lewis thought no more about it and nor should they.
Half term was late that February which meant it should be that much warmer on the slopes as the sun finally began to gain some height. Although it had been some years since the last family trip to Maurach for skiing the routine had hardly changed. Marc and Ben's father took the six to Luton in the family space wagon for seven o'clock on the Saturday. Flight to Munich, coach over the frontier to Maurach, arrival late afternoon, get kitted out, dinner, crash out after a long day, Sunday morning revision skiing lessons. Our six had elected to be housed in the annexe not only for sentimental reasons, but also for the extra facilities such as the swimming pool, sauna and fitness room. Marc and Seb stayed in their usual room, the one where as sixteen and fourteen year olds and after six months of wooing and longing, not to mention manipulation, they had finally consummated their relationship. A year later they had connived so that Adam and Jessica had a couple of hours alone together in that room and in heterosexual form they followed their older brothers' example and a dozen or so years later both relationships were as strong as ever.
Seb had also organised the weather. Fresh snow had fallen just before their arrival and as was usual for early spring in the Alps the sun shone warmly and the locals were already sporting that winter suntan. Marc and Seb were concerned about the twins. They had not skied before and naturally had to go into the beginners' class, but being the natural sportsmen they were and along with their honed fitness they easily picked up the skills they were taught in the morning and were anxious to exploit them in their free time in the afternoon under the expert tuition of the neighbour with the qualification in PE. Ben had never viewed himself as a Schilehrer before, but his combination of training and years of experience on the slopes made sure that the youngsters progressed speedily and by midweek they were equal to any task the others were attempting. All four would ensure that Jack and Ted had a good time in the evening and took full advantage of the après-ski activities. They were not given time to get bored and in any case they were entrepreneurial by nature. Since being at the Mythe School they had started German and with two graduates in German in the party and Ben having gone through the Buckton College system it was poor Lewis who was left out in the cold linguistically. Of the adults he was also the least experienced skier. He had once been on a school trip to the Highlands. So he was not a complete beginner. To assuage his conscience, since he was supposed to on study leave, Marc had arranged to spend the Wednesday and Thursday with a German colleague at Munich university. When the twins heard this their eyes lit up, unnoticed by the others, for although they would miss Marc's company it made their plans for Seb's surprise that much simpler. Only Lewis and Ben had heard anything about it and that was in the car on the way to school a few weeks back and since that day they had given it no more thought. So Wednesday was the appointed day. It was really too easy and unwittingly Ben and Lewis fell in with their plans.
They had already expressed the wish to spend a little time by themselves. The day's skiing had gone like all the other days. The five skied down to the hotel from the top station, but instead of the customary swim Lewis and Ben decided for once they would go off for Kaffee und Kuchen followed by shopping and catch up with Seb and the twins at dinner. This left the way free for the twins for they knew Seb well enough for him not to go off on his own and leave them behind. That would have been irresponsible even if he had wanted to. So they took their customary swim and finished off in the sauna. That relaxed all three and put them in the right mood.
Afterwards they went and changed for the evening. As arranged they had dinner together and spent the time chatting in the hotel bar until the twins said they were tired and Ben suggested that an early night was in order. All five made their way back to the annexe and said good night before going off to their rooms. As they had the annexe to themselves, once they were in they locked the front door and had no need to worry about the outside world. Lewis and Ben were so occupied with one another that half an hour later they did not hear the twins' door open as, clad only in their dressing gowns, they padded their way along the corridor to Seb's room. A light tap on his door and they went in without waiting for an answer. Seb was reading in bed in his normal night attire, namely his birthday suit. Jack and Ted greeted him cheerily and Seb was overjoyed, if taken aback, to see them. They hung their dressing gowns on the peg behind the door, walked across the room to either side of the double bed and climbed under the duvet. When Ben went to wake the twins in the morning they were not in their room. He just heard the telltale giggles from Seb's room and immediately knew that not only were they up and about, but they had also given Seb his treat. What he didn't know was that now Plan A had been executed Jack and Ted would be working on Plan B, an even greater challenge, and that Plan B involved him and Lewis. However, that would not be for some time yet.
The mood during Thursday's skiing was light and frivolous. Everyone knew why, but no one was anxious to talk about it, least of all Seb. Marc would return from Munich in time for dinner, so Ben and Lewis suggested all six should go out for a drink afterwards, but with one view to loosen tongues. To start with Lewis stood everyone a beer over dinner to start the ball rolling, but kept off the taboo subject. Anyway, Marc's academic adventures in Munich were the main topic, even if it left everyone but Seb cold. He had managed to see some Thomas Mann archive material which would have been useful to him when he was writing his thesis. However, he accepted philosophically that one never ceased learning and that that material alone had made the whole stay worthwhile. Marc asked if he could be excused from going out for a drink. He was knackered from the travelling and had a few things to catch up with and he was determined to enjoy the last day of skiing.
The five wrapped themselves up warm, for it was a frosty moonlit night, and disappeared off to the Goldener Apostel. For Seb this was a sentimental journey, but he wasn't letting on. Well, not yet. They settled down at a quiet table. Only Seb knew that it was the table. He ordered the beers and as planned the conversation got going.
It was Ben whose curiosity got the better of him and he blurted out with "You lot were making enough noise last night." He was trying his luck. He had been too involved in his own love life to pay any attention, but they weren't to know that.
"Why? Was Lewis stopping you from getting to sleep?" came the rejoinder from Seb.
"Go on. We know about it. You may as well spill the beans."
"Well, there's nothing to tell. I was quite happily reading in bed when there was a tap at the door. I had a visit. It went on a bit."
"You can say that again," said Ben.
"Till the morning," said Lewis. Seb continued quite unabashed.
"The visit was from two thoroughly and irresistibly hot hunks…" Jack and Ted giggled. "“…and I don't think what happened after that was much different from what was happening in your room." Seb ended defiantly and with a self-satisfied smile complete with the twinkle in his eyes. Jack and Ted were looking at one another, nudging each other, obviously proud of their efforts and enjoying the moment, and still giggling uncontrollably.
"Your turn will come," they said to Ben and Lewis with tears of mirth rolling down their cheeks as some kind of consolation which they took as simply a throwaway remark.
Ben was just about to order some more beers when the door opened and who should come in but Marc.
"I thought I might find you here. Has Seb told you what this pub means to us?" The beers arrived. "Shall we tell them, Seb?" and the story of their first declaration of love after their first night spent together in the same bed was passed on to the next generation.
"And it was at this very table," concluded Seb.
"And am I to gather that you two lads had your wicked way with my boyfriend last night while I was away?" The twins gasped.
"How did you know?"
"Well, it doesn't take a Sherlock Holmes to know that. Firstly, Seb and I gave up using Lynx some years ago. Secondly, there are no secrets between us and thirdly you don't often see four dressing gowns hung behind the door of a room for two."
"You don't mind?" asked Jack suddenly becoming serious.
"No, why? We’ve always been brought up to share and I hope you had as good a time with him as I do. I'm looking forward to hearing all the details when we get back. It's got me going already."
There was a natural pause and Marc looked at his watch. They paid up and took their leave.
"We've got a strenuous day tomorrow - Langlauf - cross-country." Outside it was quiet, so quiet that Seb and Marc walked up the road to the hotel with their arms round each other's waist. Following suit Jack took Ben and Ted took Lewis. Despite the cold Ben felt his trousers tighten. On reaching the annexe they went up to their rooms, but all had a communal hug and kissed each other good night.
Although new for the twins and Lewis Friday was exactly what the other three had come to expect, but no less enjoyable for that. A thoroughly good time was had as they skied to areas not touched before. In the evening the presentations and a particular fuss was made of the twins for having made the most progress as beginners. After the party the packing and early to bed for the early start in the morning.

XXIX

At Luton they were met by Tony with the family space wagon for the journey back to Cambridge. The twins and Lewis and Ben were the first to be dropped off. The Batty family reunion clearly showed they had all missed each other over the week, but Christina Batty, appreciating how tiring the long journey must have been, insisted that once they had unpacked Ben and Lewis were to join them for a hot meal, in the kitchen, no ceremony, and they could go as soon or as late as they wished. Much of the conversation over supper was about the week. The twins could announce that while they were away not only had they secured their places in the County rugby XV, but they had been invited for an England schoolboy trial. This news brought congratulations all round, not only for the boys, but also for their rugby master who modestly denied any responsibility whatsoever. All four had Sunday to get ready for school, which at the Nook meant a battle with the washing machine, tumbler dryer and iron. Ben and Lewis joined the family and the Battys for church and were invited round to Oddstones for lunch. That way they were spared the Sainsbury's run and cooking
When they returned home late Sunday afternoon they finally had time to relax. Ben made some tea and they sat on the sofa in each other's arms simply pleased to be by themselves at last. Now they could talk and Ben broached the one topic that had been taxing him over the last few days.
"What did you think about Jack and Ted spending the night together with Seb when Marc was in Munich?"
"Is that the green-eyed monster rearing its ugly head?"
"I've got to say I was envious, not jealous, but envious certainly."
"You see, it had to come and I suppose there couldn't have been a better opportunity. It was inevitable and when you think about it, I'm surprised it hadn't happened before."
"I must admit I thought it had, but I was clearly wrong there, and I'm amazed how calmly Marc took it."
"Since he's been married to Elly, Seb's really been a free agent. If I understand the situation correctly, he didn't encourage them. They made the decision and it wouldn't surprise me if they've made a similar decision about us."
"What do you mean?" asked Ben naïvely, but obviously curious. He would always rely on the fact that Lewis was more experienced in these matters.
"Think back to last Thursday when we were going back to the hotel from the pub."
"You mean when the twins did split up and they walked us up the road with their arms round our waists."
"Yes. What did you say to me afterwards?"
"What? About experiencing that tightness in the trouser department again?"
"Yes."
"But you know me. It doesn't take much to work me up."
"I know," giggled Lewis "and they're only too well aware of it as well. But remember they always split up the same way. Think of the tennis, for instance, and let's face it. You fancy Jack - that's obvious from your body language - and I prefer Ted…"
"Fancy Ted!"
"Okay, fancy Ted, and they know it and what's more they fancy us in the same way. I tell you, it'll only be a matter of time until they try it on with us and don't tell me you’ll say no. I know I certainly won't and providing they started it, I’m not deceiving you and you're getting your fair share as well, I won't have any conscience."
"You mean, you wouldn't object if I gave in as well?"
"Look, we're a team, Ben. They're a team. It would just be the teams working in a different way, but we'd still be teams. So the answer's no and I think our relationship would gain from the experience. Anyway, I'm suffering the same frustration as you."
"I've got to admit I'd love to give it go," concluded Ben wistfully, "even if it's only to get it out of my system." He gave Lewis a long intimate kiss and they disappeared upstairs for a quiet hour together before getting on with the chores.
The Monday brought school and on the return journey Lewis could hardly contain his excitement, but had to until they had deposited the Batty boys. He had received a letter from the Mythe School, sent to him at the comp, with the details of a chemistry post and an invitation to apply.
"So they didn't just say it to make me feel good," he said to Ben. The closing date was the end of the week. From the application it was clear that his address was the same as Ben's, but no questions were asked and after interview he was offered the post which he duly accepted. Jack and Ted continued to blossom at the Mythe, certainly in their sport, but also and importantly in their academic work. They did represent the county at rugby, something which brought Ben even closer to the Batty family. Indeed they attended their England schoolboy trial and were on tenterhooks to see whether they would finally gain a cap.
So without their noticing, a year, an important year for our two heroes, was quickly elapsing. The summer term was blissful and relaxed. The twins from their reputation for rugby were siphoned off as 'natural sportsmen' into the cricket squad. Ben had both his fourth and fifth form taking public exams, not to mention the sixths. Ted had taken his and passed with flying colours. Jack had not as he was carrying on with maths in September and so came their first divergence with him taking sciences at A-level and Ted planning and an arts course.
The half term holiday started as usual on the Friday and on the way into school in the morning the twins asked if Ben minded bringing back a friend in the car as he was stopping with them during the weekend for a sleep-over. If it was any trouble their father would collect all three after school. Of course, it wasn't any trouble and Ben and Lewis thought no more about the conversation. Only, on recollection, the twins had never invited any friends home before, nor had they gone off to stay with other boys. One needed to look no farther than their distinctive lifestyle to realise why. At four o'clock Ben's heart leapt to discover who it was. He had not given it any more thought during the day and there was no reason why he should have. The lad who was waiting with Jack and Ted was none other than Paul, his former rugby captain. It was only in retrospect some years later that Ben realised that his choice of rugby captain would not only fall on one of the outstanding members of the team - that went without saying since for one thing he had to be able to hold his place against any competition - but to a man they had all been particularly rugged types or more precisely good-looking youths who had at first subconsciously, but later more deliberately taken his fancy with a combination of character, sense of humour and physical attraction. So as the three loaded their kit into the boot of his car he could not help but admire their taste in friends and hope he might see something of Paul around home over the weekend and even said as much on the journey home.
Ben motored off to pick up Lewis and even he could not hide his obvious interest when he saw the 'stranger' in the car. The 'stranger' in fact needed no introduction as Paul and Lewis recognised each other immediately from TP. Half an hour later they were depositing their passengers outside the Nook and as Christina Batty came out of the neighbouring house to greet the guest she mentioned to Lewis and Ben that they would be welcome to join them for the barbecue they were having on Saturday evening. Ben was not a great fan of barbecues. They were a great recipe for ruining good food as well as a ready way of picking up campylobacter, as they had been taught in their health education lectures while at college. Anyway his libido soon overcame all the logical objections and Lewis needed no persuading anyway. Over that weekend Ben spent an inordinate amount of time seated at his desk in his study as the window gave a panoramic view over the gardens of both houses.
On the evening of the barbecue both Ben and Lewis entertained Paul. On casually enquiring about the intentions behind the weekend sleep-over Ben was quietly told by the twins that they would give him the lowdown later at which, driven on by curiosity, Lewis' and Ben's teamwork sprang into action. Chatting away Lewis led Ted and Paul up the garden path while Jack, who was visibly and undeniably keen to spill the beans, metaphorically, not those being served with the sausages, walked Ben over to the gazebo.
"It all started after games earlier this week. We were drying off in the changing room after our showers and there's Paul standing stark naked on a bench shouting 'Who’s going to give me a BJ?' Of course there were the usual shouts of abuse, but Ted turned to me and said 'Now there's an invitation we couldn't possible refuse.' For obvious reasons we didn't say much then. As you know, we keep a pretty low profile at school as far as our sexuality's concerned."
"Should I be listening to this?" half joked Ben, but he wanted to in any case.
"Come on," protested Jack, "I'm talking to my hot neighbour, not my maths master."
"Point taken. I was only giving you a get-out in case I embarrassed you."
"I think we lost all sense of embarrassment ages ago."
"That's if you ever had any in the first place."
"Anyway, while all the abuse was going on I went and took one of his shoes and hid it. Then Ted and I took our time getting changed, but it had the effect we wanted. Everybody else was changed and gone home with just us and Paul left. Mr Griffiths put his head round the door and told us to hurry up. Naturally we said 'Yes, sir!' and he went off quite content. So we helped Paul look for his shoe which Ted found and we did a pincer movement on him and chatted him up. Yes, he was serious. No way were we going to do anything at school. So here he is spending the weekend with us and having a thoroughly good time once he was sworn to secrecy."
"Do your Mum and Dad know what you're up to?"
"They've always been very good ever since we came out. They must know what Ted and me get up to, but they've never asked and after the initial invitation to talk to them whenever we wanted to they've never interfered. As you know, when we moved into this house they planned it so that our room is nowhere near theirs and Paul's in the spare room next to us."
"And is Paul enjoying himself?"
"We've made sure of that and there's more to come." Meanwhile Ted, Lewis and Paul were coming back to fill up their plates.
The following morning after church Ben and Lewis walked back slowly with the boys while Phil and Christina Batty went on ahead. Unsolicited Paul could hardly stop describing what a good time he'd been having without giving any details away at all. Little did he know at that point that he was among friends. Nor at that point did Ben and Lewis know that the twins had especially asked their parents to invite their godfather to Sunday lunch that weekend.
The summer holidays soon arrived. Ben needed a couple of weeks to wind dow